h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

hola perro de lluvia (you were close),

Just sent off your word-a-day subcription - you should get the first one tomorrow. Each week there is a new theme (this week's theme has been slang/informal words) and also once a week you get a 'feedback' email with responses from other subcription holders to that week's theme.

No, haven't finished The Lovely Bones yet. I find I am reading much less than usual these days. Possibly due to too much hootooing. But am still enjoying the book very much. Also, just received a copy of the new Harry Potter in the post this morning - someone sent it to me as a gift. So with that and the other two books I ordered from Amazon (The Autograph Man - Zadie Smith and Not the End of the World - Kate Atkinson short stories) I am now well set-up for summer reading.

Back is feeling somewhat better. Have resorted to pick 'n mix medication. Valium during the day and rioja in the evening. F*ck it. But in fact I think it's the anti-inflammatory tablets that are doing the most good. As I say, this Valium is for the birds. I mean, it's also supposed to be good for anti-anxiety but for the past two days I've had to take taxis to the hospital to teach as the dreaded panic attacks have returned. Found myself suddenly flipping out at the bus stop and so fled into the 'safety' of the nearest taxi. Gosh, I'm so weird sometimes.

Glad you like where I live. And no, will not ever think of moving out. But bear in mind that I rent out the flat next door (the two balconies to the right of mine facing the main street - with a wonderful picture-postcard view of the Giralda tower) if you and yours ever want to spend some time in Sevilla. So far I have the entire flat free for the last two weeks of August, but it's hellishly hot here then. Though I actually quite like the heat. Anyhow, there are three bedrooms (three beds) next door and I also have a nice comfy airmattress for use.

I'd love to see photos of you and your family. Chai recently sent me photos of himself and his three kids ('kids' are quite grown up, in their twenties) and it was interesting to see what he looks like. So far I have received photos from Chai, Moth, Zarquon, Hoovooloo and I saw Alji in the photos he posted of his son's wedding. And Noggin is also promising to send me a photo soon - he's been having server probs with his email. It's quite nice being able to put a face to the name.

Yes, it is strange that I look like Sandra. I've never met anyone who looks like me, though she is obviously a younger (and probably thinner) version. I also hate having my photo taken, which is why I have nothing more recent than the one I sent. Well, bit of a lie, just found another (slightly chubbier) one taken two years ago with my friend Darlene's teenage daughter - when she was here staying with me for a month.

Good luck with the HTML reading. I have no idea what that is. Will this make you a web-master? My Toronto friend David is a web-master and can design wonderful web pages.

Oh, I remember the first time I saw The Cook, the Thief, etc. When it first came out. Have seen it once more since, but not for ages now. Gorgeous film. Also, I think Helen Mirren (soon to become Dame Helen Mirren, I read yesterday) is one of the finest actresses ever. I've have it in my Amazon shopping basket for ages but will have to see how my summer classes go before ordering anything else.

And speaking of summer classes. Have actually had some luck. A woman started classes with me this morning. Says she wants to learn English in one month! So she is going to be taking hour-and-a-half classes *every day* from now until the end of July. Yipee! €€€! And on Monday another guy is starting hour-long classes four days a week for July. More €€€ He's a musician and his band is recording a CD in August - the songs are in English. So my job will be to help him with his pronunciation. Sounds like fun.

Also, this new woman, Mercedes, is so interesting. We totally 'clicked' this morning. She took two university degrees, one was anthropology (can't remember the other) and says her 'problem' is that she keeps changing her mind about what she wants to do, so she keeps studying and learning new things. I think she is in her late forties - I was shocked when she told me she has 27 and 25-year-old daughters, and a 22 year-old son as she doesn't look old enough to have a kids that age. She also has a wonderful sense of humour. And I got the sense that she thought I was a very good and thorough teacher after I explained my 'course outline' for her for the month. So that is nine new classes a week! Which almost makes up for the majority of my regular students going away for the summer. Of course, still nothing lined up for August, but heck, that's a whole five weeks away. Perhaps by then I'll have my AlternaTours biz going a bit. Also have to rent out the flat next door in August. Fingers crossed!

Hmmm. Have I rambled on enough here? I think so. Oh, forgot to tell you that 'he who shall not be named' referred to you as 'Hangdog' yesterday in response to your posting. I think he is feeling a bit pressured because so many people on that thread totally backed me up after his last 'insult az' binge. Even Moth is sounding a bit testy with him (she just got back after a week-long absense due to having her telephone line cut by road-repair guys). Me? Am maintaining a dignified silence.

Okay, that's more than enough of me for one posting. Catch you later.

hasta los dedos heridos,
az

sometimes I despair - do you?

probably best to just go to bed now.

Fat and Ugly az

Please ignore last posting - it was the muscle relaxant talking

hasta la resaca,
az

(btw, it was just an oversensitive - who me? - response to something someone said to me on another link, nuthin serious)

check this out.

http:/www.littlestevensundergroundgarage.com/contentspagexx.htm

Then click on the archive thingy and listen to some very wonderful music!

az

sorry, that link didn't work. trying again

http://www.littlestevensundergroundgarage.com/contentspagexx.htm

yes?

hey raindude,

just saw you were online - so hello!

az

When I can get my daughter to sort out her being the default setting I'm going to get MSN messenger sorted out so it's me when I am online-I'll let you know when it's sorted. Did the email of the boy arrive by any chance? Probably not with my hotmail working as much as I do. Glad to hear you're keeping busy (profitably), I was thinking that it would be really clever to be able to do that then remembered that I actually can speak English, quite well actually-don't know how I could forget. Listened to Little Steven, can't say I agree with his seven records that changed the world-didn't include Anarchy in the UK, or Tutti Frutti, or even Bohemian Rhapsody for that matter.

Hangdog eh? That is really so clever, I am distraught, cut to the quick. Knew I shouldn't have taken on such a rapier wit, doomed from the start I was, mark my words, doomed. Whatever next, spraindog? Brainsmog?, my personal favorite that one. I'll just cower in this dank corner waiting for the inevitable coup de gras. Doomed I tell you, doomed. Time for supermarket shopping-whoopee for me,

Hangdog, renamed, shamed, lamed and unjustly blamed. Ha.

Rain.

greetings hangdog!

Ah yes, is not this person the apex of cleverness?

The email of the boy? No idea what you are talking about, so obviously did not receive that one.

Re: MSN messenger - hey great. I'll send you my Hotmail address on an email (like yours, it has my full name and so I don't want to post it here).

Well, one doesn't have to agree with Little Steven in order to enjoy the music. I had such a great time yesterday listening to a programme and totally strolling down musical memory lane. Heck, there was even an interview with Brian Jones (was absolutely in love with that guy when I was ten-years-old).

Hey! Just received the boy photo this instant. My god he is gorgeous! I mean it. What a face. And the look in his eyes.

Am going to post this now and send you an email with my Hotmail address.

soon,
az

re-holitas,

Okay, I have sent you my Hotmail address. But I also put you on my MSN list, so you should be getting a thingy from them asking you if you accept this or not.

I think if your daughter is also using Hotmail and MSN she just has to be sure to sign out each time. And then you sign in each time. Doesn't sound too complicated to me.

I did the glamorous food shopping thing earlier this morning. Did I tell you that one of my summer tenants is a woman - Kale - who was my flatmate here a couple of years ago (before I moved into my very own flat)? Anyhow, she is back for the summer, staying next door, and it is so lovely having her here as both friend and neighbour. In fact, it was Kale who convinced me that I should move next door and keep on the old flat and rent out the rooms to visiting historians. She is also an historian. Anyhow, she told me my place is so perfect for people like her coming here to do research - especially as I live just two minutes away from the Archivos de Indias. And so, largely thanks to her, I have done this.

Anyhow, she is a total workaholic I think. She spends all weekdays from 8-3 at the Archives doing research. Then after lunch she sleeps for about four hours so that she can stay up until about 4am working on her other stuff. Nutter! So I don't get to see her much except at weekends. But we now have a Saturday morning going-out-for-breakfast-and-shopping routine happening that is very pleasant.

She has even paid me the ultimate compliment by saying that spending time with me relaxes her so much as I am just such an easy person to be around. She presently has two other historians sharing the flat next door with her and apparently, although they are very nice people, they drive her mental because they don't seem to know 'when to leave her alone'. I think this is a bit funny because when Kale was my flatmate two years ago I often felt something similar about her - she always wanted to chat when I was busy trying to do something else - or just when I felt like being on my own. Anyhoodle. She is lovely. And it's great having her here. We often have chats between my kitchen window and her living room window (across the patio) which is also kinda 'homey' and nice.

So yes, as far as July looks - I am doing just fine financially. August is still looming rather scarily as ALL the classes I have this month will totally disappear and I will have to find others. Also, Kale is my only tenant booked in next door for August so far. EEK!

Anyhow, things are very quiet here today. I think a lot of people have gone off to the big Hootoo bash in London. I am thinking I might like to do this next summer (when I'm rich - ha).

Still reading The Lovely Bones. Weird. Usually I devour books but recently have not been reading as much as before. This is probably good as I cannot afford to buy any more new books and so this way they will last longer.

hasta whatever,
az

buenas domingo,

Am about 3/4 of the way throught The Lovely Bones and only just this morning whilst lazily lying in bed and reading it hit me - duh - wow, this book must have (maybe) hit you given the fact that it is about a family with two teenage daughters and a small boy.

Am still mostly crying my way through it. Okay, not sobbing my heart out constantly, but I do often have tears in my eyes while I'm reading and my heart feels rather uncomfortably stuck in my throat.

Going back to read some more of it now. F**k cleaning the house!

az

The ages are broadly the same in the book and strangely Jenny and I read it only crying once-I'll let you guess when after you have finished it-Sandra cried the whole way through and thought it was a terrible sad miserable frightening horrible book, I almost quote. I've started Pi properly and am currently liking it but waiting for it to get underway.

I'm going to meet the parents of my little autistic lad tomorrow morning to see if we get on and they think I'm suitable. I'm not too worried as it is just about personality and if we don't get on it's not really anyones fault. Having said that I would like us to get on. Have finally got to the bottom of the problem with MSN messenger-Lucy didn't realise that we had it so she reloaded it-when it asked her if she wanted to overwrite the earlier version she did, thus removing me and my contacts at a stroke. Will reload it again at the weekend with all of us as users then I'll be up and running.

Second warm night without alcohol, sleeping badly but well, if that makes any sense-waking feeling good but taking ages getting there. Getting more reading done but tired. Been to the gym again and haven't overdone it this time-walking in Wales again Friday so need to go to the gym and get some stamina from somewhere by then. Miserable overcast day here, we call it 'Summer'-trust you are in the grip of a heatwave such as the world has seldom seen?

Haven't been on the God Squad since my last post there to the Toxic Avenger, may his name be feared but seldom spoken. Can't seem to find the oomph-it was so nice to start with, friendly and even-handed, now I think you'd have more chance of a reasoned argument on the Aryan Nation site. I think people like Moth view being patronised as the price of admission, and that when they are inside it will stop. I don't think it works like that and those that think of themselves as the big Alpha Doggies will always need bolsters to their perceived omnipotence, and so will always keep them in their place. I believe in hip hop circles the term is 'house-ni88ers' although I can't really get behind the wording (and doubt I'd be able to if I were black), the imagary works. I can't see you fitting into the model for such a position any more than I can see you applying for the job- 'Assholes mate'- as such you are expendable, I'd worry not a jot about that matey.

Goodbye for now.

Rain, soon to be technically minded.

hi Brainsmog!

Stangely or otherwise, the last third of The Lovely Bones left me, not cold exactly, but sort of feeling detached. Also, when she 'makes love' with Ray - well, that just didn't work for me at all. So, I didn't think the book ended as well as it began. But yes - a very good read.

Can't guess which part of the book both you and Jenny cried at - tell, tell . . .

'Sleeping badly but well'. Yes, makes sense. Have yet to rally the iron will necessary to not drink any rioja. Personally, I just think I need more hugs.

Yeah, the God Squad is sometimes annoying, other times boring. Nah, my 'role' there now is mostly comic relief I reckon. I post my silly Quotes de Día and ask obvious questions, much to the annoyance of some I think. I also remind people to mind their manners when they are being rude or thoughtless. Well, except for you-know-who (lost cause, that one). Just had to do that today, in fact. Anyhow, you should check out the first few pages of that thread (if you haven't done so already). It used to be much more interesting and fresh. Well, what can one expect after almost 10,000 postings? I think Noggin told me he had started around posting 125 so I checked it out from there for a few pages - it was quite entertaining.

Started classes with the musician, Pablo. He is so sweet. Anyhow, at first I was just correcting his pronunciation but now I am helping him re-write song lyrics! Told him I want a credit on the CD liner. Even though I am probably almost three times his age he seems to think I'm kinda cool. Yesterday when I changed one of his song lines he sat back in his chair and said - 'Wow! I like that a lot! Rose dust!' (had to be there).

This aft I have a class with Pablo at 5pm. Then from 6.30-8.30 a double class with father and son Agustins playing Pictionary with a friend of mine. After which am inviting friend out for tapas. Could only convince young Agustin to take classes in July if I promised not to try and teach him any grammar.

Let me know how your meeting went with the kid's parents. I am now going to read my Sunday Times. Yes, I know it's Wednesday, but I can't buy it until Monday and well, so what.

nos vemos pronto!
az

(technically minded by who?)

ps
are you receiving your word-a-day? do you like it?

azharita chiquitita

ps again,

letter to the editor in The Times:

NOT CRICKET: The Spanish supported us in the Iraq war and we send them this pair*. Is this the way we repay our allies?


*the Beckhams, natch.

hey hangdog!

Help me out here. The Toxxic Avenger is now trying to say that paedophilia is just 'a state of mind' and is not a crime at all. And he has used the 'age of consent' factor as a means for - what? Justifying paedophelia? Is this person totally off his rocker? He also seems to equate paedophilia with homosexuality? Hmmm. Wonder what he is actually saying about himself?

Anyhoodle, there was another 'az attack' yesterday on the God thread - nothing to do with me, I was just posting to other people. But I got attacked by you-know-who. Math, the friendly neigbourhood Druid, came to my rescue and made T grovel a bit - but then he came back with this paedophile crap.



az

what's new?

OK I have officially left this thread but this I got to see.

I've read the thread from a few days back, well almost a week. That comment is typical of Voldemort, or the other unnamed one, he puts two incendiary things close, but not touching and waits for the arguments to start, then he'll refer you to the earlier postings and ask you to tell him where he said one thing was like the other, or related, or even similar. It's a typical argumentative trick. As near as makes no difference but not proveably concrete. He did it earlier with the "correct me if i'm wrong- Oh no! I said correct me, not point out that I *was* wrong-ha ha your mistake!" bollocks. He'd be a very up his own arse 'I am so bloody clever' chess player I would bet the farm, but probably not very good. The trick is to stay big fish in small pond. So you get a personal attack on yourself-identifiable because it a) personally attacks what he believes to be your intellectual argument and without the traditional 'I think that they mean', just ploughs in there with a cast-iron 'what they mean is...'and b) does that arse thing of coming up with many many justifications that propel forward the global health of discussion 'attacks on argument are healthy', and the lovely old chestnut'where would we be if we all thought the same', to justify the attack. So logically attacking arguments is good but being subversive is bad, and all this defined for us without the need for us to do any of the thinking for ourselves by....yes, HIM. I also love the backpeddaling way he tries to welcome every new person-get in there first and befriend newcomers, then call being an arse something like 'orneriness', Richard Farnsworth was ornery; Jack Elam was ornery, he's just trying to keep down anyone who will disagree with His Awful Majesty. And I left in a 'fit of pique' did I?

Incidentally did you ever notice that the first people you meet anywhere who say it like they have all the friends in the world and show you around, always, and I mean ALWAYS, turn out to be universally despised and living in some sort of fantasy world? Happens with me. So much so that I now make a point of not making a good first impression to shake them off.

I'm going to a Garden Party now that I have ranted/argued for a while-you just enjoy yourself y'hear? And don't be seducing any small Spanish muso boys unless you thoroughly clean them first-then they should be OK-here other people would put a smiley.

Rain, better today than yesterday,nearly another half-stone gone and biceps appearing, WOOF!

buenas tardes, raindude,

You know, I reckon it was just a wind-up. And almost all of us fell for it. Which I am sure gave the nameless one much pleasure. Sod it. (can you believe he's 59?)

So now that you are down another half-stone I guess you can send me your photo now!

az

muy buenas tardes, perro de lluvia,

So, what's with the MSN? Will you be sorting that out this weekend? It would be both nice and weird to have a RT chat with you sometime. Anyhow, have sent you an 'invitation' to accept me at your Hotmail address. And if you do, then you will be on my MSN list, and I'll be on yours. Easy-peasy.

Not much else going on this weekend. Have been doing my weekend morning routine - taking my hour-long bike ride and then meeting my friend Kale for breakfast. Then walking around town for an hour or two. It's nice. But then I come home and think - now what? Of course that is stupid because I have a seemingly endless list of things I *should* be doing, yet I don't do them. I wonder why?

HUMP is still hurting like f**k, so I *will* call a doctor tomorrow - any doctor at this point - and set up an appointment to get x-rays taken in order to get a proper DIAGNOSIS. In my vasty experience with various doctors I have never felt confident that they actually know anything more than I do about my own body. My own diagnosis is that I need a treatment of massage and back manipulation stuff, with a series of specific exercises in order to help me regain my previous un-humped posture. And perhaps I will have to splash out for a new chair to use while I am in front of the computer.

Really though, I know the fault is all mine. I have just been too lazy the last three years or so after my op. I think I maybe fell into a bit of a depression time and so stopped doing everything I used to be doing to keep body and back limber. Which is also why I put on weight. And okay, major hormonal flux after an op like mine is to be expected - with all the emotional stuff that goes along with that. And because my LIFE is also in constant flux, well, you know, it's hard sometimes to find one solid piece of ground to rest my weary feet on sometimes. It's like everything is totally up-in-the-air all of the time, and this gets very very tiring after about twenty/thirty years or so.

Meanwhile, I know I have no excuse to complain because I chose my path. Well, except that complaining is a hobby of mine.

I just don't want this hobby to become my full-time profession - ya know what I mean?

Anyhoodle, I reckon that after I finally see a doctor here about the HUMP situation they will end up telling me everything I already know but have been too lazy or - what? - to be doing. But I know that I need massage and back work done by a professional, and I am hoping I can get this done via my private health insurance, which I pay for every month even though the last time I went to the doctor was about two years ago. So I should be able to get some sort of physio-therapy going at least. Massages! I need this so much. But cannot afford to pay for this unless I cancel my private health insurance. And I don't want to do that in case I suddenly fall ill and need a stay in hospital or whatever. Ho hum.

Perhaps you can explain to me just how you are suddenly being so adept at having the self-discipline to be doing what you are doing with the diet and not drinking? I need help with this, I think. At least, I need a solid reason to stop being so stupid. What triggered this for you? And how hard have you found it to maintain this? I mean, all ENVY aside, I am totally happy for you - I think this is wonderful. I just wish I could be doing the same.

You didn't tell me about the bit in The Lonely Bones where both you and your daughter cried. Did the whole book work for you? I have told you that the end of the book kind of faltered for me. But, anyhow. Now I am reading The Autograph Man. So far am enjoying it.

This morning the nameless one stupidly attacked me again for something I jokingly said to Della - about her not being 'superior' to her cats. Snore. Perhaps this is why you don't like cats. For me, the idea that I am in anyway 'superior' to these graceful and gorgeous felines who are the total centre of their own universe is quite absurd. They don't NEED me. But they very graciously allow me to take care of them. I love this about them. They don't have the 'doggy' totally blatant and open love for their 'masters' that dogs have. Well, because they aren't dogs. It's a more subtle thing with cats. I always say that I don't 'have cats' but rather my cats 'have a human'. Me. This cracks me up. You have to understand that I am soooooooooooo careful about nobody ever ever ever taking advantage of me (typical knee-jerk response that people who have been abused as children tend to have) that I have built up all sorts of walls in an effort to prevent this ever happening to me again. But my cats? They walk all over me! They don't give a flying f*ck if I am having a bad day, they still want their food and their daily cuddles. And this is the point. The cuddle factor. They know I need this too. It's quite nice. When I am feeling particularly 'unwell' I suddenly find myself surrounded by cats who try to distract me by doing stupid cat things that make me laugh or otherwise demanding my attention - they don't always do this, you see. So it's not total unconditional 'doggy love' I get from them, rather very specific 'cat clever love' when they sense all is not well with their human. Then they lay on the affection big time. Strange beasts. Don't know what I would do without them.

How was the garden party? No, I shan't be seducing any small Spanish boys. You kiddin me? I can't even get interested in Spanish men! More's the pity. They are just TOO Spanish. If I ever meet a Spanish man that I feel I can get along with he will have to be someone who has studied and lived abroad and who also speaks English. The general Spanish mentality is way too conservative and narrow to interest me much, though I have more success with meeting interesting Spanish women somehow.

Meanwhile, I never wonder - what am I doing here? I am here because this is my home. THAT is the one true thing I know.

az

That was truly freaky. You disappeared. I ended up getting this other person theatening me on-line. Then your name disappeared off my MSN list.

Lucy devil child? Using extremely nasty, abusive and threatening language. I mean - what the f**k?

az