h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Talk to me, oh denizen of the w**k thread- i am b o r e d

So bored in fact, that i'm of to bed now I could be rude and interupt one of your current threads to attract your attention, but hey i'm just not that rude guy

I expect you'll come across this little 'ol post in a few months time while you're doing some houswork in your space- doing a bit of dusting that sort of thing, but by then it'll be too late- my need for boredom relief will have long gone- the moment passed..... like tears in the rain

Ahhh, well nice to know I'm the person people come to when they're bored !!

For some reason I never pay attention to the personal replies I get...I really must start looking at that more often ...still, you're asleep now anyway, so I may as well have just left it...!

Kristy

No, no not at all. To prove it, look i'm talking to you now and i'm on a roller coaster, breathing helium, while cuddling a beatiful woman(and typing this on my lap top), and i've just won 3 milllion £, and look- i'm still talking to you!

Wow, you must be easily bored if you can be on a rollercoaster, breathing helium, recently made rich and in the embrace of a beautiful woman...and still need your computer...much less to be talking to me...(when by all rights I probably should be w**king like a good girl)

Yeah, well what can i say- i have a low boredom threshold

Anyways, i am in actual fact back to w**k tommorow(oops wrong thread), after...ah heck just read the name. My voice is still stuffed- i'm so hoarse that if i was a woman i would be sounding sexy, but unfortunantely i just sound silly. It only lasts a few minutes anyway before turning into a whisper/rasp that makes me sound like a phone pest great eh.

Ah well it's not as if i work in sales or anything where i need my voice. Oh wait, i forgot.. i do work in sales

How would it sound sexy in a woman but not in a man ? When I get that husky Nico kinda thing going on...people at work tell me I sound sexy (which isn't appropriate in this office ) but I think I sounds like a drag queen...

I could never work in sales...I don't like...things...or people....

(just be mindful of the laptop when you go through a loop on the rollercoaster )

wwwwwwoooooooooosssssssssssshhh.

Oh thank god that's over. I'm just sitting at the bottom of the ride now. Just relaxing for a bit.

yeah- that's it- i sound like a drag queen Hey- i don't like things or people either! You think i maybe shouldnt be in this job?
Anyway it's 11pm here in darkest Scotland(well apart from the streetlighting, and the quaint glow from children setting fire to each other) so i'm about to sign off.

Enjoy the rest of your day w**ing, and remember use plenty hand cream. er...why's my seat moving...sh*t wwwooooooooooooooooossshhhhh

A Scottish drag queen...I gotta get me one of them !

I've been working in the sam office for nearly 5 years...these people know what I'm like...and most of them know well enough to stay away from me ....and they made me fire warden for the floor...hmm...me...incharge of the lives of people I don't like...this could be fun...

Well, enjoy your sleep...when you wake up it will be today...well, it's today here now...but there it's only yesterday...

Tell the children that Irish Whiskey burns better than scotch...I don't know why, but it just does...

And if you see a nice cave in the Highlands for sale, drop me a line...I'm looking for a place to spend my retirement !

Kristy

What's a 'sam' office?
I'm ok with people,as long as it's after about 2 or 3 in the afternoon-before that i hate everyone,and everything everone says, especially customersbut everone knows i despise mornings/afternoons so most folk just smile and rush past me until i'm ready to talk. With customers i give them the false smile, whilst secretly thinking to myself 'must kill zem, must kill zem all'. Then when i'm awake and relaxed, fellow humans are just great, and we all get on like one big family

Yes the day/hemisphere thing confuses me as well. Was trying to work out whether Thurday was just starting for you when i was going to bed, or whether you were already onto friday. oh hell for all i know it couldve been the weekend already for you ...Oh and i find children burn perfectly well all on there own, especially the fat ones

Will have to fight you for the cave- though my retirement plans involve a nice wee island off the west coast

Oops...I meant same office...my poor little fingers aren't properly connected to my brain, I'm afraid ...

I'm barely human until I've had about 10 coffees and as many cigarettes, the main problem being that by that time I'm supposed to be going to bed...which could go a ways towrds explaining the insomnia ...I can be civil...even nice on occassion...but at work it's a best of a trial...and on the weekends I follow the happy people around so that I don't have to be "the friendly one"

This weekend was actually interesting because my girl (my partner in crime...and the bright bubbly one of the duo ) wasn't out at all...so the people who usually talk to us were stuck with having to talk to me...some of them were very suprised at what I'm like when I am forced to make conversation on my own...

(Oh, and for the record, we're 11 hours ahead of you...although I think that's a little on the conservative side myself ).

Surely there's more than one cave? We could get ones next to each other and be cave-neighbours...although that does kind of defeat the purpose of moving to a cave to become a recluse......

Cave neighbours.. hmmm, i dunno, there might be a small chance of us running into each other at some point before late evening, and then we'de have to be really unpleasant to each other. Then again as i suspect we both derive a certain pleasure from our grumpiness (are you a member of p.u.d.d.i.n.g by the way?, then it may actually be perversly pleasurable in a kind of counter-intuitive anti-whtsit....er what am i talking about

Anyway, we'll discuss it nearer to our retirement me thinks...

Oh and i don't doubt you're lightyears ahead of us -most counties are. Any country that has had a prime minister who has voiced to his opponent the immortal line (and i paraphrase) "the right honerable gentleman, with all due respect, is such a woose, i bet he steps out the shower to take a piss", during a political debate, gets my vote

So you and your girl do a kind of 'good cop, bad cop' routine with folk then?

I think you may be right...I have a few mates down here (mostly boys) whose sole purpose is to bear the brunt of my grumpy evilness...I'm mean to them...they're mean to me...and at the end ov every night they hug me before they go...God bless 'em !

Government wise I don't know if we're far ahead of you at all...the opinion seems to be that the UK is America's lap dog...meanwhile we're following them both around like the runt of the litter...

And I don't know if you'd call it "good cop bad cop" she's just one of those happy shiny people who can strike up a conversation with anyone...I'm the socially retarded person who starts to freak out if I have ot talk to more than one operson at a time...

...Saturday night was alright because most of the people who came to talk to me came up one at a time...

Yep- I've always been a 'one to one' type person. I don't usually do very well in groups

I've got a shiny happy type pal- i just tend to let him get on with it, while i look the other way, but with the proviso that it aint morning i can usually hold my own in the happy situations, as long as there's the oddor handy

I've always had the impression that australians just get on with it, and don't really give a rats ar*se what any other country thinks. Britain definitly looks across the pond to the yanks as if they are some kind of mature big brother and tries to follow their example. The phrase i've heard is that we are always about 5 years behind America... in everything... Obesity, really bad television, speaking out for our 'rights', litigation... oh and i'm sure there's some good things as well.

Personally i think we should be looking to Europe, for inspiration. they are miles ahead in terms of 'green' policies, and just generally being nice to each other. But i may be wrong- politics aint my strong point

Later, cavebuddy

and

I think as a general rule Aussies don't care what anyone else thinks of them being Aussies...but these days it seems like we want to be America...

...I'd rather be Aussie - American beer is just WRONG ...

...Havig said that, I drink Guinness...but Aussie beer is still one ofmy first loves .

Guinness is an Irish beer! But i know what you mean..
American beer is watered down pigswill, with the delightful aftertaste of pi*s. Almost any country produces better beer than America.

What is your favorite alcoholic beverage?

I know Guinness is Irish....which is why I had to seperate it...apart from Guiness (my first true love ) I prefer Aussies beers every time...All the American beer I've tasted is too soft for most of the girls I know...

But in order of preference...

Guinness (I don't know why, but I think I'm addicted )
Whiskey or Scotch (Naturally Jameson's first )
Then Aussie Beer (Vic Bitter, Melbourne Bitter, Carlton Draught, etc, etc)

you know, this is a terrible subject...I won't be drinking for another 12 hours...

Why you nobody's baby now What happened? you can tell your cave buddy, or stick it on your journal so that the whole world can pry into your personal life(not that this is exactly private)..Anyway, sorry in advance Of hearing what happened. Hope you're ok

You're complaining about 12 hours without . I've been unwell last few weeks, and alcohol just passed my lips on tuesday for the first time in about 3 weeks

I like 'real ale'- you know stuff you can stand a spoon up in. Current favorites are Deuchars IPA and Orkney Dark Isle, though the latter is pretty rare in pubs. The trouble with real ales(or guest ales) is that most pubs have diferent ones on every week- so chances are, if you like something-tough you'll probably never drink it again

Also enjoy Guinness, though it is so variable in quality that it is hard to find a pub that regularly sells the good stuff. And i definitely cant drink it all night, otherwise apart from being very i will be a *very* regular visitor to the toilet the next day...

Also like Whiskey(or scotch if you prefer). Jamesons is nice, and i like peaty ones like Laphroig. You can tell this is a favorite subject of mine..

Oh, I can talk about alcohol all day...it just makes me thirsty !

I went to a pub once with a friend of mine that made their own beer...it was lovely...I had the stout and she had some sort of rasberry beer...it was all so delightful...

*considers the 12 hour bus trip back to Canberra for more beer*