h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hi Logan76

I've been sent your brilliant entry for subediting at A860384

I've done a bit of work on it, so do take a look and let me have any comments.



Bels

Hi Bels-

Sorry for the delay. Thanks for editing my article. The changes are minor, and they look good to me. I've only spotted a few problems. In the "Later Career" section, first paragraph, the word "show" in Tonight Show, needs to be italized and capitalized.

In the last paragraph of that section, this sentance:

His dedication to his specific type of music and his consistency in his choice of songs, and manner of performing, are remarkable and largely-unheard of in contemporary music.

is badly constructed. Is there a better way to say that? Maybe not, or maybe moving the commas around will make it read better:

His dedication to his specific type of music, and his consistency in his choice of songs and manner of performing, are remarkable and largely-unheard of in contemporary music.

I'm not sure. Also, I don't think we need a hyphen in "largely-unheard of".

Also, someone else suggested I should put in some links. The only useful one I'm aware of is the offical website, www.leonredbone.com, so maybe you want to work that in. There are a few fans sites which are easy to find via any search engine, but I don't think any of them have that much information.

Other than that I don't have too many suggestions. It looked pretty good to me when I wrote it, and you haven't changed much. Thanks for fixing up my spelling to the British standards. I live in Canada, and while we're supposed to use British spelling, we often lapse. Let me know if you have any questions.

-Logan

Hi Logan

Yeah, I know there are a couple of minor things to fix. As long as there's nothing major!

I usually do links as the next stage.

Get back to you soon.

Bels