h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

How about this.....

Missouri is a state of marked contrast, with swampy lowlands in the southeast, the Ozark Plateau in the south and rolling prairies in the north. Missouri borders eight states: Arkansas on the south; Oklahoma, Kansas and Nebraska on the west; Iowa on the north; and Illinois, Kentucky and Tennessee on the east. The state's two primary cities were built to take advantage of river travel – Kansas City in the west on the Missouri River and St. Louis in the east just south of the confluence of the Missouri and the Mississippi. Industry has replaced agriculture as the bedrock of the state's economy. Missouri produces nearly half of all the beer consumed in the United States, has more naturally occurring caves than any other state (0ver 5,500), is home to the world's first ice cream cone, first hot dog on a bun, first iced tea and first cotton candy. The most recognizable monument is the Gateway Arch in St. Louis. The state capital is Jefferson City.

Looks great.
May I remove the bit about the states it borders, though? I think I only used those in the paragraphs about states where I didn't really have anything to say about them... and there's plenty out there to say about Missouri.



...It actually made me sick to compliment Missouri just now.

Is that true about the first hot dog on a bun? I've heard that the first hot dog came from Ohio, but I have no idea if that's true or not. I guess that the bun is important to the meal, but I usually get tired of it after a while and just eat the meat.
(bread isn't my favorite thing)

This is going in the entry with a very few changes (St. Louis becomes St Louis... I don't know why, but it does) and you get another entry credited to you

I just realized that the border bit was largely already in my entry.


Well, with all that great material you gave me, we don't need it anymore.

1904 - St. Louis World's Fair - first hot dog on a bun or roll as some folks call them.

Have you recovered yet from complimenting Missouri? Here, have a hotdog, an ice cream cone and a glass of iced tea. And some tickets to a Cardinal's game. (You can use the tomato to make ketchup for the hotdog.)

Hyp, I'm alright.
But if you could fly over here on an airplane (Wright Brothers, 1903), I would certainly give you a bun-less hotdog (Harry Stevens, 1900), but I would hope you wouldn't be stopped by a police car (first in Akron) at a traffic light (Cleveland first). I'd take you to a Reds game (first professional baseball team) and give you a pop-top can (invented in Kettering).

Also, you know that yellow line they use during football broadcasts to show where the first down is? A local man invented that.

Nanners, nanners.

Suppose I could parachute out over Cincinnati - (first parachute jump over St. Louis - March 1, 1912).

(or lightbulb, rather - Edison born in Milan, Ohio)
Good idea.

You can buy your lightbulbs (and just about anything else) at JC Penny - born in Hamilton, MO.

Interesting you should mention Hamilton, because that's the county Cincinnati is in, which happens to sport the world's first ambulance system, established in 1865, just in case that lightbulb electrocutes you.

As reported I'm sure by Joseph Pulitzer in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch.

Whose paper, I'm sure, was rightfully used by Annie Oakley for target practice.

Who wasn't nearly as famous as Jesse James.

Who would have been brought into custody by police cars, which were first used in Akron.

You win.

Ok, so that's Jordan 4 billion, H one.
(and I spotted you the one)

Your tally is somewhat skewered there, oh Ohio Wonderkind. I seriously doubt if it would stand up to Peer Review.

On a more somber note - if I don't get my strawberry bed cleaned out and mulched today I'm going to lose my plants. And rain is forecast for the entire day. However, the sun is shining at the moment, causing me to suspect that the weatherman was trained somewhere in Ohio.

My tomato plants are gorgeous this year, by the way. I shall have ammunition all summer.

Did you know that Ohio's state drink is tomato juice and it is the second most tomato producing state?

No, I didn't know that. Good for Ohio. I love tomato juice in the mornings. I drink it instead of orange juice. As should you - to keep up the Ohio image, of course. Forget that it's good for you. Do it for Ohio.

I don't actually like tomato juice...

That's a shame. Keep trying. You have to drink it for Ohio. And for your image. What will people think if they find out that you refuse to drink the state drink? I hate to think of the mass disillusionment. Oh the humanity!