h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

as i suspected,

Smacking a toddler is effective because they don't have the language skills to understand why they shouldn't do that, but as kids get older they'd rather take the smack than get grounded or have their treats taken away. Just my tuppen'orth

I'll see what i can do Rev Jack Russel, but i don't know how much of an effect i can have on the lad.

I think maybe taking it out of his pocket money from your mum, Serephina. If he says "thats not fair" (i swear the kid's a teenager already) then ask him 'why it isn't fair, that you take from him, while he takes from you.'

I still think letting him earn some money, by cleaning cars or the flat, might help. The act of actually earing his own money, might make him appreciate it a bit more, so that he spends it more wisely not just on sweets.

coolio! i'm glad someone else is in the "nip it in the bud mode" sort of thinking its all to do with anything that works.

I think if he learns the value of money that is not a bad thing. Doing chores should keep him out of mischief too

Thats what I was meaning Tracey, theres no reasoning with a toddler, so a short sharp slap,thats more noise than anything else if you do it right is effective, but once theyre old enough to have a discussion, taking things away and talking about it 'is 'better.
My problem is a good whingy tantrum n ill back down too easy ..


He has lacked a stable male infulence I guess (the couple he's had have been short lived n not hthat great by far),so i agree ith the Rev to a point..

please its not a criticism of anyone!


RJR

I didnt say it was..merely a valid point

ok

And i have this to come, also as me and me missus are army brats and we were placed in boarding school, our nipper has had her place sorted all ready

so how do you feel about boarding schools??

Personally I feel they're a bit of a cop out!
not to mention that children are better off with their parent(s) anyway...

Well i thiink they prepare your nipper for life better, me and my missus were sent to these type of schools (dad's were in the army) authough i think its not for some kids.

The relationship children have with their parent(s) is what pretty much shapes their ability to form other relationships. how does being denied that prepare them for life better?or being denied all the other things a child gets from being with their parents?
I personally feel that if you cant be arsed to raise a child yourself,or at least try, you shouldnt have them in the first place..

Well absolutely. This all started in the late sixties, when gratuitous sex became socially permissible. A first generation of children who weren't really wanted were born.

Now we are a generation on, and more children are being born who to the sixties kids, who have been exposed to no parenting skills whatsoever. It's quite pleasing to see parenting columns in newspapers and control-your-brat programmes on TV these days - clearly somebody has realised something needs to be done.

B

I didnt particularly want a baby when i fell pregnant with josh,certainly wasnt the righht time in my life and I knew I'd be on my own..but I'd made my bed! I'ts not been easy n I've been far from what I'd call a model parent at times..,were sill learning together.but I'd still like to think hes gained more than from being sent away some where!

I'd certainly agree. The fact that he's academically very able is evidence of that.

B

How much of that type of thing do you think is hereditary though? are some kids predisposed to enjoy school more than others?

I think it's hereditary, but not genetic. And it's all down to what exposure to education kids get before school age. Parents who didn't enjoy school are much less likely to help their children expand vocabulary, maths ability or social skills at home - no wonder their children are going to hate school.

The lack of social skills is self-propagating: like inevitably breeds like. But our current literacy problems can be seriously abbreviated by parents at an early stage. Even sitting your pre-schooler down in front of the Schools programmes is better than nothing. The best parents will find half an hour to sit down and read with their kids before bedtime.

B