h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Yes. Also I like vampire fan shrimp. And froggies.

Have I mentioned yet that you're weird?

No I don't think you have. Why? Am I?

Yup

I can't tell if that's a very nice thing to say or not, so I don't know whether you need a kick in the shins.

Weirdery is the flavor that makes life taste like gumbo or perhaps jumablia

Normality is like the nasty sugar free food that tastes of cardboard.

Ok, I won't kick you then.

My parents came to see me and brought me a bag that says "I love everybody even you stupid idiots". They said it reminded them of me. Does that sound like something I would say?

We make sugar-free chocolate where I work that is actually very good! I buy it for my diabetic cousin and grandfather.

Mayhap, but sugar free cookies make the Claw weep.

And about that "I love everybody even you stupid idiots" thing, you haven't given any indication you would say something like that

Exactly. I'm way too nice to call all those stupid idiots what they are.

...

... to you too!

... ... to YOU!

*shock*

Good to "see" you.

Hello!

How goes?

Generally down the road. Excepting in the case of explosions. Then the car can travel by air. Briefly.

Hmmm... *records in notebook*

NO NOTES!