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SCORE!
Posted Jan 22, 2001
i just found out last night that an old high shcool crush had a reciprocating crush on me at the same time i did. this turned my world upside down... and then inside out... and then back to an enlightened abnormal. we talked about all the times we almost told each other, or the other person almost found out, and how many times we chickened out. it was an uplifting experience, seeing as now i have no secrets to hide from her, so even if we dont end up dating for some reason, well have this new fresh complete openness and honesty. im relieved basicly. this is also a great relief because i have finally just gotten over my previous girlfriend completely, so using that experience as step to move on, this new opportunity is another step in a positive direction. im feeling very happy. 
its such a relief in fact im exhausted from enjoying it. liking her was my biggest secret as far as dating goes, so that means i have no worries... HAKUNA MATATA!!! anyways, im thoroughly delighted to move on with rebecca, even if only in friendship, but with both our mutually infatuated histories merging, it wouldnt be so far out of line to actually turn it into a relationship, like we so very much wanted back in the day. i almost feel were at the point of like "well, now what? weve both confessed our obsessions over each other... what do we do now? do we date? do we pretend like it was just words and go on with our friendship unaltered?" i feel its really up to her for a handful of reasons. 1) she has just broken up with her boyfriend a month or so ago, and id rather she be definitely over and done with him 2) im 1000 miles away from her, so im not sure how shell handle that (maybe we'll wait each other out til the summer, and build the relationship in reality and proximity) 3) i can go either way... id like to go into a relationship, because as far as ive decided, shes the girl of my dreams, but ill settle for less 4) i believe she knows that im going to try to keep her from drinking as much as she does, which is something she wants to do anyways, but it might be a factor that will persuade her to say no 5)... this one is alotted for some reason i might not be aware of... she did mention she was sure how she felt because she was sorting things out in her life now. this is prolly the most romantic and impacting thing that has ever happened to me.... i believe in fate, if you give fate a chance. rebecca has made my millenium...
~plurrrrebecca
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Latest reply: Jan 22, 2001
update
Posted Jan 7, 2001
well, vaca is over, i need to pack, and i didnt do nearly as much as i wanted to, partially due to a lack of car. i had fun though... its nice to be back for a little bit, though my friends from high school are less bearable... i can feel everyone going their seperate ways, and the people getting hurt by it are the few who are (were?) naive enough to try and keep everyone together. though through the process, people have opened up and become more honest, just because they realized they weren't doing what they wanted to be doing, now, theyve finally asserted themselves. unfortunately, there is also a lot of two-facing going on, because i think everyone enjoys the memories, but theyve realized after the big change of going to college, what these people really are like. i have almost hypocritcally figured all this out before my friends, and then talked about how much theyre not like me, while continuing to hang out with them... mostly. there was a definite easrly distinction when i became best friends with a kid who'd only been in town for 2 years, and the butt of some of my friends jokes. so, i was ostrichized a bit. ANYWAYS... i also had my heart crushed by finding out that an ex-gf i still liked had a boyfriend, and cruddily, i found out theyre, well, "serious." i also found out im on offical "academic and financial aid probation" at school, which means i get kicked out next semester if i dont get good grades, but as much as that shouldnt bother because im transferring anyways, it doesnt help my history/transcript and it wont help for scholarships. thats the other big thing. im switching schools for the fall semester, and i have to decide where i wanna go. my parents laid down the line and said this is the last chance i get to make a mistake, and after this, im basicly kicked out of the house, and ill have to figure out what to do about college on my own. im also battled on the opposite side of me wanting to be free and on my own and playing in a band and making music, and just living a free and creative and inspiring lifestyle... but im a dreamer, and maybe the aforementioned ex-gf proves this, a known hopeless romantic. i am very tempted to not go back to tennessee, but i feel bad about terminating my friendships there so soon, because i can really see some good friends coming out of there. this sounds bad, but id prolly have even more friends had i gone to my classes. this is really long. and so is my hair, which is another ordeal. i like having long hair, except for some problems, so im considering cutting it, but i dont know what i want to get it cut like. having the long hair stems from not being like everyone else... so one thing i considered is getting it braided, like dreds, but cleaner and less permanent, and itll still be long, but ill have more control over it. other problems, i hurt my shoulder, and i finally got it looked at and got some treatment for it. a physical therapist gave me some excersizes to do... but im not supposed to be doing any sports/work for a couple of months... even though i like playing table tennis, raquetball, and bowling, the three sports im really getting into after a long stint of inactivity due to knee problems. shafted again. i also need to lose some weight so when i get back to school im going to try to figure out a new diet thatll be healthier, and thatll fit my meal plan. i have been eating comparatively healthier @ school though, a lot more produce, less denny's, rice, oatmeal, grilled cheese, and gourmet pasta from the pasta bar. my roommate is a loser too... im not even getting started on him. also, my new years eve party fell through, and then fell through again. my cousin had a miscarriage the day before new years, so i couldnt throw a party at the lake like i wanted to, and even when i bargained with my rents to have people over here, no one, but my good buddy cookish, showed up. no big deal... ferk them. so, in summation.... being home has its good and bad points, and i went from seeing a lot of good ones, to a lot of bad ones. im wallowing in depressing music so i dont do anything more drastic which i was going to do. but this being a new year i really smell the brisk air of change. i can finally move on and find a new girl, i can get my studies on track and start to do what i want to with my life, ive figured out who my friends really are (in more ways than one), i have motivation to get myself looking better, and i know what i have to work on with my personality and my social skills... so this break was the ultimate building block, the definite stepping stone, to a new fresh life......"... and now for something completely different"
~bri
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Latest reply: Jan 7, 2001
list of garbage words
Posted Dec 13, 2000
blert!
narf!
ert!
roate!
kneesk!
raff!
rort!
dowha!
flarr!
gnor!
more to come!
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Latest reply: Dec 13, 2000
WOOOHOOO!!!
Posted Dec 10, 2000
im goin the FLERK! home today, and im FROICKING psyched... i just need to pack a bag, hitch a ride to the airport, and im outta here... oh, i do have some business i need to take care of with people before i leave... no worries though. ::sings "come on eileen" and envisions the foo fighters "learn to fly" video:: ... i cant wait to get home!!!!!! !!!!!!
~plurrrrrrrrrrrrreturninghome
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Latest reply: Dec 10, 2000
homey for the holida
Posted Dec 9, 2000
whats up with that you might ask??? Y.. 
why! i need to figure out what im doing with my life and why and where im going and, etc.. ill stop fer now. BUT, i will be home for the holidays as my flight leaves tomorrow, and i hope to make some money working, have some fun with some friends, spend money buying lots of presents for other people, and just thoroughly enjoy my time home... and time away from my roommate... whos annoying. although im going home and hope to relax and enjoy it, i need to make some HUGE decisions about life, the universe, everything, and then some. hopefully ill come out on top, but one never knows, especially with me. i feel ready to go to a different school or start working again, but i dont feel ready to leave tennessee, as much as this is a waste of time and money. im enjoying the college life down here, as much as i can/want, and im not ready to leave the friends ive only become to share my life with. i am however planning on moving back home for the summer, with the intent of staying home and continue schooling in massachusetts. im must go now though, because im bored and getting slowly sucked into the world of h2g2, and thats really not what i need to be doing right now. i will write more later.
~plurrr
PS~ ive also made 7 new smileys that i hope will make their way onto h2g2, though i need to research the copyright infringement i may have committed, and then go back about, and do things in the proper manner, but hopefully these smileys will exist for common use:
you can preview them by following the directions on this page:
http://www.h2g2.com/FFM59373?thread=91166&skip=20&show=20#p758928
i hope you enjoy them!
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Latest reply: Dec 9, 2000
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100 watt warlock of rock (aka plurrr) the Keeper of Last Minute Disasters, Minister of Green
Researcher U162268
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