h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hi there, as yet nameless researcher, and welcome to H2G2! My name is Gw7en (the "7" is silent) and I am one of the ACEs (Assitant Community Editors). We are here to greet folks and lend a hand where needed, so if you have any questions, please feel free to ask.

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G7

You now have a name, so Hello Paul!

G7

*looks confused*
Who's Paul? What...

*grins hello*
Y'know on your list of things you dislike I notice two things you don't mention. The first being jelly and the second being mailshots thus here is a mailshot for jelly...Well to be precise the Ministry Of Jelly which has just opened today and as such this is the first mailshot I've written which is why it's not particularly useful... errr...
*tries to remember what else mailshots need*
Ummm...it has pretty pictures?
*hopes she gets better at this as time passes*
Anyway, if you'd like to be the first person to respond to the first Ministry Of Jelly mailshot then feel free to visit http://www.h2g2.com/A461152 at any time...
*decides she doesn't like mailshotting as it's not very subtle*
...not that you have to of course, I just thought you might like to but you're under no obligation...
*crosses salesman off her list of potential jobs*
Hmm

Hi Tinkerbell (Grinning happily and waving a Ferrari flag in an over-excited fashion),

Or can I just call you Tinkerbell? Or failing that, Ms. Fashion)?

Confusion: I was called Paul, but now I'm Stretchy. My limited imagination struggled a bit for a nickname, but I thought I should come up with something better than Paul. Or at least different from Paul.

Actually, I like jelly.

Hmm... not sure about that Smiley now - it looks like it's leering rather unpleasantly. It's supposed to be thinking of jelly, and going 'Mmmmm... jelly...'

See you at the Ministry.

Peace,

Stretchy.

Hell
*makes mental note that it's time to change her name back*
I think Tinkerbell well do...although quite where you get Ms fashion from I'm not sure, it's definitely not the Ferrari flag as that's still covered in mud from Silverstone

*laughs*
I never actually considered that it could be a leery smiley but now you mention it...
I think the best smiley would be, mmmm jelly

Oh and just out of interest my mailshotting skills have been questioned by the President in case they provide too much confusion so I was just wondering on a scale of 1-10 (ten being completely bewildering) where abouts my mailshot rated?
*grins*
Thanks

Hi again,

I was assuming that if your full name was "Tinkerbell (Grinning happily and waving a Ferrari flag in an over-excited fashion)", then your surname would be the last word of your full name, i.e. "fashion)".

Maybe I've been eating too many of the happy pastilles you gave me (thanks for those, by the way).

Mailshotting skills...I'm not much of a judge really, but since I visited the Ministry after reading your mailshot, it obviously worked! The mailshot was sort of puzzling, or should that be tantalising (a vital skill in advertising, so I'm told)?

On a scale of 1-10, I think your mailshot definitely rates somewhere between 1 and 10.

*waves and looks enlightened*
Aaaah...sorry that's just me being a bit dense I'm alleged to be getting rid of the last bit as it's four weeks out of date now but I foolishly agreed to let someone else pick the bracketted part so I'm now waiting on a decision...not that I'm likely to listen to them but it's always polite to pretend

I think tantalising will go down better than puzzling with Peregrin (the president here)...maybe I should perfect my skills a little Although I have now mailshotted four people (which is fairly feeble considering I've been appointed for several weeks now ) and all of them have turned up...admittedly I know three of them so they may not be the best sample...

*looks relieved that it didn't register below 0*
Thankyou

Ah, I was just wondering where Stretchy had turned up from. Why not come and visit the Clanger Planet Embassy, too, although there's not much there apart from free soup: http://www.h2g2.com/A463196