h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I think she uses that spare hour for travelling, bathing and eating!
You're right, it's no way to live!

I think you had the better part of the deal with the writing and reading. You have gained a creative streak that is hard to pick up through watching a screen. There are people who sadly live their lives through programmes and movies and actually incorporate that fantasy into their reality.

New York will be hot! But there is air con!

Your friend Jan seems to have exactly the right idea about travelling. That's the way to see the world!

I'm not sure what there is in Edinburgh apart from the major landmarks.

I've never had a cat of my own, but we had a family cat when I was a nipper. The neighbours have one that seems to regard my house as part of it's domain. I had the windows open last weekend and it just wandered in and parked itself on the couch. Incredible animals.

Hmmm...stick insects. God, that's tempting....

I think, on the whole, I did - what I had in my head couldn't be used against me because I kept quiet about it!

I got force fed into playing the piano, too - I *think* had I been let alone to experiment rather than being made to play what was in front of me I could have become a fair muscian , too. As it is, I'm a reasenable technician, which is a totally different kettle of fish. Or I would be, once I've re read all the theory I've forgotten.

I blossomed later on in life with the theatricals - you can get away with murder if its in the name of art and entertainment, believe me - and its damned good fun, too!

When I was first in Eire, I actually got paid to STAY in the bar to sing a few times! Not often, granted, but it did happen. I don't know if I'd have the neck to do that, now - or frankly, the ability. Most things sound good after a few pints, so its an unreliable indication of how good or otherwise I was - but I had volume, anyway.

I'll ask June (another friend, I have lots of J-named ladies) about Edinburgh - she visited a few weeks ago, and she's really good at finding interesting places that arn't in tourist guides. Oh- btw, think you're on a hiding to naught with alpha getting to tell you his job - getting info out of him is like getting blood out of a stone Being incurably nosey I would like to find out though! I think its all part of the persona he's chosen to portray. Me? I just stick with being me; anything else is way too complicated.

Sounds to me you've got the cat residency sorted if the neighbour's one has adopted you. I love cats; when I was little I wanted to be one when I grew up. They've got such a wonderful sense of "sod you" independence. You could always keep the stick insects as entertainment for it, I suppose! If you get the opportunity -and indeed, should you want to, whizzle over to my page and read "Santy and the Magic Cats" which I wrote for my two lads, because Spike had died just before Christmas that year, and they were just a little too young to understand death properly.

That Christmas, I'd found two teddy cats, one grey and one ginger, and left them on the bottom of the bed, telling them that the kittens who fell asleep during the delivery of Christmas presents turned into toys if little boys had been particualy good that year.

They're 18 and nearly 17 now... and they STILL have Magic Cat presents. I thought they'd have grown out of them, but I have a horrible feeling I've instigated a famillly tradition which is going to cost me a small fortune when they start having their own kids!

With a bit of luck I shall have gone somewhere warm by then

The piano? Goodness. You are a veriatble mine of talent. Crikey!

To be honest, I've not a musical note in my body, though I really love music in general.

Ah, the theatre. I really don't get there enough. The last theatre I went to was in Milan. Sadly not La Scala, which was still being renovated.

Here's a beer (or three)...how about a few tunes???


Thanks for the thought about asking your friend about Edinburgh. Any information would be gratefully received.

You may be right about Mr Alpha...I get the strangest feeling I know him from somewhere. I can't quite place it. Do you get the feeling he is being outright duplicitous? Or just exceptionally secretive? Either might explain why his personal space stands empty.

Magic Cats! That's brilliant!!!! That's had me in stitches all morning.

Let's hope that tradition does continue as it's a happy one!!!

What was it that Pratchet said about folk singing? A long drawn out chord which gives the bystanders a sporting chance of getting away quick?

And wasn't it Spike Milligan who coined the phrase "The Irish tenor known and hated throughout the world"?

Not really talented, just lots of interests; its appropriate really, that my name is Jill - a jill of all trades and misstress of none, really. I amn't so much musical as just liking music - classics, some classical, jazz, rock, and even English Folk. I think I was lucky to grow up in the 60s and 70s because whatever the kids might think, I was spoiled for choice for songs that stand the test of time. Wrinkled and dissipated he may be, but Mr Jagger *still* has a lot going for him

But it looks damned good on a CV, doesn't it!

I'm glad you liked my Magic Cats - its the only kids story I ever attempted, but the lads big as they are,still seem to like it!

I cannent make Alpha out - I'm not sure if he's overly secretive or what. I *can* see he talks only to lady members, and really does seem to dislike it if another male joins in -being an inveterate lurker I read a lot. (I'm assuming you're male? Not being smart, but the conversation is good, and thats all that matters. And obviously, if I know a person's gender it can steer me clear of hopefully swapping make up hints with a bloke - although, having said that, it was a Rent Boy in East Ham who actually gave me one of the best make up lessons I've ever had!) Having said that, when I was really poorly in April he was very kind and I appreciated the bit of support and the practical suggestions he made. I think he just has an intenet persona to live up to - which is a shame, because as you say, he sounds pretty well educated and being nosey, I'd like to get to know him as a person!

I'll be in touch with June next week, sometime, I think (shes off to France,today, and is in the middle of organising her annual 500 stall Community Fair, but if there's anywhere interesing to know about in Edinburgh, she'll be the lady to ask. She was a school headmisstress before she stopped working, so you can imagine how meticulous and thorough she is.

Better go now - having just checked my bank balance from the other page, it appears Familly Tax Credits arn't paying in, so it looks like I'm to do battle with burocracy today (My favourite occupation!) Just because one lad has turned 18, doesn't mean that the younger one doesn't need to be fed, either.

I LOVE Spike Miligan. I'm just reading a book of his called "It Ends With Magic". I picked it up in Camden, actually...

Hi there, Jill! I'm a J too. Jamie, actually.

Anyone who can play an instrument or creatively write is highly talented in my book. It's something I have never been able to do so so I am in awe. It looks bloody amazing on a CV (back to latin again!).

So..that's what Alpha Male is doing, eh...interesting. Then he must see me as some form of threat and is trying to brush me aside (including the rather transparent post about a text from you). Or we could be reading him totally wrong and he may just be playing hard to get...
Only chatting with women seems a dead giveaway, though.

Actually that rings a bell with me about recognition. It's an unshakeable feeling...

It's good that he was supportive of you. If it was all for genuinely philanthropic reasons then that says a lot about him as a person.

(Allows quick check). Yes I am indeed male. Though "Jamie" can be taken both ways (unlike myself).

Thanks again for speaking to your friend and good luck with the Family Tax Credits people. Bloody red tape!!!

Oooh - a Milligan book I've not heard of - that means a jaunt to the library for a look.

Having said that, I've done my daily allotted walk today, down to the engravers to pick up young Lochinvar's Zippo - he wanted a soppy message on it for his 18th, so after racking my brains a while I came up with something suitably sentimental! Also, wearing posh frock shoes last night, is playing puck with the back today (pride alas, has its pinch and I was buggered if I was wearing a nice dress with the usual flatties - I'd look like a short blancmange)

I don't think yer man an *was* actually being supportive or altruistic- which is what I'd like to raise with him. I rather mislike being utilised or being portrayed as anything or anyone I amn't! As young Tiffany would say, There will be a Reckoning - but I'd sooner not scrap in public. And an Alpha playing hard to get seems a bit of a contradiction in terms. Me? I'll just lurk a lot and read between the lines - and keep an open mind. I've noticed some of the others seem to recognise this bloke - but he's not done or said anything harmfull or hurtful to me, so I'll just accept the fact that he's got a persona to protect. I mean, really - do I actually *sound* as if I need anyone to fight my battles for me? (well... OK, a hand against the FTC people would be nice - I hate red tape, but generally speaking?)

Its a funny place, here - there *is* a remarkable sense of community and whether its nosiness or not, there's a lot of keeping ones eyes open for others. I've been here on and off since 2003,and there were all sorts of dramas before I arrived (the 2 facts are not inter related, I assure you!)

Creativity is all very well, Jamie, but alas, unless you've got an ounce of business sense or self promotory features then it doesn't buy the supper very often. It passes the time, yes,(and used to be a regular income of Smithwicks) and I'm seldom bored, but...! I'd trade in the ability to write for a sound grounding in business and career sense sometimes, I would really. I never understood office politics, ever, and as a result, never got promoted, either. But I slept well of a night.

If the library don't have a copy, there are many available on amazon.co.uk. Some are available for as little as 1p!! There'll be P&P on top of that, naturally.

So, you think there is a possibility that said man was looking on here for females to pester? Sort of like speed dating only without the hefty fee?

What a wily devil if that's true.

I think you can more than take care of yourself. After all, you can't raise two boys and be a pushover!

I believe you about your arrival and the dramas! What sort of dramas were they? Pitched battles?

It seems to me you are right on the money about office politics. There is far too much of that nonsense going on and it only serves to cloud the issue and the conscience.

Whether you made money or not, Jill, you have that ability and I will be forever in awe of all creative people.

I had the honour of meeting Terry P once at a book signing. I was actually selling the Big Issue outside and he came up afterwards and bought a copy! Talk about being star struck! By the end of our brief chat I came away with the impression that he was a caring and talented man. His lasting impression of me was doubtless one of a jabbering mental patient.

You're right about Mr P - he IS a very caring bloke - and I doubt he judged you as a mental patient, jabbering, or otherwise either! You may yet recognise yourself in a cameo role in future novels, though! I once met a Craft Fayre stall holder who was the role for Big Grandad.. and Dr John Moss paid an extrodinary amount at a Clarecraft Day to Terry's Orangutang Fund to be immortalised as Mossy Lawn... (useless fact number 492)

Frankly, I'd doubt he judges anyone... I never had the joy of meeting him... but when they were smaller, both lads wrote to him - in the post, a few weeks later, came a signed photo of The Man himself, PLUS a letter written to each lad - and not a "standard" letter, either.


Years later, I was so impressed by Night Watch I actually wrote a fan letter - something I never ever thought I would do. I thought no more of it. Some time later, I too got an "indivudual" letter from him, acknowledging my appreciation. (No photo, though, in my case!)

So he *is* a nice person. And he' got talent hanging out of his ears, as well!

I'll check out Amazon and Mr M's book. I love his pomes - not the kids ones, but his Small Dreams of a Scorpion is one of the best volumes I've ever read. It was dear old Spike and Roger McGough, a liverpudlian "new" poet that really caught my imagination, but I'm far too lazy to do "in the style of"s except for a bit of academic fun.

And before you ask, they're absolutely dreadful!

As to the other matter, I shall do a Granny Weatherwax and see what I shall see. There's a possibility I may be overly suspicious/cynical -and an equal posibility I'm not.

not too sure about not being a pushover when it comes to the lads, anyway! The point IS I keep on getting back up!

The Irish always did say its hard to kill a bad thing!

Now you have me worried that I'm going to appear in print. I wonder if the Beggars Guild will beckon.

Sad news about London again. Thank goodness there was not more bloodshed.

Hope you are well this morning and sufficiently rested.

You're right - the whole thing is dreadful - why on earth do people DO this stuff?

Won't be in much atall today - familly emergency began last night and is still on going - so, alas, no, I amn't rested atall this morning/afternoon.

Normal service will be resumed, etc etc

Hey, if it's family you have to do it. I hope it all works out ok.

God knows why people do that stuff. There's obviously something very wrong with them. I'm just glad the damage was far less this time.

As we discussed the other day about office politics, there are all sort of reasons why people do things. Sometimes just to appear superior, and other times just to hurt. One of the American bosses has really cracked down on it and said enough is enough. There was lots of it going on in the last convention. I think it boiled down to two managers basically setting their staff on each other in order to play some elaborate game of chess.

There are some very manipulative people out there who will lie to you and get you to believe almost anything for their own ends. Even if it means you disregarding common sense and what you can see with your own eyes, you can still fall for it.

Maybe these bombers have fallen for that old chestnut. Who knows?

Anyway, I hope your family emergency resolves in a way that is beneficial and productive.

Hope to talk soon.

PS I found out this morning that Scotty from Star Trek had died the other day. Big shame, he seemed a nice man.

Hi there. Just popping on to let you know that I hope your family troubles are either sorted or well on the way to being so.

On the subject of the bombers, it looks like the police are doing great work in hunting them down. It's just a shame about that poor Brazillian chap. It just goes to show there are always innocent casualties on either side.

As for myself, well, I picked up a rather nasty bout of sickness over the weekend. Self inflicted through alcohol, actually. We went to a place called "Empire" near the station. I'd been past it many times and wondered why I had never gone in. Now I understand why. It was chock full of kids!!! So, after drowning myself in mildly expensive fizzy booze I spent most of Saturday in bed feeling miserable as sin, and had a fuzzy head all day Sunday! I was still fairly jittery on Monday, too.

Not quite Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster style, but pretty close.

As the saying goes...never again.

Anyway, hope things are well with you.