h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

While shopping today I was apprehended for the second time by the store detective. I was absolutely innocent, I hasten to add, but they're only doing their job. So if you can be bothered, here are the two stories.

The only shopping I ever do is on Saturdays for the family's food and maybe a little treat for myself. I spend around 200 euros each time and have done so at the same shop for a few years now.

Once when I was passing the barrier after the till, the sensors bleeped. The cashier and I went through and checked every likely item in my trolley and in the end we gave up, and she said that did happen sometimes and let me go.

The following week it bleeped again.

I looked, among other places, in my handbag and discovered a small packet of batteries which I then realised I had dropped into my bag instead of into the trolley the week before and that must have been what had set the bleeper off the previous week. I keep the batteries in my handbag because there is practically nowhere in the house I can put them that the kids won't get to them before I do. However, they should have been de-magnetised or whatever it is they do to them.

The cashier seemed to believe my story, but had to call the detective, which I quite understood. In the end the detective called the manager, who, in the light of my over-full trolley, let me off. It was still an experience which left me shaking for a bit.

So today I had another encounter with the store detectives. For several months now I have been carrying an empty make up compact in my handbag, trying to find a replacement for it. Today I looked, and found exactly what I wanted. On checking out, I had to wait ages because I had picked up a special offer "en passant" which failed to show up a price on the till. A girl went off to find the price and sort it out. After waiting ages and no girl came back, I went over to the information desk, where I continued to wait. While waiting I had time to notice a chappie standing around and even thought to myself "Why doesn't he go in and help his wife with the shopping instead of waiting out here behind the tills for her"

After standing at the information desk for a while, I noticed the item I had bought (it had been laying there all the time!) and told the lady that that was mine and paid for it and was ready to leave. The guy who'd been "loitering" then came up to me and presented his ID and asked me to come into the office with him and his colleague. I had no idea what they thought I'd done this time, and was quite happy to demonstrate the contents of my handbag to them.

It turned out that I'd been seen dropping my old compact into my bag after comparing it with the new one (which had been duly paid for) and they let me off. The one said, "my colleague owes you an apology" but I never got the apology.

Of course, while I had the attention of the entire security team, my friends had cleared the cosmetics, electronic and hard booze departments !! (no - only joking!!!)

As I say, they were only doing their job. But I wish they wouldn't pick on me - who spends nearly 1000 euros per month at their shop and never nicked anything in her life.

Well, except the odd loo roll from the office when I was a struggling single flat-sharing girl, working for a hundred pounds a month in a Dickensian solicitor's office.

Well, I'm glad I got that off me chest.. Oooh - what's this hidden in my bra?

I was walking around for years with a purse (bought and paid for, full of the usual rubbishy bits of paper) which still had the magnetic barcode hidden side (don't know why, it only cost about DM 20)

For years I would go in a shop and set the bleepers off - nobody ever checked.

Several dozen times I would set off the alarms in the Kaufhof in Krefeld and nobody ever checked me.

Then one day in Sittard, I was with my daughter (about 8 months old) going into a toyshop, set off the alarm and got pulled over. They went through everything minutely and wouldn't let me in until I could stop beeping. The shop girl found the offending barcode and since then I'Ve been clear.

But I often wonder at the shops which never reacted to my apparent shoplifting.

When in Menorca recently I and my family got followed round the discount leather warehouse by a woman who straightened everything we touched, and generally hovered behind us around the store.

Eventually I turned round and said 'Do you have a problem ?'

'Can I help you ?' she replied.

'Yes,' I said, 'you can stop folowing me round the store.'

She didn't, so left without making the purchase I had in mind.


Anyway must check what TC has in her bra

I have a similar story to tell:
Some friends of mine went to our neighbourhood supermarket to buy some food for our dinner. Although they are not entirely blind they have a very bad eyesight and thus have to hold the boxes etc. very close to their eyes to read content tables and so on.

Through the store detectives camera it must have looked like attempted robbery. they pulled them out in a rude manner. even after they had explained their situation, the detectives kept beeing very rude and unpolite and did not apologize.

This is my story, just wanted to share it

I always get pulled over for extra searches at airports, even if I don't set the scanners off I must look like a terrorist...

Maybe its the way you bat your eyelashes at the security guards

I must watch that- I'll try walking arund with my eyes shut. Mind you, with my luck they'd get up pulled up on suspicion of being a drug dealer...

I've never been pulled over - I sometimes go through a checkpoint and beep - I always go back inside and ask someone why I've beeped. On a couple of occasions, it's been a library book!

TC! Not a pleasant experience, though.

KerrAvon, yes it has to do with terrorism: they always try to take out the bombshells

Why thank you dear