h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I love being the center of attention! Its being in the center of attention that bothers me

I know - I used to hate those classes in school, but then I had to teach.

What'd you teach?

English as a foreign language, German, Latin, occasionally, and the Great Books Seminar.

English is a foreign language?!


Just joking!

I taught English in Germany, Greece and North Carolina - but in North Carolina, the natives probably needed it more than the immigrants!

"Hey paw! That new fangled teacher thing is commin to our dwoor and trying to say we done speak the language wrong!"

The Vietnamese students: 'You not teach us right English. You not teach us ain't.' No lie.

They probably watch too much American tv.

No, they never had time, though their kids did (I taught them, too). They worked 10-12-hour shifts in the cotton mills, and learned their English off the locals.

One time, I was showing them how to work the copy machine, and I said, push the button - they looked blank. I said, press the button - they looked blank. I thought. I said, mash me that button - they did!

Don't they say that in Florida? 'Mash the button'?

I wouldn't know.

?

Not yet. But I'm so groggy...let's see...I posted a poem in my journal, wrote that guide entry that queen inspired by ranting about pirates...oh yeah...you gave me an inspiration the other day, and I've got to write about it...