h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Why is it that there's a stereotype of bars in Camden (eg. Camden Underworld) being full of drunk people dancing around to 'Parklife' by Blur and you think 'aha, what a merry jape, bet they're not like that really', then you actually go there AND THEY ARE.

hmmmm, well the stereotype had to come from somewhere i guess. pluss it's fun jumping around to parklife, provided you've consumed enough alcohol to be able to think you're surrounded by 8 people called dave who all look the same for some reason

scruff X

i suppose. some guy came up to us and asked us at length if we were enjoying our t-shirts, then asked us if either of us would swap with him as he wasn't enjoying his t-shirt cos he had a terrible rash under his arms. and another guy asked my mate philly if she had a tattoo on her hand (it was an ink doodle of a star) and when she said no, it was just a drawing, he said "well, anybody that can whip out an HB pencil and draw something as good as that on their hand is clearly very creative and artistic and i like that in a girl". but you can't draw on your hand with a pencil...

all that was completely pointless and bears no relation to anything interesting whatsoever but it's always on my mind

wow what a coincidence HB is my favourite type of pencil.

scruff X

i like 4B myself but thats only cos i prefer drawing with pencils to writing with pencils. writing is the job of biros.

and of people who can be bothere to keep track of them. is there such a thing as a person who always knows where their biro is?

scruff X

no. i personally belive that all biros are constantly on the lookout for means of escape and take the opportunity whenever it presents itself. they then go to live in another dimension where biros can all be free and happy. cigarette lighters may also be involved in this since they always bloody disappear as well.
Just a thought...

and also plectrums and left socks.

scruff X

ah! yes to the plectrums. but because i have an anal retentive mother (who does my washing) my socks are always tied together in pairs so i always have both. they're also dead jazzy anyway so it'd be hard to lose them.

god damn people who have mothers who tidy stuff, my mother never tidied for me, she'd walk into my room, look around, cry and walk back out again. anyway i didn't want her touching my collection cigarette buts piled neatly on the window sill in a statement against conformity....and because i couldn't be bothered to find an ash tray.

scruff X

if my mum found out i smoked she'd have an embolism. i mean, jeez, i'm nineteen, but still. and if i smoked IN THE HOUSE she'd saw my head off. she goes through my stuff. last week she yelled at me cos my jeans were in the wardrobe, neatly hung up but FACING THE WRONG WAY. all the zips have to face the right, and all my jackets have to face the left. and the hangers all have to be the same way round, not just by twisting the hook, but actually properly the right way round. i mean, they're in WARDROBE goddammit, there's a door hiding them from view. its not like the wardrobe inspectors are going to come round and arrest her. and in my mum's terms, my room is a mess if there is one cd case from the cd WHICH I AM LISTENING TO AT THE TIME on the floor. she combs the tassels on the curtains. she makes a point of fixing the way my computer monitor is facing every time she comes in so that it is at an exact 45 degree angle form the edge of the desk.

SHE BORROWS MY CLOTHES WITHOUT ASKING. SHE READS MY MAIL. i'm surprised i cope.

is that a mother or a robot??? my mam knew i smoked from the age of 14, i didn't even smoke tobacco until i was 16 at 16 she used to come in my room and beg for tobacco when she'd run out, now we have drinking competitions and play knock door run on the way home from the pub. last time i went to visit we drank a bottle of southern comfort between us and had to help each other up the stairs because neither of us could see straight. and it never did me any harm. i'm ain't an alcomoholic i don't do no hard drugs and i got me loads of distinctions in my btec and now i'm in unimeversity. tell u'r mam to let you have u'r hangers the wrong way dammit!

scruff X

i try, i try.
ah southern comfort. those were the days. unfortunately i cannot drink it anymore, thanks to john + jimmy, who'd buy a pint of lemonade, empty a bit out, fill it with sc so it looked the same colour as a normal pint then make me down it before every celtic lecture. also one night i had 18 at the 13th note, threw up on the barman and got banned. but the club closed down 6 months later so hah! i won. but the smell of sc makes my stomach sick... jack daniels is much better for my constitution now.