h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

That essay is proof of the superiority of h2g2 to all other websites.

According to the Hellmann's website, it was a case of substitution caused by lack of a key ingredient. A chef who wanted to celebrate a military victory with a ream-based sauce found that no cream was available, so he substituted eggs.

http://www.hellmanns.com/home/about

Yeah, that sounds like propaganda meant to obfuscate the truth.

You just don't accidentally get those ingredients to mix like that, especially when you're short on time as I would expect such a chef to be.

The chips/mayo discussion needs more elucidation, I think.

Chips as we have them in England (and probably the rest of the UK and Ireland I'd guess) are cut fatter so you have a larger surface area in the first place, and a definitely lower ratio of surface area to inside potato, IYSWIM? They should be crisp-ish on the outside, but soft-ish inside. This works very well with vinegar and salt (or Henderson's Relish if you're from Sheffield and salt)

Pommes in Belgium (and fries pretty much everywhere) are thinner giving a bigger surface to inside ratio, and are crispier. This works extremely well with firmer sauces but not at all with vinegar.

And back to TC: Knokke-Heist!!! It's like some kind of Hole-in-the-Wall gang name or something.

"You just don't accidentally get those ingredients to mix like that, especially when you're short on time as I would expect such a chef to be." [Baron Grim]

That may be so. I don't know the full extent of what chefs do, so I can't be certain. Hollandaise sauce is fairly similar -- egg yolks, lemon juice, butter -- so a good chef might know something about the properties of egg yolks and the requirements for making them blend properly.

I can see your engineering background coming out there, Sho. Well said!

It's a very popular resort!

http://www.google.com/maps/place/Knokke-Heist,+Belgium/@51.3322097,3.0252508,10z/data=!4m2!3m1!1s0x47c350b488de50eb:0xfff6c3d524fde781

I have made a great study of chips in the past. I'm from Yorkshire - I won't eat just any ol' thing

(I was thinking of this convo on Saturday, watching the England/Ireland rugby, as I was, in an Irish pub. The chips were too thin - we were all eating Fish & Chips, because since we were introducing our German friends to Rugby we thought we'd get them all to drink and eat the food of the gods at the same time. They were all F&C virgins!)

Chips should be about 1cm wide.

I bet there's an EU Chip Size Directive.

"I don't vant soggy chips - zey must be crisp und braun"

well there's your reason for Brexit right there.

I'm now in the out camp. (that was easy)

Sho's description of fat-cut chips is ever so slightly self-contradictory: "a larger surface area in the first place, and a definitely lower ratio of surface area to inside potato".

Still, we see what she means: a larger surface area than a whole or half potato, but not as large as fine-cut chips.

I once had game chips in a Dublin restaurant (Jammet's); they were just like matchsticks--all surface (equally contradictory but you know what I mean) and crisp right through

nono. The chips are the same length as the skinny ones, but they are fatter. So compared to Fries a Chip has a larger surface area.

but when you compare the outer/inner ratios of a Fry with a Chip you see that the ratio is very different due to the thickness of a chip.

Those Jammet's "chips" sound.. bleurgh

They sound like what I know of as "shoestring potatoes"; skinny, crispy potato sticks. You can buy them in a can.

http://www.google.com/search?q=shoestring+potatoes&biw=1681&bih=1288&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&sqi=2&ved=0ahUKEwj8nfP8kJ3LAhWCST4KHVIlCdcQ_AUIBygC

My doctors have been warning me away from fried foods for about thirty years. That means very little exposure to French fries, fried chicken, veal parmesan, etc. I would sometimes cheat and have an egg roll now and then. Fried eggs? I boil eggs instead. Apparently it's okay to eat eggs now, because dietary intake of cholesterol doesn't affect your serum cholesterol as much as the powers that be originally thought. Who knows what the official verdict on cholesterol will be 50 years from now?

Yeah, my doctor has warned me more about carbs rather than fat regarding cholesterol and my elevated triglycerides.

Limiting carbs was the only way I was able to lose any weight.

Due to my doctor's poor handwriting, I avoided eating crabs for the last two years.

Hopefully, crabs were also warned not to eat *you*.