Lucid Insanity

I used to be in what I thought was control of my life. Then one day, as I was minding my own business a friend gave me a huge black book to read entitled "The Complete Hitch-Hickers Guide to the Galaxy" by Douglas Adams. I recognized it from a TV show I'd seen several years ago and a text based adventure game with the same title ( well, not exactly the same title, but close, actually, mostly the same title, well, the same title, with out the word "complete" ) I remembered how funny the game was and I was pretty sure the show at least made me smile.

Needless to say, I took the book and read it from front to back. How can you not, it MAKES you. You can't put it down, at least not for a long period of time, like 4 minutes. (I think that is part of it's internal programming, I haven't tested it yet, but I think after that initial 4 minute period of being idle the book will read its self to you) I read the book mostly at work, since that is mostly were I am. I would laugh uncontrolably and a co-worked would ask "What's so damn funny?", "This book, here listen to this...." and I would read back the part which was so amusing........... No response.... "Well, I guess you'd have to read the whole thing" I'd sit and think to myself "I am I crazy? This this not suppposed to be funny? Am I a higher intellectual being that only I can find the humor and irony? Is it one of those things that you just can't explain like "You'd have to have been there". I got to the last page and scoured through the book like a junkie having withdrawls, looking for more, there HAD TO BE MORE. Some thing like this can't END. I found my self reading the copyright page, turning the book upside down and reading it backwords (which was quite difficult, I don't recommend it) looking for the clue that would lead me to something else.

I finally pulled my self together and put the book away. I was frustrated that the life around me didn't coincide with the life in the book. So, I went to return the book to my dear friend that lent it to me, and I bludgend her to death with it, very tragic, and very messy I might add. I stood there yelling at her for showing this to me and for keeping it from me. How did I manage life this long without it? How can I ever step on another bug without fear it will come back to haunt me? How can I leave my house again without peanuts and my towel? How do I MISS THE GROUND!! I got along fine for many, many years without a pocket full of peanuts, and all these bruises from failed attempts at failing from failing to hit the ground. Questions I had plenty of time to ask myself after the police took me away, but that's a long boring story of it's own.

It's not just the book, it's the Author also. I'm convinced he is an alien bent on world domination. He has made us love him and his work. He has made us buy animal picture books(Last chance to see), which most of us would have never bought and we LIKED it.

Friends, we must stick together, because whether or not we want to be here. We have a job to do. We must do our part as puppets in the Hitch-Hickers Guide to the Galaxy life-style to complete H2G2.

Thank you and I'm sorry,
So long and thanks for all the Liffs.
U148200
Reporting and closing.

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