h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

wow, me might cross paths. i'll be sure to look out for people in the river and anyone handing out icecream.
i like pictures. i had a literally some doodles on and around my old folders but most of them have been replaced because they were a bit rubbish. i have this good one though that's done on one of those card backs that come on pads of paper. it's like an hour glass but the bits are round and the top one is the earth and it shows all the greenery and life and goodness draining away into the bottom. it's a little bit deep but i don't really know where the inspiration for it came from.
and yes, the vicar of dibley is great.
there's a guy here who only has 3 but they're all on the same day. it's nasty.
you friends sound wonderful! that would be so much fun to see. i'd probably end up being to one so shout that at you.
i haven't spent much time revising today. had the first hockey match of the season and we lost but it was good fun. cut myself on the lip shaving afterwards though so now i can't open my mouth properly and i'm hungry.
late for registration! bye!

I'm not likely to be in any rivers or handing out ice-cream if my mum's going to be there. Something tells me she wouldn't appreciate it. I've just remembered Oxford is where the Eagle and Child is and where CS Lewis and Tolkien were, so that's quite exciting. I can't think why I didn't think of it before.
Your hourglass picture sounds cool. Most of mine are copied from textbooks (that's why I have so many of Hitler, it really freaked someone out when she was flipping through my file). When the textbook doesn't have pictures I do lettering, like titles and stuff. All my teachers crack up because I draw while they're talking, but I can listen and draw at the same time. I can multitask!
I think my friends are great too, although some people in the year think we're weird. But I can live with that.
I've reread this sentence several times and have no idea what it means: "i'd probably end up being to one so shout that at you". I'm probably being really stupid.
I had to play hockey in first to third year. They put me on the team once as a last resort, but took me off pretty quickly. Now I do powerwalking in games, which is the biggest skive ever. You walk around the town and that's it. It's no joke in winter though, it's absolutely freezing and they make you wear skirts for as long as they can get away with it, just to punish you for being so lazy. All the P.E teachers hate powerwalkers.

powerwalking as a school sport? oh that is wonderful. gave me s right chuckle that did.
hey yeah i forgot about the eagle and child. maybe if we're there at the same time you can show it to me. so far i don't know which day i'm going on, i need to sort it out with the other girl who's on the open day. the cool think is that she's welsh so if we see you there we'll have a whole multi-racial (ish) thing going on. how pollitically correct are we?
multitasking is for girls because guys normally can't do it, although during my 'revision' on the weekend i learnt that i can colour stuff in whilst listening to music and eat brownies.
have you heard of Calligraphy? it's like the art of lettering properly. like with proper old pens and old fashioned writing styles. i got a set years ago from my grandma but i don't think i ever used it much. there have been some adverts about it recently and you talking about lettering reminded me.
as long as you and your friends get on you don't need to worry about what others think.
i was in such a good mood yesterday. i was in our 6th form common room and you've been framed was on which was really funny because they had these skiing wipeout videos () and funny animals and babies and stuff, and when that finished Grease came on which has to be the best sing along musical ever for people our age. most people left but i stayed with a few others and we had a great time.
still can't get over the powerwalking thing. at the moment i'm doing hockey competitively and swimming mid-week as training for next term wheni swim competitively. it's really hard most of the time and i'm not looking forward to the first session but it's worth it because after a session when you're so tired you can't get out of the pool you get this tremendously self satisfied feeling. and hopefully i'll be able to lose my christmas weight as well. (put on a few pounds over the holls.)

I see powerwalking as my protest against not being allowed to play badminton or table-tennis in games. They're the only two sports I enjoy, and they only let team members play. And our teams are both Ulster champions so there's no way I could get into the team. So I powerwalk, to annoy the P.E staff.
I don't know what day we're going on yet. Though I don't think we'd be that multi-racial. Once I was talking about one of these cross-community events the government loves to give us over here, and I said it was going to be multi-sectarian. Which apparently means you hate everyone, so people called me a multi-sectarian for months.
Yeah, I have a calligraphy set somewhere. I used to be into it when I was a kid, I got a really nice wooden pen in France. Haven't seen it for about seven years though.
You've Been Framed is funny, in a sick sort of way. Like laughing at small children hurting themselves. I've never seen Grease, but when I was in Guides we sang the song from it for our display and did some kind of dance routine.
I really should do more exercise. But I can never really be bothered. I started doing sit-ups every day in the summer, but that kind of ended once school started. Maybe I'll start cycling or something.
Anyway, I'd really better go cos my German presentation is in for tomorrow and I haven't started it yet. It's on a famous German cultural figure so I'll probably do Beethoven or someone. I suggested Hitler, but that wasn't appreciated.

they have a table tennis team? i bet they're chinese! all the people here who do it are chinese.
we haven't arranged what day to go on but i spoke to the other girl and i think we're both deffinately going now, we just need to arrange the whole thing with the teacher who's in charge of this stuff.
yeah i was stretching the meaning of multi-racial a little bit. we're all british so it a way we're all the same race anyway.
i'm trying to type and listen to someone talkkk about touch typing at the same time. i just got busted. (that wasn't bad was it.)
you've been framed is well funny! it's about funny children being innocent and not knowing that hundreds of people are watching them. and animals doing funny things like beating up aforesaid children.
i had a 2 day phase of sit ups and stuff and a stint at the gymn in the summer but that ran out.
i can't concentrate on this right now so i'll right more next time. we're t-alking about teachers and discos and i have someones feet on my knees so i'm at a weird typing angle.
also hitler was a bit of a silly idea, even for you.
and you didn't notice my little in the last posting.

No, we only have one Chinese guy at our school, and I think he plays rugby. The head boy a few years ago was Chinese and he played table tennis though. There's only one black guy in school as well, we're not very multi-racial. Unless you count Scottish people as a different race, there are quite a few of them.
Actually, I suppose you could say we are different races because you'd be Norman or Anglo-Saxon or something and I'd be Celtic. Just because I think Celtic sounds cool. (And not the football club.)
So far only me and one other girl have put our names down so we should both get to go if no-one else signs up. Yay!
I haven't got any videos done yet but I got an enthusiastic volunteer for the 'Hug Me' sign. We're wondering if supergluing a pound to the floor outside the staff room might be a bit dangerous, because it's at the top of the flight of stairs and someone might fall over it. Anyway if I can convince my dad to let me borrow our video camera (his pride and joy) I'll bring it in tomorrow and do some video.
It's a ski smiley! But I'm not going to use one again until it snows. Which had better be soon, we're due a snow day by now. Last year it snowed during the mocks and only about ten people got into school for the R.E exam but they made us do it anyway. But it was OK because we all got the next day off while everyone else did it. Hooray!
When I suggested Hitler I wasn't even thinking, 'Hitler', as in 'mad evil mass-murderer guy', I was just thinking, 'Ha, I can copy all this from my history notes!' But then I remembered Hitler's generally a bad idea.
Before remembrance day our German language assistant kept going on about the war and how guilty she felt for being German. It was quite awkward sitting in a classroom with her, trying to convince her no-one blamed her for the war.
I now have three sentences of my presentation written. I'll put them up so you can admire them:
"Ludwig van Beethoven war ein deutscher Komponist. Er ist im Jahr 1770 geboren. Sein Vater war Alkoholiker und hat ihn oft geschlagen."
And now I can't think of anything else to write.

you have a Chinese guy who plays rugby? none of the ones here do. is herealy chinese? i bet he isn't, he's probably korean or something because they can get quite stressy in rugby.
we have 2 black guys now and they're both in my year. had quite a few a while ago though. one of the black guys yesterday said something rather funny. he was talking to his sister who was in a car and he dropped something and shouts 'oh no i dropped my lip gloss'. imagine a large black guy saying that in a black guy sort of voice and you can imagine the amount of mirth that we experienced.
i have to go to a physics thing now so i will reply to the rest of your posting later.

He could be Korean I suppose, I don't really know. You never really think of Chinese people playing rubgy but that's probably racist or something. At an SU weekend I was on there was this black guy who was really hilarious, he was a bit of a geek really but he would put on the accent and everything and really play up the stereotype. He was great. Anyway I have to go too, I'm v. late and haven't even revised tonight. v

0h my god that was the most hectic ten minutes of my life! i was looking for the girl who i'm going to oxford with and i phoned her up to find her and she literally screams down the phone something about dracula and i thought she was genuinely being attacked or something and when i actually came face to face with her she's grinning like a mad woman and screaming about how she's lost her dracula book for the english exams. anyway during a little book searching, panicking and being repremanded for smiling too much i obtained the following information.
we are going for the friday 17th open day at oxford.
we are probably going to be staying the night somewhere there.
she doesn't think ice cream out of windows sounds like much fun.
we're either going to have to take the train (lord help us) or get her mum to take us one way and get the train anyway going the other way, only we don't know which way she can take us and owing to me being from jersey and her being from wales we don't know much about where oxford is or anything about how to get there.
we have a booking to stay over which we can use if we need to but it's there just in case because otherwise we won't be able to find a place to sleep.
that's all i know and i'm not going to go into the various questions i don't know the answers to because it will be literally some lines long and my wrists are hurting from typing at a bad angle.
see if you can come and stay over on thursday 16th too and we can all go clubbing. but don't worry if you can't come then. i'm sure we'll see each other at cambridge at some point.
...and not back to the rest of the posting...
i thought celtic was a welsh thing? shows what i know.
good luck with the video. sounds like you've got enough ideas for something seriously funny.
we missed out on the snow because it's all in the east over london and stuff. haven't seen anything but a few pathetic snow showers since the exeat weekend when it snowed bucket loads.
german people appoligising or british people repremanding them for not appologing. both rather annoying but it is possible to reach a happy medium. (rather random but that's the sort of mood i'm in right now.)
i'm doing house duty again tonight because the guy who is supposed to be doing it has all 3 of his modules on thursday and has loads of work planned. i said yes because i don't have a module tomorrow and i was being lazy in a way but i think i probably should have done a little more work. oh well there's always tomorrow afternoon which is mostly free for me anyway appart from my first swimming session. can't wait.
while i was writing that bit the teacher organising the oxford trip came and spoke to me about it and says he's doing the accomodation now. this might sound really silly but i thought it would have been a smart thing in suits and stuff but he says it's probably going to be a casual affair which is a big turn up. i think i'll be packing my hootoo t-shirt then.
(sorry for the large amount of oxfordness in this posting it's just on my mind right now and if i don't write it down somewhere it'll fall out again.)
nice german presentation. can't understand it but it looks pretty good. looks very german with all the g's, v's and k's.
good luck revision. sorry, with revision. yeah. anyway i'm off to my 2nd duty in 2 days. fun.

The German meant: ""Ludwig van Beethoven was a German composer. He was born in 1770. His father was an alcoholic and often beat him." But it's OK, I've decided to do Mozart instead because he was more interesting.
Celtic is kind of Scottish, Welsh and Irish. It's also a football team, but that's pronounced 'Seltic' instead of 'Keltic'. Americans usually mix up the two, and then we laugh at them. They come over to trace their ancestors and stuff, and buy tacky leprechaun souvenirs.
Don't know what house duty is, but I imagine you standing in a corridor and yelling at people for talking too loudly or something. That image is just in my mind because we were kicked out of our common room today for talking too loudly, and I'm annoyed about it. We had to slum it in the corridors with juniors! Or it could be like common room duty, which is where you're meant to pick up all the rubbish and arrange the tables for private study, but I've never, ever seen anyone do that.
About Oxford, I still don't know anything about it or even if we definitely have places. I think it's sort of west of London and north of Portsmouth. (OK, it would be hard not to be north of Portsmouth, but you get the idea.)
I got a grilling today about why I want to go to the Oxford thing from our VP, who is just about the most terrifying person I know. She knows absolutely everything about everyone, even if she's never taught them. I feel a bit scared typing this on my home computer, in case she's monitoring it.
I have a mental image of me saying to my mum, "Bye, I'm going clubbing with a guy I know from the Internet. I'm sure he's not a creepy stalker, but just in case, I'll keep my mobile on." Yes, something tells me that's not going to happen. Anyway I’m not into clubbing.
I'm glad it's not going to be formal because that means thin trousers with no pockets and uncomfortable boots. Although I got new boots for work experience which are actually comfortable enough, and the heel is pretty low so I can walk OK, without having my feet crushed. Plus, they smell of leather.
If I see someone in a hootoo T-shirt, I'll yell "GALIGAN!" at them. Chances are it'll be you.
EXAMS START TOMORROW AAAARGH!

i thought Beethoven was interesting enough. you know, what with being blind and everything. sorry, deaf. why didn't i just delete that? i don't know.
i knew it was pronounced 'keltic' but i didn't know it applied to all 3 countries. and i know about Celtic too but i don't follow football.
don't cha just love american gullability?
house duty is when you go around during prep time and make sure everyone is where they should be and then at junior bed time you go around and make sure they're all in their rooms and not making too much noise. i don't do the whole yelling thing much because people tend to laugh at me if i do. i guess i'm not a very good authority figure.
i found out where it is on a google map. we're going to have to go via reading which is further off near london to change trains and then come back again. fun. actually it might be because i don't go on trains very much.
hello Jo's VP. i'm not crazy, honest. and no i'm not one of those crazy internet weirdos you warn children about.
(is she gone? quick, run!)
when i say clubbing i normally mean walking around thinging of something to do, which can be quite an activity in itself. i don't think i'm really the clubbing type, especially with my hatred of discos and any scenario which requires you to look good whilst prancing around like a tw*t with lasers going off.
i've just realised that from my last posting when i said about clubbing you might have thought i am actually some creepy stalker trying to drug you up and have my wicked way (that is such a wonderful euphamism!). i'm not, just so you know. if you want proof phone up the taunton post office and ask them if there was a guy there from jersey who totally bodged up his driving licence application which is incedently now being sent back home when they issue is so my parents have to send it out here again. what fun.
chances are it'll be me but you never know. if i see someone shouting 'GALIGAN!' at someone who isn't me and then getting very embarassed i'll know it's you.
must dash, late for prep. bye!

Americans are hilarious. They really do believe in leprechauns and things. All the stuff you thought was a joke is actually true.
House duty sounds fun. If someone tried to do that here they'd be jumped, tied up and locked in a cupboard or something. You must be very civilised.
I can't remember the last time I was on a train (Cambridge trip excepted). I think it was on the way to an SU weekend about 3 years ago, there was this kid sitting opposite me and my friend and he kept kicking us and spitting on us. It wasn't a nice experience. When we were in Cambridge we sat for about three hours at a train station, waiting for a train that was late. All the stuff we thought was a joke about British trains is actually true.
I almost expected the VP to stop me in the corridor today and ask who you are. But she didn't. Phew.
I'm fairly sure you're not a creepy stalker. You're obviously in lower sixth because you knew about the Oxford trip before I did, and the only reason I can think about you lying about your school is if you're one of the guys in my school having a laugh. But none of ones who would do something like that have the imagination to think of making you up, so that's OK. Although that's probably not going to reassure my mum much.
Walking around and thinking of something to do is far more fun than going to discos or something. Particularly when it involves pretending you're German and asking random strangers for directions to Berlin, or standing in a group pointing at the roof of a building and yelling, "He's going to jump!" to see how many people whip out their camera phones and look wildly around. (Disappointingly few.)
My dad just came in and told me the VP phoned us today and I'm going to Oxford on Friday 17th! Yay!

i don't particularly like Americans but if i ever meet one i promise i'll re-evaluate my liking for them.
house duty isn't too bad. when they did it years ago the prefect was basically allowed to hurt anyone who didn't do what they were told and they can't do that now (shame) but most of the juniors just go with it. there's a teacher who goes around as well to tell them to shut up and stuff like that.
when you say kid was it young like below 10 or some 15 year old yobbo who was just acting really childishly? probably the first one but you never know these days.
i have this wonderful vision of on-time british trains that are comfortable and don't involve any awkwardness in my head. shows how long ago i went on a train. actually the last one i was on was probably the Eurostar which is quite nice.
nah, not a creepy stalker but i think i am one of those internet weirdos that mums warn their children about. (i saw something like that in a quote on someones personal space. it was a little different but i found it hillarious.)
"Although that's probably not going to reassure my mum much."
hee hee.
i love that thing about standing in front of a building and shouting "he's going to jump!" that's one of the funniest things i've heard in absolute yonks! i've got to try that one out one day. don't think i'd make a very convincing german but i did walk around with a russian military hat on once. one person i was with had a statue of liberly head thing and the other had a big hat that was like a glass of guinness. we kept a cranberry bacardi breezer in there for easy access. i think it's still there on his bedside table.
when i read that thing about the VP phoning you i thought it was something about what you'd said earlier about her asking you about me. i got really confused up until the point where you said about the oxford thing. guess i'll see you there then.

The kid was about five or so. The worst bit was that his mother was sitting beside him and didn't stop him. We couldn't move because the train was full, that's why we were in a different carriage to everyone else from SU. Eventually one of the teachers came to see if we were OK and when he found us being spat on and kicked he gave us different seats.
I haven't done the German thing but I have done the 'he's going to jump!' one. We debated pretending to be German and trying to buy a microwave in Primark one day in Belfast, but we decided to go to Starbucks instead. Then we got kicked out of Starbucks for 'abusing the furniture' because I was sitting on the arm of a chair.
I find it quite disturbing that the VP actually phoned our house. Now I'm afraid to pick up the phone.
Three exams down, three to go. Not too bad so far, although the German was about roller-skating priests so that was slightly odd to say the least.
Hey, I get to be on TV next week! I'm in the audience for some Northern Ireland politics show that no-one watches. It's quite exciting though.

that's rubbish discipline. if i had a kid who started spitting on people he's get a good slap from me. never did me any harm to have the occasional smack and it's very satisfying.
well maybe starbucks has tacky furniture that'll fall apart easily and they don't want you to fall off and sue them. some people are so fussy.
what does V stand for? is it Vice Principal?
how have you done 3 exams since the last time you posted? i've done 3 too but my first one was on tuesday. my next one's on tuesday as well and it's english so you know that one's going to be fun. that after that i have no more and i can get back to whatever it was that i did before modules and the musical.
i've just had a music lesson and my teacher's thinking about me starting grade 8 stuff. 8 is the highest grade and it's the thing that if you say you've got it to a completely non musical person chances are they'll probably know what you are on about. thing is it took me 3 years to take grade 6 and i'm missing 7 out so i don't know how well this is going to go. mozart is on the curriculum though and he's good so that might be ok. the last mozart piece i did for grade 6 and the next one is from the same concerto, only it's about 4 pages longer so if i play it i'm going to need a lot of practice.
elsewhere on the music front (sorry if i'm boring you) jazz band is practicing today and i'm going to turn up and use the huge baritone saxophone and see if they let me in. *fingers crossed* they should do because i like the baritone and no-one else does. (it belongs to the music department, i just play it)
a roller skating priest, now i've heard everything. well, not wuite everything. i've still never seen a man eat his own head.
what programme/channel/time are you on? and why pray tell is there an audience for a politics show? i was almost on tv when i was about 10. the choir at my old school were doing a thing on tv for something (details escape me) and i was on the end of the row but tey kept cuting out the cameras before they got to me. it was really annoying, i was watching it later with my family and my granny's going 'where are you dear?' and i had to keep saying stuff like 'well that was my arm there just before the fade out.' *humph*

It's called Let's Talk. I think it's on on Wednesday but I don't know what time because it's probably not live in case anyone asks any embarassing questions. I don't think anyone watches it because Northern Irish politics are too confusing. And it'll be on BBC1 Northern Ireland which means you won't get it in England.
VP stands for Vice Principal, yes.
I haven't done three since I last posted, I just didn't mention the first two after I'd done them. My English is on Tuesday as well, but it's different from yours because we do CCEA (Northern Irish exam board) for English. The stupid thing is that for GCSEs the CCEA results came out two days before the English boards, so we had half our results and still half to get.
I know what Grade 8 is, one of my friends has it in piano or oboe or something musical like that. I wonder what I'm on in piano. I wonder if I could get Grade 1? Probably not.
I still haven't decided whether or not to do Mozart for my German presentation. If not, it'll be on Leisure and Tourism in Germany. Less interesting, but easier.
Have you read the Discworld book where it talks about how if the universe is infinite, everything has to exist? That confused me. Like, if the universe is infinite, somewhere in it there has to be a man eating his own head. I don't know if that's quite right.
I've just noticed that the only two smileys I've been using are and . I've decided I need more variety so I'll just add some in now:

Let's Talk isn't something i've heard of. i'll look out for it bu t i doubt i'll be able to find it because i don't get very much control over out house tv.
i did biology and 2 maths exams on tuesday and physics on thursday. maths 1 was weird but the others were ok.
yeah i've read that bit of discworld. it's good but i don't think a man can eat his own head because the mouth is on the head, just like a hand can't touch the back of itself. just because the universe is infinite doesn't mean that you can eat your own head.
i probably wouldn't be ablt to do grade 1 on piano. just did jazz band but i wanted to do it on a baritone sax and they didn't have appropriate music so i had to do it on tenor which i've never played before, had a bad reid so i couldn't get the right notes, squeaked all the time, hated changing registers and which apparently has a massive range meaning it goes up really high and down really low so i don't know what the notes are and i can't play up the octave because i don't know the notes well enough anyway.
so much for a first jazz band practice. feeling rather sh*te now so i'll finish this posting before i depress you too much.

You sound depressed.
Don't worry, I hadn't heard of Let's Talk before we were told about it in politics. I don't think you'd be able to get it in England anyway.
I didn't understand most of the stuff about the saxophone, but it sounds complicated. We used to have a jazz and blues band before the teacher (same one as did debating) left.
Hope you're feeling better soon.

yeah i'm ok now thanks.
just got a little emotional over nothing but that cleared up pretty quickly. i'll talk to the band teacher and see if i can sort something out.
we have a new guy in our house. he was supposed to be here at the beginning of the year but he had a motocross accident and then visa trouble so he's only just arrived. he's black and has dreadlocks which are so cool! the thing is everyone in school knew about him and when he arrived we sat down in breakfast and literally the whole room was looking at him. he seems cool though, nice guy. should settle in pretty well.
i think i'm getting another cold. i'v got a sniffle and my nostrel is blocked up. i don't want to be ill again! last time was bad enough. 2 other guys have already gone off sick in my house, although one of those was with appendicitus so i don't think that's really in the same league.

Hey, sounds cool!
I also have a cold but nothing very serious.
Sorry I haven't been on for ages, exams are taking over. I have one in a couple of hours which I really, really need to revise for so this post will be very short.
Also because nothing very interesting is happening to me at the minute.
Actually, I can't think of anything.
Work experience next week! And a couple of guys from church are doing it with me which will be fantastic because we're all a bit insane. So it'll be good fun.
Better go revise 'The inter-relationships between the United Kingdown executive, legislature and judiciary.'
Bye!