h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

No! you simply must leave Thursday as it is, because its the day the rubbishman comes. Its how I caculate my week . I never know the date,rarely know the time but I always know when I have to put the rubbish out....Why not set up the elastic time company with me instead .I plan to sell hours for the day when theres not enough of them and a foolproof way to preserve those precious moments!!! I haven't asked many people yet to come on board but you'd be more than welcome.

No, no, no ... you don't understand ... it just has to be changed. Kofi Annan will be striving in vain if we don't rectify this world wide issue first ...

It's worth pointing out that it will still retain the first two letters of T and H so even on the new calendar you'll just have to remember to put the bins out on the day that begins with "Th" ... easy really!

Tell me more about the elastic time company ...

*settles down with and in a large "are you sitting comfortably" type chair*

I think it should be an unobtrusive little corner-shop that is much bigger inside than it is outside. You can borrow time but you can't change it..after all your s**te day might be someone elses best day of their life so its extra time. The hours and minutes that people waste recycled..do you see?

*strokes chin in such a way that suggests contemplation*

Sounds good to me ... although does it mean that if I recycle my kakkier moments I can trade them in for a few moments of pleasure and enjoyment?

Do you know I believe you couldn't. It would change things wouldn't it? No its the stretching and re-cycling of time so you could say 'I wasted four minutes being angry today-I'd like to donate those to be used again in amore productive way...' If you needed more time you could buy extra long minutes or an hour that appeared to you to be more like two. I think there is a space on h2 for a little parade of shops don't you?