h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

but toybox, this is not a question of reprogramming

besides you need a big solid fire axe to do that

or at least to threaten a computer with it. it's all in the

seriously though: it doesn't have to be *that* expensive. you could always ask for an estimate before you let them at it

but don't you - or somebody in your family - know a young computer wizzard , sho?

I'm taking the gruesomes to school today because I took the day off to make a skirt for our company party.

Actually that's not why I'm taking them to school. It's so I can swerve by McD on the way back and have a coffee and use their hotspot... I will use my shiny new netbook by hook or by crook!

Dear Sho,

I do hope that you get your computer fixed up soon. However, I have found that it is no good to blame the computer. It is after all only a mass of keys and internal wiring. Try and do as Pierce the suggests, get someone kind and who really knows, to fix it and then leave it. i find that every time I find someone else who wants to fix my computer, it is really messed up,

have a good day and I hope your new skirt looks nice.

With warm greetings,

Christiane
AlsoRan80

!!/XII/2998 7.10 GMT

<>

Now - there's an idea for a new company if ever I heard one - where are the gorgeous hunky chaps who understand what a woman wants from her computer? (Do you get IT saying "What do you want to do THAT for?")... You know, they come round, and in the comfort of your own home, do exactly what you want and get it all to work?

Someone who doesn't treat you like you're too stupid to configure a modem, but just can't get to grips with this particular piece of new hardware.

Oooh, what have I said. Smelling salts, please.

TC - I'll have one of those!

Christine - nothing is broken. It's just impossible for me to understand how it works. Unfortunately I only have internet friends so I can't ask someone round (I don't mind paying a bit)

All I want to do is plug a bloody wireless router into my modem, install the software and then plug my bloody desktop into that. I can do it but just before the final configuration it flashes up an error message that stays on the screen long enough for me to realise there's an error message. Then it pretends it's done but I can't connect to the internet

Although I do, apparently then have a network between the netbook and the desktop. So maybe I have to connect to the internet in a different way. Too much to ask for even a little diagram to show someone how to do that?

(and the hilarious thing is, if you click "help" it tries to connect you to the Netgear website )

2nd thing - got to McD. Found their network. Connected to that no problem. But how to get on the internet?

no F-ing idea. And the only way you can find out? click "help" and gues what? it's a webpage.

I'm getting really annoyed for 2 reasons. One is that it just should f-ing well work. The second is that I've been using computers for over 20 years. This shouldn't be a problem

NEWSFLASH: While I speak my PC flashed up a message "click here for the installation problem explanation"

click the link and what does it say? No solution could be found.

>> You know, they come round, and in the comfort of your own home, do exactly what you want and get it all to work? <<

And do they take a look at your computer afterwards?

RF

dontpanic> sho. i'm as male as they come (well, at least i have at least four pregnancies to prove it ) but i have given up on computers, cars and whatnots, exceot for the basic every day maintenance and such like

even if i found out how to connect your computer it would be forgotten the next day, since i would only have to do it oncem, so i never bother with stuff like that

surely there must be some people near you who can fix it - and it doesn't have to be a male, why would it?

i could nok recive MMS-messages on my cell phone, even if it said it could. so i took it down to the store and this very sweet young fixed it for me in as jiffy. why would i bother to read a 300+ pages manual to do it myself then?

next thing i'll ask her to make my cell phone recive emails

it may cost a few but i find it is totally worth it

Hmmm - I had a similar problem with my old laptop, and that turned out to be just plain broken.

Can you borrow a usb wireless network thingy for the desktop, and see whether that will connect? I'd lend you mine, but I already lent it out and someone lost it

I do remember I couldn't connect to your network even using your cable - it turned out I was on that wireless one the entire time. It didn't ask me for a password, or anything. Maybe that's the problem with the netbook, too?

I can't get the wireless router to work either because it does that error thing
I just want a f-ing connection. It doesn't seem like too much to ask that a freaking NETbook would connect
I may take it to MediaMarkt tomorrow and as them just what the hell they thing a netbook should do.

Oh and I wondered how you connected because I can see 3 networks (I thought I might just see if it worked anyhow...)
but each one requires a password
I'm guessing that's a new Windows 7 fangdoodle

Possibly someone noticed and slapped a password on it after I was gone. It's not like I *meant* to connect to theirs!

Can you read the error message? If it's too fast, try taking a screenshot

yep. shoot that desktop!

DEar Sho,

Well, my dear friend, I am glad that you let off steam. !!

I must admit that I do not even know what a wireless router is. I do know that something had to be put next to the main telephone connexion which is in my sitting room, and until that was placed there nothing would connect me to the wireless router which is a funny little thing which is sitting winking three lights at me, and it has got four.!! I have never found out what the fourth one is.

I think you will have to do what others have suggested and get an expert in from a firm to set it up for you. I do not even pretend to know what it all means. but I know that I hate it if it is not working.

Go well my dear friend, and enjoy the fact that you even know what a router is even if it does not work at the moment. I have no idea what it is. !!

With affection

Christiane (with and "a")
Also Ran
11/XII/09 15.16 GMT

OK, erm, well, here's a thought. When I first brought my work laptop home and tried to get it onto our wireless router, I could get it to talk to the router but I couldn't get onto the internet. Turned out I had to switch off a LAN setting buried in Tools-internet connections (I have to switch it back on when I get back into the office).

That's probably not your problem. But what you're describing does sound awfully familiar. I *know* that's no help or comfort at all. Have some

When DH wanted to reconfigure our router so that the kids could get internet access through their DS-lites, it involved him going to a webpage to do this. As he said, it was kind of like walking a burning rope bridge - one false move and the whole thing would collapse in a completely unfixable way.

I'm really rather taken with the thought of being able to summon a nice young man to help out with this sort of technical problem. Thing is, I'm imagining somebody tanned, oiled, and topless. And nobody I know that works in IT looks like that.

Mol

Mol

yes, that does sound familiar

in my start menu under preferences there is a button called "network-connections" (at least i guess this is what is called in english, my computer is danish)

if you press that you can activate, deactivate, repair and stuff





ps: you may have gotten this advice already, i haven't had time to go through the backlog

the problem I have is two-fold at the moment
I can't get the wireless router to work at all
which means I can't test the Netbook because there's no wireless internet here (not that I can access, Malabarista didn't have that problem )
so I need to go to a café to try it all out - where I can't see all this advice because I can't get online.

Oh but I should say
thanks to everyone for your help, advice, sympathy and tea. I will get quality time with both computers tomorrow.
If they don't give satisfaction - I have a mallet.

Wasn't Space Ghost continually threatening to "reprogram" his computer by beating it up? Might work for yours, too.

If I were closer, I'd come help, but alas, I don't have the NRW ticket anymore. And I'm not an oiled topless man, anyway.

I'm now getting really peeved. Found an Acer forum. EVERYONE has this problem.

I don't get it. It's a NETbook. It has one job - to connect to the internet. I seem to have a working model because it connects to networks. I am assuming (could be wrong) it's just the factory/default settings. BUT WHY AREN'T THE DEFAULT SETTINGS SET AT GETTING ON THE FREAKIN' NET?

It wouldn't be so bad if all the "you need help, click here" options werent ONLINE