h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I was here, so I am telling you.

In fact, as far as I'm concerned, I 'am' here, but by the time you read this post, the chances are that I won't 'be' here, I will 'have been' here.

Hmm. Those laws of time, eh?

Reminds me of an old Dilbert cartoon where he's setting up his answering machine...

Thanks for coming. Some advise, don't time travel - the verb tenses get all mucked up.

Well, I was thinking about time travelling, but now that you've kindly pointed out to me the tense problems I think I might just give the idea up...

Hmm. "The tense problems" has a dual meaning, doeesn't it? It could mean problems with tenses, or with tension. Or problems which are, in fact, tense. Or any combination of all three. Hmm.

All this word-warping is making me tense.
I got that from Captain Braxton on ST: Voyager.

How would one generate a problem that is tense? Write it on an elastic material then stretch it?

Well, you could get the problem and poke it and goad it and be generally mean to it. That'd get it tense.

Or you could have a problem which would create dire consequences if it wasn't solved. Then it would be pretty tense

But I'm stretching (stretching, geddit? A ha ha ha. Sorry - that was poor) a point here.

What's this all night essay writing spree?

I'm writing essays for uni....I've got three to do for Friday which is the FINAL OF ALL FINAL DEADLINES. If I don't get them in then there's a good chance I'll fail my degree...

So it's kind of important that I get them done .....which is why I'm staying up all night

Ouch... three long essays due in two days. That stinks. I've got two projects in English to do simultaneously, and one of them is one of those get-up-in-front-of-the-class-and-bear-your-soul types. Drat. Good thing my group presentation in History was a while ago. (Otherwise I might have had to actually try to make it _good_, which would have resulted in no change in the grade I'm going to get. This is because my history teacher stinks. Everyone is ecstatic whenever there's a sub, and they all take great pleasure in explaining why they're so overjoyed. Oh well, only a few more weeks.)

I haven't been forced to stay up all night yet, but my younger brother did it one time at a friend's "sleep-over" ust for the heck of it, and played video games all night. For the record, he fell asleep at the baseball stadium the next day when we went to see a Giants game, and slept about half the day. What degree are you shooting for?

All-nighters are a regular occurrence round here I've gone without sleep for 48 hours in the past.............

The good thing about having bad teachers in uni is that at the end of each term we get given forms to fill in evaluating the course. So we can get our own back on horrible English seminar leaders who send you out of seminars for having to blow your nose while they're talking (for example) by writing cutting remarks about them on the evaluation forms.... We (that is, my English seminar group) decided to combine our efforts and give him the worst report imaginable

My degree is a Joint Honours English and History...it's as interesting as it sounds

48 hours! Ouch.

In high school, of course, it's completely up to the teacher whether to ask for feedback or not. (Of course, this guy gets it whether he asks for it or not, if you know what I mean. I like to make witty and sarcastic comments whenever I can. I really want to mail-bomb the guy... if only I knew how. [That's the great thing about institutions like schools - from somebody's name, you can extrapolate their e-mail address!])

I've always wondered what job opportunities there are for history majors other than teaching it...

Job opportunuties? Who said anything about a proper job? I'll do ordinary work for a year and then travel the world for at least 5 years.

I'll worry about a career when I come to it...