h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hmmm.... you don't have any evidence on you by any chance, do you?.........on second thoughts, I don't think the police would take my word for it *looks down at himself*; I'm sure you're really a nice person anyway, what's a few more deaths in the grand scheme of things......

Thought so...

I'm glad we all agree. So, on to the next room?

Sure... After you...

*grumbles* Ladies frst my ass.....

*walks through the door*

My oh my! Hey, Alien, does this little burg of yours already have a Starbucks?

*walks through the door too*

Have a what?

I don't know, I saw it on the Simpsons once....

Oh... I don't think I did...

I think it's a coffee shop of some kind....but there are enough of them around here - let's go to the next room....

ok...

*walks to the next door which is locked*

I knew I should have picked up an axe instead of a mace......maybe if you ask it nicely to open?

Oh, you honorable Door, would you please open??

Well...??
Hmh... ok, how about...

Open sesame!!!

*door refuses to budge*
Maybe you should do a ceremonial dance of some kind....

*rolls eyes*

Why don't you try??

It was worth a shot

Okay, okay, we'll tey this key that was on the lintel...

You had a key?? *sigh* I guess it would've been too easy to use in the first place...

And I had to at least try to get you to dance
*Turns key in slot*
Well, there must be something useful in this room........

*steps into the room after him*

Well if you call *that* useful... Who would keep something like this behind a locked door??

Obviously a very sick and twisted individual. I mean look at her - she must be at least a hundred years old, and here she is locked behind a door, chained to her chair, blindfolded, gagged, and with nothing to eat or drink. Oh well.

You think we should help her??