h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*swings the shovel around*
Aren't you participating too??

Sadly I can't, what with being the judge and all that......

Oh.

Don't worry, I promise I'll be fair.....

Of course you will...

Unless you bribe me......

Ha ha, as if I'd do such a thing!!


Would you take a bribe??

I apologise, I did not mean to dishonour your honesty......


Of course, if you think you need to.....there are a couple of rounds, so you might like to size up the competition first.....


A bribe. Ha!

What could you be bribed with?

What do you have to offer.....I'm open to suggestions.

I don't think I have anything... I had no time to pack when we left... Only my shovel, and you're not going to get it!

Me? Want your shovel? Never happen...... You don't have anything else to offer?

No... I can't think of anything... Dammit...

I might just have to judge fairly then......

Better hurry - the first round is almost about to begin....

*walks in the middle of the room with all the others*

*Walks to his official judging chair, accepting the cheers as he is announced.*
Thank you, thank you!
*The MC calls out to the participants to have their shovels ready. He explains the rules to the crowd.
MC: THe first round is a simple one....it involves moving a pile of dirt from one place to another....the fastest wins 10 points, the most efficient gets 15 points and the most elegant gets 20 points......Shovellers, Are you Rrrrrreeeaaaadddyyy?!!!!!*
On your marks....get set......SHOVEL!

Hmph... How much simpler could it get...
*shovels*

*Critically takes notes.*

*finishes the task*

*MC: Competitors, stand up! There will now be a short break before the next round, as scores are collated.*