h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*waves to Yossarian Prefect
Yes, I saw what you had said a few days back, I shall leave
*waves goodbye and leaves Yossarian Prefect in peace?

*bites into a chili and holds back a scream of pain. instead, he is left shuddering on the floor as tears roll down his cheek. he finally can no longer contain himself,*

OH MY GOD!!! WATER!!! PLEAAASE!!!

It hurts! It hurts sooo bad!!!!!!!!

*throws water at Yossarian*


*and then the bucket as well, to distract him from the pain*


Feel better now?

*finds her feather duster and tickles his feet*

*the bucket hits him in the eye*

Argh!!

*but the second the feather duster touches his foot, he breaks out into manic laughter {luckily Mina doesn't know that I'm the most ticklish person to ever walk the planet*

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha ~gasp for air~ hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha ~gasp~

Nice to see that works.

Has the tickling stopped?

Oh yes. I'm getting the brazier going now.

*the pain in Yoss' mouth fades away...*

Phew.

If I'm not mistaken, isn't brazier a bra?

*the pain in Yoss' mouth fades away...*

Phew.

If I'm not mistaken, isn't brazier a bra?

Oh no.

*gets a poker out and pokes the coals so that they glow white and hot embers fly around the room*

Now, where did I put that branding iron?

*searches through the toy box*

*feeling rather chilly since he's nude and such in a dungeon*

Really? It's not normally cold in here. I try to keep it nice and warm.

*pushes the brazier closer to YP*

Er,
So a brazier is not a bra?

*begins to shiver insanely. Not neccesarily because of the cold, but rather because his nervous system is going berserk. he latches on to Mina's leg*

What are you doing worm??

*knocks YP off her leg*

No, it's like a BBQ, but the meat doesn't go on the fire. The fire comes to the meat.

Now, I've found two branding irons, one with 'Mina's' on it, and one with 'worm'. If you're a good boy and make me happy, I'll let you choose which one you want to be branded with.

Yes, Mistress...

*moves closer to the brazier*

Sorry i sholdn't have left like that <grovel
*kneels outstretches hands palms facing up and crossed at the wrist, lowers head,
can you forgive me?

Hmm, well, calling me Mistress is not a good start! It's High Queen Mina!

Forgive a worm? How funny! I'd never thought of doing that before!

Yes, High Queen Mina...


*his skin begins to burn as he takes another step closer to the brazier*

No need to move too close, you'll burn. Accidental burns aren't fun.

Now tell me how you're going to make me happy, or I'll choose which brand you get.

No need to move too close, you'll burn. Accidental burns aren't fun.

Now tell me how you're going to make me happy, or I'll choose which brand you get.