h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: Internet Viruses: There’s Worse To Come - A22374254
Author: GreyMouser - U3467975

Well, it was about time I added another story. This one is short and not very sweet!

Definitely sinister!
Are the strange characters deliberate?

I really love this...great idea, and it has a point that every person who makes friends in cyberspace should take to heart.

I think I'd like it better without the extra diacritical marks, though.

>diacritical marks?

Ok, so where did THEY come from? When I previewed it before upload they weren't there! Honest, guv!

Right, I've edited them out (they should have been single or double quotes).

:GM:

Strange are the ways of computers...considering the subject matter of the story, should we be worried?

I'm glad somebody asked - I thought it was in imitation of some sort of virus

I like 'a tad mortified'

little story. And has a point.

Thinking on… I found a washing machine advertised on Amazon with an internet capability. I can’t remember the wording, but the impression was, it had an internet link. For what, I don’t know, unless we’ve machines now that you can tell to cool rinse from your desk at work?

Anyway, whether or not this washing machine could, it’s a possibility. So passing viruses into household appliances, houses themselves now you can have electronically controlled security, opening of curtains and windows, heating, then in into cars … is a possibility…

Found that wording - the washing machine was listed as 'internet enabled'.

Perhaps it also has Genuine People Personality...

Do you think that could come in viral form?

Forget Bird-flu - it's the Genuine People Personality Pandemic

Ah, the internet enabled washing machine. It's so that, while you are out, it can call the internet enabled 24-hour plumber after it has chewed up all of your underwear and flooded your house to a depth of 5 feet. The internet enabled 24-hour plumber can then call you to get the release code for your internet enabled front door so that he can investigate the flooding problem...

...in about three months time.

Oh, lord, Philip K. Dick, thou shouldst be living at this hour...

Thank the Lord for my clockwork Luddite model with its Ye-Olde tap connectors, and may it please last me out .

You surprise me! You mean you are NOT looking forward to the day when everything is internet enabled? Think of the fun of finding that your internet enabled kitty litter tray (running embedded Microsoft Windows Whiska) has crashed with a BPOD (Blue Poo of Death) after tiddles exceeded her daily widdle ration and soaked its CPU.

:GM:

And the Blue Screen of Death - Windows needs to shut down - appears on the dashboard as the traffic light at a six lane junction turns red... no.

Mind you, a Neo-pets style cat that just starts fading a bit when you're not there to feed it - that's not so bad. Quieter, you know?
Waz

Very creepy, Greymouser, but a clever little tale

Thanks Chips

I belong to a writing group and this story was written during one of our writing exercise evenings.

We have two types of writing exercise evening. The first is where we write down a short character description, scene and conflict/problem on separate pieces of paper and then exchange them with each other so that we end up with items written by different people. We then have to write a story based on them - I did this for the story at A16333760. The other exercise has a member of the group read a short passage from a book which will (hopefully) inspire us to write something.

This story is from the second type of exercise. I remember someone was reading out something about Julian of Norwich's life. She is supposed to have said "God sent me an illness" (see http://www.mtholyoke.edu/courses/hgarrett/documents/julian.html) and that line stuck in my mind. I just changed "God" to "George" and the rest came from there!

:GM:

Thanks, GreyMouser. Julian of Norwich is a tad too gruesome for me