h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Perhaps we should alter the title of this forum to something along the lines of "Who can slag off Maggie the most"? I don't suppose the likes of her really care now they have all the money/power from their ill-gottten gains.

I was just a twinkle in the milkman's eye when she first came to power, but I remember the day she got replaced (deposed?): my Dad rushed home from work and shouted and sang and we had fish and chips for tea.

I wonder if she gets a state pension?

I remember her moving in to No.10! It still gives me the willies when I see it replayed on t.v. - I can't believe that allegedly inteligent people voted for her (and more than once).

We watched her moving out of No.10 on television in New Zealand (we'd emigrated but have since returned) and when they announced John Major as leader, my hubby and I looked at each other and said "John who?"...

It even occurred to us that it would be worth returning to the U.K. there and then just because Maggie had gone!

There was a photograph with caption in 'Paul Merton's history of the twentieth century' with a photo of John Major in the sixties, reading:

'Here is a man in 1969 doing absolutely nothing. In 1994 he returned and did exactly the same thing.'

Is this a book by Paul Merton (I really like him on "Have I Got News For You")? Is that the title "Paul Merton's History of the Twentieth Century"? We buy "Private Eye" every week also and look forward to their coverage of the Neil Hamilton affair with relish!

Have you got the book? On the cover is a picture of Merton and Armstrong on the moon....

What's Private Eye like? I can't honestly say that I've ever read it. I like what Ian Hislop said about the Al Fayed-Hamilton case: '[This case is unique for me] because I want both sides to lose.'

No, I don't have the book but will add it to my stocking fillers for Christmas! (Better yet, add it to my hubby John's list then I can read it and give him a pressie he'll like!)

By coincidence, I've just given someone else on H2G2 "Private Eye's" web site address (I'm a walking advertisment and should claim a commission): www.private-eye-co.uk. Their publication is brilliant and is only £1 bi-weekly. It makes I larf!

I would claim a payment of about £26 per annum, that would do nicely

You sound like one of those men in '60s American sitcoms who buy their wives sets of golf clubs.

My ex-husband bought me a food processor, a motor lawn mower and a garden shed for my birthdays during our ten year marriage! I left him in the end when he took out a life insurance policy on me and before he bought me my own coffin as a present!

Was he a member of the Mafia? The Triad, maybe...

No, just the British Army! I joke not mind you. We took out a joint life insurance policy and shortly afterward, he replaced the steering rack on our car and forgot to put the washers on so the bolts worked loose and the steering went when I was driving home from work. I never felt quite convinced the incident was accidental as my "ex" was in the Royal Electrical Mechanical Engineers attached to the Army Air Corps as a helicoptor air tech. and should've known better!

It sounsd like a plot from 'A touch of Frost'! It's a textbook case! I'd've (is that a word?) had him arrested for that, if I were you.

Nah! I just did him the big favour of leaving......... while I was still in one piece! I haven't seen him for over 11 years now and still have nightmares that he's trying to kill me! The number of times my hubby, John has woken up by being punched in the face while I'm having a nightmare...... (poor chap!).

It's an interesting thing, that, when a dream's action is transferred to the real world. I used to recite football results in my sleep, or so I'm, told....

This guy haunts you sleep after 11 years? I know what you did eleven Summers ago?

You didn't by chance transfer these footie results to a pools coupon or betting shop, did you? Nah, of course not.

You know what I did? Amazing!

My ex wasn't a pleasant character, which is why I took my 11 month old daughter and left everything (except the cats & dogs). Hence the nightmares, I suppose.

John, hubby no.2 (bless 'im) sleeps next to the radiator in our bedroom (on the bed of course - well what I mean is, his side of the bed is next to the radiator so he has to climb over me to get in - say no more!). Anyway, he frequently dreams that he's 007 or something equally exciting and fighting bad guys with his amazing martial arts he's endowed with in his dreams and has seriously injured his big toe on a couple of occasions so that I've had to get up and bandage it to stop the bleeding!

I would have done that, only a) They were the wrong results, and b) I was about seven at the time. Aside from those two little problemettes, I think I could have had a wonderful time defrauding the betting shop fraternity

The bookies lost out here in the UK when it snowed on Christmas day... I love it when they have to pay out!

Well, somewhat like slot machines, there's plenty of sound and fury when they have to pay out a little, but those occasions are pretty rare, and most of the time they keep very quiet.

Those little rakey things in bowling alleys bother me. I never win...