h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Simulposts again.. Ok...

For 'Duck, what duck?'
Q: What were the last words George said before getting struck in the temple by a subsonic eider fired from a nearby pneumatic canon?

For "No, but if you whistle the first few bars I'll soon pick it up."
Q: Is that the chorus of 'Macarena' written out on that large war club there?

A: Moisten liberally three times daily.

Q - How do you make a flower border work in the Sahara?

A - Because it semed like a good idea at the time.

Q: How do you water orchids?

A: Two 4-year-olds playing war on the neighbours' lawn.

Knew I shouldn't have!

Q - what eventually did for the local population of moles?



A - Disregard everything he ever said.

Q: What was the best advice the Zen philosophy master gave to his graduating accolytes?

A: A knob of butter.

Q - What did the culinary sculpturer give his statue?



A - Only if there's an 'R' in the month.

Q: Does Elmer Fudd ever have difficulty reading aloud from scheduling a date?


A: Perfect Cubic Cleavage.

... I changed trains mid stream there...

Make that:
Q: Does Elmer Fudd ever have difficulty reading aloud from a calender or scheduling a date?

Q - What did the mathematician admire above all else?



A - It looked better with the lower ribs removed.

Q. What were Picasso's nudes famouse for?

A. He dripped, poured and spattered to get the result he wanted.

Q - Why would Rolf's wife not allow him into the kitchen?


A - £3.00 each - or two for £5.00

This is such a popular thread that it's almost impossible not to simulpost. Change my question to: Why did God make Eve the way He did?

Oh bum! I quit!

Ok... from now on when there are simulquestions the next player can make a judgement call as to which question is 'better' and question the coresponding answer or can combine the multiple answers to continue.

A - £3.00 each or two for £5.00

Q: What would Van Gogh's paintings be worth if he hadn't cut off his own ear and moved to the South Pacific?


A: Radio, Television and Film.

...is it safe?

Q: What are the three things Ernest Dull, from the novel "Life of a Dull Man", simply cannot stand?

A: Try again.

Q. In what industry did Ronald's mum make her name before opening the toenail clipping salon in Truro?

A. Fabio

AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!