h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Odd thing happened today. The forums at douglasadams.com ceased to exist.

Okay, glib. I shall elaborate. They failed to list threads, or acknowledge that there are any, and then they refused to let me post (which I rather expected they would, in fact that's why I tried) citing "misconfiguration" or something.

I don't know whether the problem exists inside the server or my computer. My computer has been known to do odd little things like that just to keep me on my toes, you see. So I hesitate to bother "[email protected]" as it would be a complete waste of his or her time if it turned out to be a problem with my computer.

So I'll try it again later. If the problem persists then perhaps I shall alert the authorities. Until then, I thought I should tell somebody... even if it is just my navigational goo.

I've been having the same problem too. So it's not just you

Yeah. Me too.

Aaaagh! Someone's spying on my journal!

No, that's all right really. People are supposed to I think. It's just that I never actually expected such a thing to be, so it comes as a bit of a shock. I think it's passed now.

Erm, so, good, Ant, I'm glad it's not just me. Also, good, Shim, I'm glad it's not just me. And finally, good, TDV, I'm glad you fixed it and I hope it wasn't too terribly difficult and that you didn't have to stay up very late working on it.

Oh, and one last thing. It may sound at first like rather an unpleasant thing to say (I know because the little voice in my head tried saying it different ways as so often it does, and when it said it in its nastiest tone, even I was offended) but it's meant, really, as a completely useless comment meant to affect no one in any particularly insulting and/or scintillating way. Your yellow (gold?) fishy thingy, Shim, I only today really looked at it and discovered it's not a lemon. That's not to say that it especially looks like a lemon, because upon this inspection I found that it definitely does not, but I tend to associate images with fruit. You see? I told you it was useless information. But there was a moral... oh, what was it... AH! Yes. That it's a very nice fishy, Shim, and it doesn't look one little bit like a lemon.

(You can't this bit because I'm in parentheses. So what I was going to say was that it's nice here. I'm allowed to ramble, because in an indirect way it's sort of still my journal. It's like when you dream about people, and you can do things to them that you can't really do, like kick them in the knee or buy them a condo in Boca. I love this place.)

Typical, making retractions and corrections in my own quasijournal/journal discussion area.

First of all, I've got to point out that that bit just then when I said "nice fishy" was completely unwarranted, and I swear I didn't mean the Y. Nice fish. That's what it should have said. I would have left it alone but I found it just a bit sickening. "Nice fishy." Ecch.

And secondly, a bit of accidental research reveals that I'm not the first to associate the fish with a lemon, and had I known that I'd never have mentioned it. Really though, it doesn't look like a lemon. Really. When you look directly at the thing you can see the tail very clearly, revealing that it is quite obviously a fish and not a lemon with lips.

All right, it does look a bit like a lemon, but only a bit.

It's a good thing H2G2 is here or I'd probably be typing away and spouting inanity at some poor sod in IM right now. Yet another reason to quit my as-yet-awaiting-activation job and spend the rest of my life at my PC. That and the thing about spending all afternoon with lots and lots of children. I find that's a good reason as well.

This is my last word on the fish, I promise. Really. I know I'm not to be trusted but it is, it's my last word, won't say another thing about it or strike me dead.

Take a deep breath and be calm.

It has been stated before that the fish looks like a lemon. And indeed it does. It also doesn't bother me 'cos I didn't draw it.

I have, in fact, drawn myself a new fishy that will be exclusively mine as I'm fed up with everybody pinching it. The fish is mine, Damnit! When the new code goes live, all my fishes will be blue and everyone else will be stuck with the lemon.

If the DNA forums disappear again (which they really shouldn't again), please e-mail me ASAP and I will kick the box around until it starts working. The worst thing is that it always happens on a Saturday when I'm not looking.

P.S. and I did stay up late fixing it and missed going to see the Matrix with my mates because of it.

Funny, it looks more like an orange to me...

Saw The Matrix on Saturday, and it completely rules. I'd go so far as to say it's an oligarchic dictator of a film, so hard does it rule.

Calm. Good idea. I don't do enough of that I think. And a blue fish... bluefish... a fish that is blue... will be a better fish, because blue lemons are decidedly rare.

I'm keeping an eye on the DNA forums. Not so much to be helpful as really just out of sheer suspicion and mistrust and lack of better things to do with my afternoons. So, er, you can count on me, sort of. Not that I think you or anyone else should do such a silly thing, or that anyone would ever want to, but, you know, whatever makes you the happiest, everybody.

And oranges, I feel obligated to point out, are round. Well, before they fall off the truck and get run over of course. After that they're not oranges anymore. They just smell like oranges.

You'd think that someone would have suggested putting some sort of lid on the fruit trucks so the fruit doesn't fall out all over the road. They've got to be losing money, no?

KM, looks like you saw your first forum crash. It's happened a couple of times before. You get used to it. Shim comes along and fixes everything when he's good and ready. It used to be worse--we didn't have toys like this to fall back on. Being completely forum-less is a depressing state sometimes. Although when I am, I tend to go outside, which is fun.

Oh, and Shim did this fantastic impression of Keanu Reeves last week. Okay, maybe you had to see it, but trust me, it was funny.

Also, Shim, you do realize that if HTML ever becomes enabled in the forums, people can still steal it, right? You must remember to stick in a bit of code so they can't.

Don't worry about a thing. I'm spending the next 7 weeks writing an automatic fish graphic filter. I'm sure Jim won't mind.

Oh jeez. I've got horrendous hay-fever.

I feel ghastly.

Well, you seemed so concerned everyone else had taken your original fish, I thought it bore mentioning. Then again, I'm just bored today, so I'm worrying about everything for everyone.

As for the hay fever, I've got no suggestions, but I suppose I could worry for you if you'd like.

The chances of me going to work tomorrow are evaporating rapidly.

And Sean didn't come in today cos he was ill.

You could worry about that if you like.

Oh great so that means Spartus and I are going to get the mystery TDV illness, fantastic.

Right. Off to worry, then.

Hiya, Ant. You know, I am sort of coming down with something. I thought I'd caught something on the plane, but if it's from you guys, oooh...
*shakes fist*

Oi. Stop it.

Ok will ask the pharmacy.

Oh, terrific. Now I'm worried too. If Sean and Shim stop taking care of things, and Ant and Spartus stop playing with things, where does that leave me, eh? In my bedroom with a yellow elephant and an answering machine, dutifully ignoring a basket of clean socks, that's where. Next you're going to tell me they've cancelled television for the rest of the summer.

Okay, that's torn it. I've got to get a job.