h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

"Bad mood?"
"Bad mood. I feel like a thumbtack. An angry thumbtack."

Not really—that expression just makes me laugh a lot, so I thought it was about damn time I shared it with... er, with my Journal.

Ahh but your journal is read by, er me, so it's not just your journal you shared it with

Then I hereby expand the phrase "my Journal" to include my Journal's audience.

*feels all included*

We, um...

Ummmm....

We don't have to pay admission, do we?

That's Spartus for ya. All he does is worry about money.

worry worry worry money money money.

'strue.

Admission, yes.

Money, no.

*waits by door, holding empty toe-basket* Right—line up...

*detatches toe*

*drops toe in basket*

*keeps line moving*

*pulls out a sharp knife and goes looking for sleeping people*

I'll be back with enough empty toes to get a season pass, I will.

*stands in the corner and bleeds*

I don't know about you, but I believe he will. Yes he will.

*doesn't ask doesn't ask doesn't ask doesn't ask does*

Empty toes?

*adjusts basket so that it does not drip on her shoes*

*runs in, dripping on the floor*

Ooh. One sec.

*runs back out, wipes off the knife, runs back in*

Allow me to cite the origin of empty-toeness and all that:

>*waits by door, holding empty toe-basket*

Yes, I'm aware that it's referring to a basket for toes that is now empty, but the phrase "Empty toes" is kinda funny.

*races off to get more empty toes for the empty toe basket*

*falls over toeless and laughing*

I wonder if it would be a good idea to design and give out (free with admission) some shoes to help people keep their balance without shoes.

Shoes that help people ballance without shoes?!? My dream has come true!!

*bows and scrapes to KM*

Damn it... no, that's what I MEANT to say.

*is stubborn*

I know! Shoeless shoes! The wave of the future!

The pervert in me is just hoping that you'll invent pantsless pants.

Moderation—got to build up to pantsless pants, because at this early stage in my inventorship, I can only imagine pantsless pants as being shorts.

So I'm working on the sockless sock, and then I'll try the kneepadless kneepad, and just sort of work my way up from there.