h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Cooking for yourself helps, too, because you can control not only portion sizes but how much oil/sugar/etc you put in.

My problem isn't that I don't eat healthy foods. It's that I eat really fast, so I tend to eat more than would have been necessary. None of the "tricks" to get people to slow down work. Sure, I usually eat stuff that tastes good (in fact, I have no problem eating stuff I don't like more slowly- that can take hours! ), but I don't really see eating as a hobby or some orgiastic experience. It's purely functional for me- I eat because I am hungry. I think the eating fast is a holdover from all the years spent working retail where I always got stuck working through my meal breaks and had to scarf my food... whatever it is, I tend to eat my food too fast and eat too much regardless of how small the portion is.

Ah well...there's your problem. To the French, eating *is* an orgiastic experience. They eat tons of butter, cream, oil, goose fat yet remain annoyingly stick-thin.

I just don't see a point. I grew up with a mother who thought that way- that there was some void in her life not fulfilled otherwise that should be sated with food. She's over 400 lbs now!

I'm trying harder to slow down eating and eat much smaller portions- this morning I managed a simple tofu-cream blintz with a handful of fresh berries, and I'm quite full.

You know, I'm really not that big a fan of real butter and cream and all that. Really rich foods upset my stomach.

Ah...but there's foopd and there's food. Comfort calories and ecstasy.

When François Mitterand was dying with cancer, he convened a last supper. One of the dishes was 'ortolan' - a rare (and illegal) songbird, served whole. Traditionally, the eater places a lace veil over his head while eating it, so nobody can see his shameful pleasure. No matter what one thinks of carniverousness, one has to say, "Way to go!"

In a similar vein, I have just spent a disgraceful £15 on cheese from IJ Mellis, Cheesemonger. Nothing fancy, either. Isle of Mull Cheddar, Cheshire and Caerphilly. But all of the highest perfection.

Read 'em and weep: http://www.ijmellischeesemonger.com/products.htm

Ah, comfort food. A big no-no for me.

The cheese place sure has a wide variety. I love cheese- though I'm limited somewhat because a lot of local places don't stock cheese made from non-animal rennet. Probably for the best- I tend to eat too much of it when I have a lot around, and I prefer softer cheeses, which are so much more fattening. Except brie... I haven't quite acquired a taste for that yet.

So how stinky are these cheeses you've just gotten?

Cheese alert:

In theory, they're on the less stinky end of the spectrum. Cheddar is the default British cheese - 'cheddaring' was originally the process of ageing a hard cheese in the caves of Cheddar Gorge. Cheshire and Caerphilly are also reasonably common supermarket varieties (Caerphilly less so), albeit sold in a bastardised, mass-produced varieties.

Anyay, the ones I got are the real artisanal deal. As such, they're covered in a smelly rind. IJ Mellis store them in a cellar, not in fridges. They cut chunks to order from the whole cheeses.

Wensleydale - again an a regional variety - made in Hawes, about three miles from my ancestral home. It's promoted as a specialist variety - but to be honest it's pretty industrial. Not the kind of thing IJ Mellis would want to be associated with.

Then there's that well-known Palestinian cheese shop, Cheeses of Nazareth.

I have a magnet on my fridge which bears the likeness of a cow with a halo and the caption "what a friend we have in cheeses".

Though I suspect I picked it out more for the Jesus-schtick (a fondness of mine, and a recurring them in my knick-knack collection) than the cheesy aspect of things.

My favorite cheddar these days is the Bond-Ost stuff we get at the Swedish deli; the one with the caraway seeds in it. I've never been especially fond of really ripe or really sharp cheeses. As a matter of fact, until my late twenties, I didn't like cheese *at all*. Not even on pizza. So I'm always keen on recommendations. I'm always game to try something new. But... if it smells like a locker room, I have a hard time getting it into my mouth without gagging. I'm "funny" about strong smells.

>>So I'm always keen on recommendations

Oddly enough...'Keen's' is a well-regarded variety of artisanal Cheddar. The hand-made things really are very different to the mass-produced ones. You have to eat them in Parmesan-thin shavings. If you leave the rind on, they taste powerfully of mold and mildew.

This conversation is constantly reminding me of the Cheese Shop Sketch by Monty Python

Mmmm, mold and mildew!

Just kidding, of course.

Thanks to Susanne, I've thought of something to do with myself this evening once all the chores are done. It's been a long time since I was "home alone" on a Saturday night (and it's too hot out to go anywhere). Monty Python, cheese sketch-

Now there are ideal names for pet sloths:

"Let me introduce you; she is Mildew & he is Mold; yes, yes, they are supposed to be green, they move so slowly moss grows faster on a dead Rolling Stone. More tea vicar? Cheesus sandwich? He wasn't really crucified y'know, he had Stilton"

(There is actually a small & incredibly boring town in Wales called Mold; i Know this to be true; i have visited it unfortunately)

zdt

On the other hand - it does have the excellent Teatr Clwyd. (Is that now 'The National Theatre of Wales'?) Yeah - we holidayed near there many a time as children. There's a place nearby called Loggerheads.

Yes, you're right there Ed, in fact two of my oldest friends work there (Stage manager & Light/Sound tech)

zdt