h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hello and welcome to our first PSA meeting!
My parents are out so I'm sneaking online. This is a conversation thread for all researchers who go to BPS, so we can keep track of each other. That means YOU, Hippo Sam and Chris, and Etharei too if she ever gets herself out of fanfiction.net for 2 minutes. So yeah. Hi.

Please post!

Right - and about that Etharei thing - whatever she says to you about it (if she ever does) - i back you up completely - haha!!!
lala - three weeks left of exams - blurgh - OMG - that paper three was hell in an exam paper - blurgh
and if anyone opposes that - i'll make them eat their ass for breakfast.....mua ha ha
bla bla bla
ciao - OMG etharei is here!!!!!!!!!!
-hippo/iz

Yay. I am hungry. Beware the blue elephants.

Yes.

~

Bring 'em on, sweetie! Just found this on FF.Net, thought I'd share:

Summary: Chaos in Aman. Drowning Hobbits. Hormonal heroes and Ringbearers. Valier frightened out of their wits. Returned kinslayers. Grumpy Mandos. And all because … the Valar have decided that it would be a very good idea to have children of their Thought… Oh dear *eg*

Anyways, is Hippo a hippy? I've got some coconut-bananas I can share!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO - do not beware of the blue elephant - beware of the RUBBER DUCKYYYYYYYY - it will eat you up, roll you around it's rubber ducky tummy, then regergitate (if you say anything about that spelling i will slap you)(schro...)you into the fiery doom of satan's panties.........MUAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!
grrrrrrrrrr rrrrrrrrr rrrrrrrr rrrrrrr rrrrrr rrrrr rrrr rrr rr r ...
let's make up a story!!!!!!!!
i'll start -

- One dark and misty morning, a ray of light shone bleakly onto the surface of the largest pond anyone had known. many legends had been passed on through many generations but the same fear of the pond/lake remained.......the legend was told like this...

*assumes the voice of an old male storyteller from somewhere rural*

There was once, in that there lake, oh arr my children, a young tadpole by the name of Blob. Now Blob, O children, was a happy young tadpole. Oh arr, that he was. But one day, he met a witch, so he did. And she was an evil witch, so she was. And she did be swimming when she met poor Blob, who saw her and tried to be friendly. The witch...

... said "Oh, yegods! A Blob!" And the Blob reared its squiggly head, gave a tadpole-roar, and said, "Indeed, woman, what do you take me for?" "A Blob," answered the witch. "Yes, I figured," the tadpole muttered. He swished...

...his mighty tail...and by a miracle , made the wicked witch drop her magical staff...and away Blob fled, never to be seen again. The witch was FURIOUSSSSSSSS, she vowed to find Blob and make him suffer/kill him said in a nice way as to not scare the kiddies listening to the tale...so she bent down, picked up her staff...only to find...

...that it had been replaced by a squirming bunch of tadpoles! Yes indeed, O children. The tadpole army was being raised, for the witch, in the act of threatening poor innocent Blob, had incurred the wrath of the tadpole nation. They squirmed around her wrist, up her arm and soon her head was haloed in a mass of writhing black squiggles. So she made up her mind to use...

(off the subject: Mr. Moore should be impaled, burned and then fed to the monitor lizard. I hope he's not monitoring this computer...)

...the scariest power she posessed. And so she lifted the hem of her dress, up and up and up. The tadpoles knew a feast when they saw one, and popped in. Unbeknowst to them, this was a trap. You see, chastity belts have their advantages...The witch cackled evil-ly, like most witches do, but chocked (unlike msot witches), and fell , as if in slow motion, into...

whoops - typeops.....*choked and *most

d4 i<ky, i<ky p00l, ewwwwwww!! Unf0ur<hun4tl3y 4 d4 w17<|-|, d4 3vil 74dp0l3s w33r 571ll 4live 4nd trying to 347 h3r fac3. Waaaaaa!!! PH34r d4 74dp0l3s! l3f7 w17h n0 opshion sh3 d3c1d3d 2...

(lol)

...kill all people who use L337, because she found it difficult to read and thought this was unfair! So she began to use the curse of Teel, and one by one all the L337-5pe4K3r5 in the world spontaneously combusted, poor things.
And while she was thusly distracted, the tadpoles had all swum off to the Great Slimy Frog who lived at the very bottom of the lake, to ask him if they could use a tadpole spell so terrible that, once it was spoken, would make...

...anyone who dared enter the lake , to be considered as the witch's next of kin...da da da duh - basically meaning - that anyone who goes in the lake will be eaten up by the caniballist (?) tadpoles...."
"Yes-sirry, my children. The tale is as true as the hairs on my...

... hairy
And anyway, the story continues as we zoom out to a castle on a hill, where a man called Ghar'ka is currently...

...eating a live wild sheep by the name of Heurnoip."Oh no don't eat me - i'm a lucky sheep - i swear!" - is crying the sheep.
"So you say Heurnoip, not so lucky once i eat of your...

... pink grobboly krarcks. And I'm sure you know what THOSE are, so just shut up and let me eat you."
"But wait! Baaaa!" said the sheep, "I can- baaaaa- do you a deal. Please listen to me!"
"Well, out with it.."
"Ok. Baaaa. Have you ever heared of...

...the great bearded goat that lives on the hill of Watzico? If you spare me he will grant you the greatest gift any man could EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER possess! i swear that this is no joke!But be warned, if you this power unwisely, it could destroy you and your family, like ba-a-a-a-a That."*snaps his fingers*(or what was left of them)
"Hum, this is hard choice, ar it is.A delicious dinner, or a deal with half a sheep and a goat to gain a "power" that could destoy the little i have left of a family...arrr, that's a tough one.....ar well, ma matey-o...i'd rather have sheep for dinner,,,,har har har".
And so the sheep was No more, deceased , eaten, being passed down bit by bit into the long entrails of the old man...little did Ghar'ka know that Heurnoip WAS indeed a lucky sheep, infact, the sheep was working miracles and disasters right inside the old man...
(sorry this is so long - i am bore-d. (have you realised that we are the only two really telling this story? hum.))

Breack from story
"kill all people who use L337" - hay! wh47 did w3 d0 2 u? y u w4n7 2 ki11 411 1337-5p34ker5? b35id35 if u ki11 a11 1337-5p34ker5 7h47 m34n5 L4rg0 45 we11
returne to story
(in English fro those of you that are not of 1337ish nature)
The sheep in its last dieing moments cast great spells of power, invocking magiks long forgoten even by the gratest of wizards. Unforuchunitley for the old man these all include a lot of chanting, incence and strange danceing. But this was soon to be the lest of his troubels as when the great incantashion was finished a powerful wormhole was opened a wome hole that lead to...

... what appeared to be, at a first glance, Hell. Ghar'ka was sucked through and landed on the ground, only to find that it wasn't really Hell. Oh, no. Horror of horrors, it was MS HEDGES' BEDROOM!!!!!!!!!!!!

A ghastly apparition approached the trembling man. He realised that it was Ms Hedges herself and tried to scream himself into oblivion. But before he could...