h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

tiddelipom tiddelipom

Very dusty!

*coughs*

hmm hmmm no one here, no one there, no one anywhere

Nice lair, but it really needs to get cleaned up...

*sits down in a dragon sized comfy chair*

Well, not in perfect shape, plumbing needs to be fixed, roof to be mended, fire place looks as it hasn´t been used for ages...

*looks around*

and the curtains...

must have been solely males here.... bad behaving uncivilized ones probably

* flies out through an open window*

I'll ask that you get out of my kingdom. It was prosperous, clean, and powerful. But then all of my Dragon Lords died. I've been hibernating recently because the evil army wasn't doing anything.

Now, you are welcome to join, and if you promise you're active i might even make you a dragon lord. You can be the first of my new council alongside Anole. He's due for a promotion.

Oh... and i wasn't in his bathroom! He lies! I was in my lair! With gold and jewels and ivory and compensating!

Well...

since dragons are matrilineal, and I am a queen, this means I am the Supreme Matriarch...

and since I have had hatchlings enough, I have no need for a dragon lord

unless...

you are handy with plumbing, roof mending, vacuum cleaning and are an excellent

This place really needs to get in order!

You can't throw me out! I created this dragon empire and watched as it crumbled! In THIS land dragons are patriachal so join up or ship out! With the state things are in i have no need for a civil war but i can assure you that if one occurs I have many many allies to call upon.

This is pathetical!

A grumpy shadow of a once-maybe-perhaps-dragon-lord mutters like an old and weak human loser!

Shape up, after all you are a , a noble being, above such futilities.

The only ones that will benefit from a civil war, are dragon impersonators as lizards and chameleons!

So, lets behave as the mature dragons we are (at least me) and sort this out.

Are you listening? I just told you I didn't want civil war. I also told you (somewhere else probably) that you are welcome to visit, join, hang out, renovate, ect.

Well, we can discuss this later...

It´s almost 4 am and I MUST have some sleep. Even have to obey rules of IRL sometimes.

Nice chatting to you.

... Sleep? (the joke doesn't make sense because Draco just joked about being in hibernation the whole time) They can't all be jems...

* returns and finds the lair as abandoned as ever*

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*sits down in a VERY dusty dragon sized comfy chair with *

cough! cough!

*opens windows and lets the cold morning winds blow away dust and old dirt*

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* leads small stream throgh lair to wash away dirt that wasn´t blown away*

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*warm winds dry lair*

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That´s much better! A clean lair! Let´s see what needs to be repaired...

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* walks down to the basement to check plumbing*

Holy Flares and Fire! More rust than even a quadrizillion of iron eating bacteria could handle

*knocks - very carefully - with a claw on waterpipe with multitude of rusty flakes. Waterpipe falls apart*

*walks up to lair again. Leaves note on table to Draco*

"please, start fix plumbing, will be back with new waterpipes. "

*Flies away*

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* returns with load of fresh harvested water pipes, tools and other plumbing equipment*

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*notices that no Draco´s around. Walks down to basement with plumbing stuff*

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*sighs*

Well, better get started.

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* comes up from basement, very dusty and rusty.*

I need a bath!

*flies away*


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* returns and takes a look at the roof*

Hmm, holes, leaks... Better get bricks and timber.

*strolls around lair humming*

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and more tools

*leaves*

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Takes its tolls to be Godmother... Well, I´d better start with the roof.

* flies up to the roof and starts to repair it.*

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need more nails

*flies away*

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* repairs the roof. Sun shines and spring is in the air*

Wonder where all the dragons have gone?

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* sits down in the dragonsized comfy chair with *

Ahhh, good.....

*looks around*

Those curtains!

*flies away to get beautiful fireproof curtains to lair*

Hey the place was prettified

Where is QueenDragon? I thought my halucination would lead her here or did I halucinate having a Protoss High Templar halucinate me to make two copies? I am just confusing myself.

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* returns with fireproof curtains and carpets*

Hello Anole! Nice to see you.

The fireplace must be fixed. I´ll just put away the curtains and carpets. Then I´ll fly up to the chimney and sweep it.

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