h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/A652880

A bit late in the year for this, but it's gap, as far as I can tell. I can't for the life of me remember what made me write this, but here we go. I'd appreciate input on:
1. The latin - is there a name for conkers *specifically* as opposed to the name for the tree, or a better construction for the quote.
2. Making it look better - I don't much like what does.
3. Any details on rules or links, there are bound to be lots of bearded forty-year olds still playing this to the 1947 Cheapside rules Edition 3b.

Any other comments gratefully received....

H.

Excellent entry. This take me back to my youth when my mother would shout at us to pick up the inevitable conker carnage.

You have mentioned that the more obscure rules are not within the scope of the article, but two of the unique rules (or so I am told) from our school were:

stampies - I you drop your conker at any time (during battle or just through clumsiness) then it can be stamped upon be anyone.

Strings - if your strings become entangled then you can attempt to yank your oponents conker of the string and then stamp it as above.

Is conkers a British pastime or do other countries play it?

What is the highest value conker you have ever heard of. There was talk of the mythical fourty eighter at our school.

A colleague was telling me that he bought a plastic game called battling conkers for his son (with rebuilable conkers). a reference to this poor substitute may be relavant.

Excellent article. Humorous and on-the-money.

Two small corrections:
In the section "What is/are Conkers" there are a couple of typos.

"Pastimes" should read 'pastimes'

"one or other of the conkers so damaged" should read "one or other of the conkers IS so damaged..."

I think this article deserves editorial approval!

Jwordsmith

PS I'm a girl, and I used to play conkers. Mostly with boys, though, now that you mention it...

er, I meant:

"passtimes" should read "pastimes"

Thanks, jd, and welcome to H2G2!

I've fixed the typos.

I'm curious. What made this the *only* thing you commented on in your first session here???

Looking forward to reading submissions from actual proper writer...

H.

What made this the only thing I commented on? It was the only thing I knew anything about, and felt qualified to comment on...

Thanks for the welcome. I've been lurking on and off for a long time but finally decided to jump in!

Julie

I seem to remember strings and stampies as well. This was in the north of England, but I think it was probably fairly universal.

I like the entry and the gentle reference to the radio play/book/film (the bit about the environmentalists).

Nice entry! Definitely worthy.
I am quit sure conkers are not that wide spread, as I am sure I would have at least heard of it being played. I have always wondered what conkers was though, thanks for the enlightenment!
Cheers, and good luck!
PS Nice footnotes.

Hi, Hoovooloo!

A few comments:
First, Nora's horse chestnut entry that you link to is unedited, so you'll have to drop that link. (I think it's still a work in progress, and that she intends to expand it).

I had a look in Richard Mabey's book 'Flora Britannica', which is a very good source on cultural information about plants in Britain, as opposed to botanical information. He says that the first record of actual conkers being used is from the Isle of Wight in 1848. Apparently, in the 17th century there were cobnut fights played with hazel-nuts on strings, and in the 18th century 'conquerors', called 'conkers' in some areas, was played with snail shells (or even live snails). The snail shells were pressed against each other until one broke.

It is suggested that the reason it took about 250 years from the intoduction of the horse-chestnut to recorded games of conkers is that the early plantings were all on private estates, and it was only when the chestnut was planted on village greens and in public parks in Victorian times that children had easy access to them.

There is a World Conker Championship which has been held at Ashton in Northamptonshire since 1965. There is a web page as part of the sponsors' site, which includes a lot of Mabey's information, and general information about rules. Googling on the phrase 'bonkers for conkers' should find this site at the top of the list.

You only mention the numbering going up one at a time, but the most widespread rule seems to be that the victor absorbs the loser's score, so that a sixer smashing a sixer would become a twelver. There appear to be various conker records in the Guinness Book of Records, so you might find more information there about the highest numbers ever reached. I saw a reference to a 7,351-er but I don't know if that's a world record or not.

Azara

What a great entry on one of my favourite topics!
Is it really an exclusively male activity? I adore playing with conkers, stamping on them, collecting them (when I'm in England that is) even though I'm a girl (tomboy) and I know other girls that do. I tried to bring some back to Australia, but I wasn't allowed. You might like to mention that nail varnish apparently also makes conkers harder.

This is a great article. The only thing it is missing is an explanation of the origins of the word conker. I believe it came from a rhyme which players of the game used to recite:

obli obli onker
my nut will conquer

Cheater!!

Putting nail varnish on conkers who has ever heard of such terrible thing!

Ah so many good comments...

Azara...

>First, Nora's horse chestnut entry that you link to is unedited, so you'll have to drop that link.

I know. Shame that. I just thought it worth putting in in the hope that it might get recommended too. Unless she doesn't want it, as you say...

>Apparently, in the 17th century there were cobnut fights played with hazel-nuts on strings, and in the 18th century 'conquerors', called 'conkers' in some areas, was played with snail shells (or even live snails). The snail shells were pressed against each other until one broke.

"Conker" is, according to my etymological dictionary, derived from a dialect word for snail shell from the 19th century (?). Not sure whether that means the word "conker" is 19thC or whether the dialect origin word is 19thC, but I suspect the former.

>It is suggested that the reason it took about 250 years from the intoduction of the horse-chestnut to recorded games of conkers is that the early plantings were all on private estates

There you go, bringing class into it again.
Well that's what it's all about, innit?

>There is a World Conker Championship which has been held at Ashton in Northamptonshire since 1965.

Forty year old bearded men ahoy? (note - sexism is usually completely acceptable if it's MEN you're insulting)

>You only mention the numbering going up one at a time, but the most widespread rule seems to be that the victor absorbs the loser's score, so that a sixer smashing a sixer would become a twelver.

Not the way it worked at my school, but I'll bow to the majority...

>There appear to be various conker records in the Guinness Book of Records, so you might find more information there about the highest numbers ever reached. I saw a reference to a 7,351-er but I don't know if that's a world record or not.

As I said in the terribly delayed entry on unicycles, setting records is not that impressive, unless you're doing something *really* daft - playing conkers while freefall parachuting would get a mention, anything less than that and I'm not really interested. Call me a cynic, just don't call me in the middle of the night, put on a deep voice and ask me if I like scary movies...

Niwt...

>Is it really an exclusively male activity?

Not exclusively, obviously. Just mainly, in my experience (see jwordsmith comment above).

>You might like to mention that nail varnish apparently also makes conkers harder

You may think that, I could not possibly comment.

Gnomon...

>This is a great article. [flatterer!] The only thing it is missing is an explanation of the origins of the word conker.

See above. It used to mean snailshell, apparently.

That's enough for now, any more for any more?

H.

Yes, when I played it, the winner absorbed the number of victories of the loser as well.

I seem to remember 'oblie, oblie, onker' as well.

Yes, girls play it as well. I did!

So did I .

entry.

As an alternative to pullquotes, have you tried the PRE tag. It keeps the format as you type it, including line breaks and spaces, even spaces at the start of the text. (Http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/A340985)

Time, I think, for a straw poll.

Is playing conkers an almost exclusively male activity, as described in the entry, OR is it only mainly a male activity, OR am I just being completely blinkered and has the youth of today outgrown the narrowminded sexism of the seventies and is conkers now an equal-opportunities sport?

H.

wouldn't know - I played conkers in the 60's, late '60s, (ish).

Hoovooloo,

I think the origin of the word conker is uncertain and that there are two rival theories: one that it is from "conch", a shell, and the other that it is from "conquer". You might like to mention both.

I have heard the theory about the rythme and 'conquer' many a time, but never the one about the conch shells which are very large and spiraly...

Editorial Note: This conversation has been moved from 'Peer Review' to 'Conkers'.

This thread has been moved out of the Peer Review Forum because your entry has now been recommended for the Edited Guide.

You can find out what will happen to your entry here: http://www.h2g2.com/SubEditors-Process

Congratulations!