h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

There are no end of examples of bizarre ideas for which their inventors have secured patents, but my favourite (if that is the right word) is:

U.S. Patent 3,216,423 (1965) to George B. Blonsky and Charolette E. Blonsky for:

Apparatus for Facilitating the Birth of a Child by Centrifugal Force

Basically, you take a huge concrete block with a giant turntable on it and strap the prospective mother down. You strap a net between her knees & spin her round until the baby pops out. I have a feeling this may have been George Blonsky's idea!!

If you must know more, I'll put a link on my personal space.

Ugi

We've every sort of gadget now,
for every sort of chore.
But it's much more work and worry
than it ever was before

There's cables on the tables,
with plugs of every shape.
And what we save in elbow-greese
We spend on insulating tape.

(Fanders and Swann (1955 ish)) - http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/A417142

Hang on...

Are you saying that all babies aren't normally born this way?

Frankly, I shocked.

Hang on...

Are you saying that all babies aren't normally born this way?

Frankly, I'm shocked.

On earth, at least, the weight of tradition seems to be against it. Can't think why.

Ugi
(not wanting to think about cleaning up afterwards )

Then, you keep the resulting baby in a Skinner box,and bring her up according to the principlesof behaviourism. Or, watch Lexx, the Dark Zone for details...