h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Earlier tonight, well friday, I realised that I had no food and that I needed to go to the shop if I wanted to eat anything. Anyway, While at the shop I had to put up with some blonde chav bird coming on to me with her three kids running around and her ugly fat chav mate asking me inane questions while her kid kept telling me how nice my hat is... damn stupidn gun laws

You're not on minimum wage serving them cheap stella and vodka red bull. On my first Saturday shift I had some middle aged chav commenting on my crotch....

*vomits*

*zips her mouth shut*


I'm soooooo tempted to say so much but I won't


you can both have a instead

Well both those stories are kinda creepy in their own special way.

I actually think we are very fortunate not to have access more easier to legally own guns in the UK, well I think I am lucky that we do not; otherwise I'd be a regular mass murderer every time I go to the pub, and encounter those moronic idiots who insist on yelling at each other, when the pub isn't even that loud (till they begin shouting conversations at each other whilst standing twelve inchs apart) and as for chavs and the moronic idiots (who no doubt are the ones shouting in the pub earlier in the evening), who then come walk down my road, tip over the dustbins, break wing mirrors off cars as you can see.... I'd certainly be a mass murdrere by now were the laws in the UK much differnt so have a from me, and remember, The fact we can look down on the poor sniffling little chaves and chavettes means we are lucky ourself not to be part of their evil brethernin

Yeah. The prison's don't need any more people in them. And you'd be missed round here too I'm sure.

If you need a hand with put downs give me a call TB

Can't imagine such a chat-up technique working anywhere. Why would you ever think it would?

Take up kickboxing...No licence needed...

*Dream of a mod for Grand Theft Auto that turns all the pedestrians into chavs.*

I liked his hat too..

Right.....

it's a nice hat

What was it like?