h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Okay... well, school sucks, my brother's a pain... and well, I hav'ta vent. And what makes it all worse is that my brother's birthday is two days from now... (April 25th) and well, he's even worse on his birthday, 'cause he has this impression he can rule the whole world on his birthday, which is a load of bull!

On a better note we got a new monitor for my computer... so well, I can see stuff again! Woohoo! I just hated being blind due to a monitor that was burninmg itself out fast.... now the only things left to replace on the computer is the CPU and the keyboard... I'm hoping my dad gives in and replace the CPU soon... but I'll probably save up enough money to build my own computer before he gives in, and admits this computer's too old! It's four years old, as of last friday... (4/20, yuck!) and it's has a "genuine pentium" (read as dinosaur!).

Well, I'm currently hunting for a prom date... and I'll hav'ta put out an ad soon.... it'd read something like this... "17 year old female searching for a (preferably cute) prom date that is 20 years old, or younger, and located in the San Francisco bay area. Please apply to me with a list of qualifications and a good picture. All applicants who seem okay will be contacted for further information". Hehe... but then I'd probably get every sicko, psycho, and nut case applying, and I'd be better off asking one of my guy friends at school to do with me... and hope that I don't put any impressions that we're anything but friends in their head, and leave myself to sort out that mess. I already know what dress I want to wear... it's a really cool one from Hot Topic. It's burgandy velvet, and it had bell sleves that are made of "burned out" velvet in the bell part... it's really pretty... I just hav'ta find it in the right size... *Shrugs* I'm sure I can get it to work out.

Well, I have a "homework assignment" from my mom's fiancee to work out a budget so that I would be able to live alone if I moved out of the house at 18, and continued to live in this over inflated housing market of the bay area.... Any one with tips and tricks to offer, I'll gladdly listen to the advice... I was thinking, my best bet is to split, or share an apartment with a friend... might softly the blow of the cost of housing itself... then I hav'ta worry about food, gas, insurance, and all that other lovely junk... *shrugs* I'm sure I'll figure something out... and well, at least I don't think I'll have to be depending on my little pay check from Radio Shack to be supporting me through that yet... I dont' work enough hours, and I don't know well enough what I'm doing to be able to do that well enough yet. Maybe after a year or 15, I'll be able to carry myself on that pay check... but the thing is, my plans look like the US Air Force right now... so I won't be at Radio Shack for 15 consistant years quite yet... at most it looks like maybe nearly 5 years, assuming plans contniue the way they seem to be going at the moment. Oh well... Life's tough... but I'll make the best of it.

Well, I'm sure I've bored you all out of your minds by now... so I'll wrap this up... Bu-bye!

Saturn Girl,
Here are some helpful tips on finding a prom date:

First-- Get two water balloons. Hand them to your possible date.
If he squishes them... think about asking someone else. If he squeezes them to the point that they pop... definately ask someone else. If he throws them at you... ask someone bigger, then have them beat him up. If he holds them gently, ask him to the prom.

Second-- Ask him who his heroes are. If he says Eminem or Marilyn Manson...RUN. If he says his mom, or dad, or someone who probably wouldn't eat the family pet and/or scare small children... ask him out.

Third-- Find out what he thinks he'll be doing in 5 years. If he says working as a telemarketer, get his number, and call him when you know he'll be eating, sleeping or watching his favorite television program. If he says finishing college, take him to the prom.

Forth-- Ask him to your house. If he gets along with your parents, keep him. If he gets along with your brother, drop him.

Fifth-- Most Important! Find someone who's dated him in the past. If she describes him as an octopus the minute they were alone, forget him. If he opened doors for her, keep him. If she tells you she broke up with him because he was too nice, take him to the prom. If she says he broke up with her because he got what he wanted and decided to move on to his next "victim", take someone else.

Hope this helps. If all else fails, go with one of your female friends. Sure, it'd be nice to go with Mr. Perfect. But they probably already have a date. And you'd have more fun with a friend than with someone whose hands you'll have to be watching the entire night.
Above all, (and I say this in case your parents forget), Be safe, and have fun!