h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

1) No, I can be very unreasonable when I want to. I guess my difficulty with your stance is that what it leads to me is me seeing a stream of traffic wardens as victims of assault. Traffic wardens and Gypsies are the last people whom it is still socially acceptable to assault just 'because'.

2) That was a bit of a lash up, wasn't up? I just hope everybody sees sense and leaves Whelan to his legal madness on his own. I certainly can't see Fulham being interested now.

It will be interesting to see what happens when the first trial takes place for someone accused of beating to death a warden over them issuing a ticket. I'm sure that a provocation defense will be wheeled out pretty smartish. And then I guess the nightmare scenario would be if one of the jurers got a ticket during the course of the procedings.

Relegation? Tevez? Dodgy contracts? Yes, some lawyers are going to get paid over the summer. Nothing will change obviously, as you can't have a 'big London club' relegated over a smaller provincial one. Heigh-ho, we'll just add one more chip to our shoulders - we've got plenty there, almost enough to make a Greasy Chip Butty

Well, speaking as a 'middling' London club (17,000 season tickets already sold for next year) I don't think we have much to complain about. The knee-jerk sacking of Dowie and the ludicrous appointment of Les Reed did for us and left Pardew with far too much work to do. 3 points less on West Ham's books wouldn't have saved us because with a few notable exceptions (stuffing West Ham 4-0 amongst them ), we've been a bago'sh*t* this season and deserve to go down.

And frankly I'm kind of looking forward to it. At least this season won't the usual - 'well, it'll be a good result if we can hold United to under 3 at home' type of stuff.