h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

"Kate Middleton in labour as world waits"


Well, no, actually. The world has many, many other things to worry about right now and most of it isn't waiting on one woman screaming "Never again you bastard, where's my epidural!!!" at her husband right now. I'm a royalist and I make no apologies for that, but I'm so glad I'm not in the UK right now. The coverage is going to be sickening and virtually unavoidable.

I seem to have said 'right now' an awful lot of times in that post

I blame 2legs.

I appreciated this image when it came across my facebook feed this weekend.

http://lolsnaps.com/news/73060/0/

Nice

The American public were all over the royals until Diana died. Interest has waned somewhat since then.

You wouldn't think so watching the morning shows and the evening news.

Really? I hadn't realised it was still such a draw. Oh well, when you've got hours and hours of TV time to fill and no-one really wants to watch anything stimulating or brain-taxing, I suppose more royal triviality is as good as anything.

It's a boy.

You can relax now, Gosho.


Geggs

It was the ultimate moment when they actually said, "well, we don't have any news about the baby, but..." and then just started talking about how many other journalists were there.

If you admit there isn't any news to tell, how about...y'know...taking it off "The News" and covering something else?

Yep, and Mitch Benn is going to town tweeting and retweeting about it

@ComedyKevioni
Reports that Kate is doing well, of course she's doing well, she's married to a prince

@OldRoberts953
They should call it Morrissey, just to annoy him.

@ChrisBrosnahan
Unconfirmed rumours that the royal baby is currently naked and surrounded by women in nurses outfits. Harry would be proud.

@MitchBenn
Whatever happens we won't see the Royal Baby today. They've got to feed him a mouse and zip him into his little human suit first.

@MitchBenn
Congrats to W & K (C?) and welcome aboard to Prince Loki Elvis Keanu. Right, now about this porn business...

And from Mark Gatiss:

@Markgatiss
IT'S ALIVE!!

Oh, how adorably optimistic of you KB

I wonder what bad news is slipping under the radar today. Over here it's been nothing but Zimmerman and baby bump for weeks.

I see Cameron is trying to clean up the internet over there.

I'm sure the Koch brothers, Goldman Sachs or Disney is doing something quite evil today. Probably all three.

Oh yeah, Disney is being evil. Have you heard about Infinity?


Geggs

Yeah, isn't it ironic that on the day that Cameron announces plans to fight porn, the entire country has its gaze (figuratively) focused on one woman's lady garden, and the reason they're doing that is because of what happens in porn?

To be fair, I think we should spare a thought for the poor saps who have to try and fill a 24 hour news channel when something like this happens, and they've got to go on and on and on and on about it for hours. For the first ten or 15 minutes it's quite exciting, but after that... well, how many times can you say the same thing, ask yet another guest for their reaction, find someone else with anything - ANYTHING - of interest to say that hasn't already been said

Apparently the Daily Fail won the internet irony award today with a self congratulatory piece on their front page regarding Cameron's porn crackdown juxtaposed by their typical flesh laden side bar.

https://twitter.com/frasernelson/status/359288421044334592/photo/1

http://twitter.com/frasernelson/status/359288421044334592/photo/1

This is the kind of unimportant trivia being put on the back burner:

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/is-there-no-limit-to-what-this-government-will-privatise-uk-plasma-supplier-sold-to-us-private-equity-firm-bain-capital-8718029.html

Thank BoB my only coverage of the whole thing, was by the wonderfully warmped and weird minds of the people I follow on twitter. I've written to the relivent people to suggest the baby should be called Sue... I thin kthey'll go for it

A king named Sue

The former Mrs Gosho had to explain to me the significance of all the 'Joffrey' tweets.

I've just realised that I've slipped from being 42,566,758th in line to the throne to 42,566,759. I'm very depressed