h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I may be a handsome, handsome man, but I am also an Ugly American. I feel very conscious of the fact that I'm a California boy, surrounded by a vast sea of Anglophiles and actual, er, Angles. English. Whatever. (I can tell by the way you put all those unnecessary "u"s in the middle of perfectly harmless words like "color", or invert the last two letters in "center".)

As I write, I find myself absorbing and reflecting British propriety in my prose. Which is fine, I can be every bit as stilted and mannered as the BBC requires of its newscasters. But is it at the loss of my own identity? Must I resist the urge to spit on the floor and sneer at your warm beer and bellow "hella wicked slammin stoopid fresh whazzzupp"? (Or words to that effect.)

I'll let the situation dictate for now. Peace out, y'all.

Hello, welcome to h2g2! I just wanted to stop by and say hi and I noticed you are from CA. What part if I may ask? I used to live in the SF Bay Area... And I always like to find other Californians.

Hello and thanks for your message. I'm amazed at how many people have already contacted me. Makes me feel like I'll enjoy it here.

I'm also from the Bay Area. San Bruno, to be exact. I don't know how long you lived here or how well you know the area, but San Bruno is basically right across the freeway from the SF airport. I've been here about a dozen years, since leaving Southern California to attend Cal. Where did you live? And why on earth would you leave the Bay Area? Would you like me to tell you what the weather is like here today? I won't, because it will only fill you with jealousy and remorse.

Well I used to live in Hayward and the only reason I left CA was to go to school. A Christian University to be exact. And I thought it would be a good place to go to school, here in TX. Please don't tell me what the weather is like. I will be jealous.... Here it's hot and muggy and we don't have Air Conditioning... Someday I hope to go back!

Speaking as an Englishman, I think I can safely say that centre is in fact written in this way: centre. And Colour does have a 'u'. So there. And Theatre.

After all, we invented the language. If I had my way, I'd copyright it, and charge you vast amounts to use it. hehe.



No offence, BTW

Well I disagree. I think (as an American) that we are right. But all cultures are valid in their own way! I'm taking an anthropology class and learning all about things like cultural validity...

Bah humbug I say! You may have invented English but we speak good ol fashioned American over here. And you'd all be speaking German if we hadn't saved you in WW2 (etc, etc, trailing off into incoherent ranting and raving, waving the Stars and Stripes, saluting mom, baseball and apple pie, etc).

PS No offense taken.

PPS Notice how I spell offense.

Explain to me hust who 'mom' is. Because I can't understand that language of yours.

Ich kann Deutsch auch sprechen, and the Russians one the war anyway

sorry, won the war

Ich kann nicht Deutsches sprechen, aber ich kann mich vortäuschen tue, indem ich den Internet-Übersetzer verwende.

That should say something like, "I can not speak German, but I can pretend I do by using the Internet translator." But knowing the Internet translator, it's probably not quite right.

And mom means mummy.

By the way Uncle, I need tips on superheroing/battling. I came in right in the middle of things, not quite sure what our goals/methods are. CHOMPERS uber alles!

OK then: What we have to do is beat the superheros. They, on the other hand, have to beat us. Every hero and villain should have a 'super battle' forum in their page, with the first entry a brief description of yourself. We have to go to the villain's forums and place a fish, done like this > < > but without the spaces. Once the dastardly villain has three fishes, he is frozen until one of his side places a winking smiliy in their forum. If he notices that he has been fished once or twice, he can give himself a winking smilie, as can any of his teammates. Simple, see? the villains can do this to us, so we have to monitor as many of the heros battle forums as possible. Capische?

We're called CHOPPERS. Apparently because it means we cut down stumps. Isn't that logical.

PS I do know what mom meant
PPS I can say words like naughty without you knowing what I mean

Blimey!!!
You're all CHOPPERS?????
We don't call each other that in polite company!
(Now I think I know what Mom meant....8^D...harhar)
ps why can't Americans say "mirror"?
atb...Amigo

Hey, Amigo, come and join choppers, and you, tomthedog, we need your help, we're all frozen...