h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

As the resident feline entity (bar greebo perhaps, but she is only halfcat)I feel inclined to communicate with fellow cats.If u wanna no anythin' gimme a bell-I have above average research options......

Thanks for looking in...

By the the way, I have no ambitions to become the resident cat, I'll just find myself a quiet corner and watch...

nim

Also, "nim" in Persian means "half".

again,
nim

Fair cop.
well by resident I more meant, residing in as opposed to being in any way dominent.

You could also rope in Fashion Cat, Greebo the 'Kat' & Alicat for a 'purrfect' night out...

Great idea!

Only, as I am the new cat arround here, wouldn't it better for the chief cat to throw the party?

And will there be nice people to scratch our backs ?

nim

I'll have a word with Greebo Senior...

Hello nim. You passed by the bar a few minutes ago (empty apart from me), so I thought I would return your greeting. I am employed by the resident cat at my house. She also wanders in and out according to her own rules.

Perhaps you can help me in my research on cats. I have studied them for years, and observed a phenomenon for which I have no explanation. I call it *feline intellectual osmosis*. Whenever someone is working on documents, the documents get spread around. A cat, on entering the room, always knows which is the most important document, and sits down on it - presumably absorbing the information. How do they know?

*floating in, in her usual vague, elf-like manner*

Greetings, nim the cat!

Just wanted to pay you a visit since you have visited me...

May the be with you

*drifting off, in her usual v.e.l.manner*

Thanks for looking in, Kes!

Cats always know which is the most important document. They do not absorb the information because they know that already too. It just gives them a feeling of power lying on it, because before going on with your work you have get the cat to agree to get up.

Hope I have helped.

nim

Thank you. It's obvious (once pointed out by a superior intelligence). I hadn't realised they already knew it. Of course it makes sense now.

A bit of almost useless information: Did you know that Newton is credited with the invention of the cat flap - so that he could displace his cat from his papers and study with minimum fuss!

I KNEW I didn't like that Newton fellow, now I know why!!!

But this story doesn't fit with the one that he had a dog named Diamond who tore up one of his researches (???)

nim (don't dare to use a cat flap on me !!!)

Indeed I would not. I know that one of my most important functions is to open doors (that I shouldn't have shut ion the first place) as required and requested

There is supporting evidence of Newton's involvement (though it also shows he wasn't a genius at everything). He got a carpenter to cut a cat-sized hole in the bottom of his study door, so his cat could come and go. Later, when a kitten arrived, Newton had a second, kitten-sized hole cut in the door!!!

well, the worst has to be Schrodinger.... putting a cat in a box with a bomb and not knowing if its alive or dead....

Greetings Nim! God sent me round with apologies, He's gone off for a rest for a few weeks, and whispered in my ear there was a gathering of pussy cats.... and here i am!

fancy some cream anyone?

Quite unconscionable ... and it wasn't even his cat. It was the cat that owned Heisenberg. Never did like Schro. and his "wavicles".
I just happen to have some of those dried fishy-flavoured little biscuits on me - bought 'em for my cat, but I'm sure she'll let me share a few around. There - enjoy, ladies.

Next cat question (but this is rhetorical, I don't know if there's a known answer):
Why did the musical Cats leave out the only TSE entry for an identifiably real cat? (The one at his publishers - the last entry in the Book)

(nim serves cream, ice cream, milk, liver, donuts (in case Greebo drops by) and tries to remember what she has forgotten)

I don't know Kes, you got me all at sea there. That's one of the drawbacks of living in Iran : i f you do not have internet, satelite receiver and a prompt book service from outside, you could as well be living on the moon.

really? I didnt know that..... maybe he wasnt fashionable enough.... though i have to say CATS is one of the worst musicals i've seen.... I absolutely detested it!

Agreed. Wanted to see it; waited for ages for it to reach this end of the Universe; paid small fortune to see it; was totally disappointed. Then re-read book to restore faith.
Enjoy your party. I may drop in to offer the occasional behind-ear scratch, if required.

~Greebo appears and considers the question.. which half of her is not cat... grin~


Hmmm... doughnuts... ~bigger grin~... thoughtfully provided...

I'm back (pant) malibu is obligatory