h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

There are three Kias in this small. village and every time I see one I think of you and hope things are not impossible. Life really isn't fair, is it?
I find it increasingly difficult to look on the bright side all the time and really admire the way you seem to keep your spirits so upbeat. Good wishes.

Hi WS

Do you mean "Ka" (which is what I drove? I have a horror of seeing my old car pass me while I'm walking to Mum's. It would break my heart all over again! All of the carers who visit Mum have expressed surprise when they've turned up and found me there, their response was "I didn't see your car?" and I've had to tell the same tale of woe again. I think, after a month, they all know now. My sister and younger brother have had to take over the shopping for Mum, which I think they didn't expect, but they've both gone off on holidays abroad at the same time so I had to do it last week. Silly me chose Sunday morning and I found to my horror that there's no Sunday service *after* I had staggered to the bus stop with £60-worth of shopping in and on my shopper. I should have just phoned a taxi but I thought it would be no different from walking what I usually do, but... it was heavy and it took me a while to recover. Yesterday I bit the bullet and ordered my first online shop, delivery charge £2, will be delivered Monday afternoon 2pm!

There's been one upside that I hadn't forseen. I'm walking there and back, 3,200 steps each way. I signed up to the new Doctor's surgery on Taylor's Avenue (the old Lynton pub) as I can no longer get to Clee Medical (corner of Suggitt's Lane). I had a medical with their HCA and my weight was 4lb less than it was when I last weighed myself. My legs ache though

I think the worst thing in all this has been the attitude of my siblings. The oldest one, who visits once-in-a-blue-moon, brings flowers and takes Mum out to lunch, then goes home again, couldn't afford a holiday abroad this year due to the expense of their house extension (I had to fight to stem the tears). I half expected him to offer to help me, being the one with the bulk of caring for our mother, but no, yet if the situation had been reversed I would have done my utmost to help the sibling charged with such heavy responsibility. I don't feel like I've got a fair deal and if Mum lives to 100 I will be 65 then and not up to dashing across Taylor's Avenue (40mph speed limit) or dodging cyclists on the path outside Lindsey School. But I am protecting our inheritance by caring for Mum at home and we will have a house to sell so it's not all bleak - I may get another car when this caring role is over, but I don't want to think about that yet. Life isn't fair, I agree, but I am better off than some in my acquaintance, I'm still mobile if not fast, reasonably healthy, and happy in my private life. I've always been more "count your blessings" than curse fate in the bad times, it really does help you get through dips in fortune. The wheel will turn in my favour but I won't forget who helped/offered to, and those who stood by and did nothing.

Take care of yourself WS, and keep in touch

Thank you for the long reply. Your siblings don't know how lucky they are, not least in having you instead of me for a sister. I would be so furious so often, but that wouldn't help your mother would it?
I have slowed down so far that the boss in Lincoln said perhaps I should stop going until after the op. This would ruin my life, so I've negotiated shorter hours and will keep going as long as possible.
Various (expensive) things happened to the house last week, including new guttering, which meant that the Virginia Creeper I've spent years nurturing had to mostly depart, but I did get to see its glorious red this year. The local builder has done so much for me over the last 30 years that he now feels able to use my first name.
When I was hobbling home from Bingo on Thursday, a young woman who helps run it said she would come and looks after me if I wanted to do the op earlier. Definitely she would do my shopping. I am truly blessed.
Actually I'll get to the end of my (free) weightwatchers course before
I think about that again. I was given a prescription for it! The weight is coming off really slowly but, more importantly, my blood sugar levels have gone down like an express lift and I've been able to cut the insulin by nearly half. I will make more effort to stop whinging. I was brought up to be stoic and actually only moan to myself or, very occasionally, to one of my sons. I think the only possible answer to "How are you?" is "Fine thanks." but I'll try to really mean it.
Enjoy having the shopping delivered. Have a nice cuppa before putting it all away. I hope the wheel turns just a bit faster.
With admiration

I have found in all the hard times that it helps to count your blessings. Also, I have friends who have suffered through ill-health and losses, so there's always someone I know who is worse off than me. That makes me feel a little selfish for indulging in feeling sorry for myself, and gives me a kick up the bum to get on with my lot because I'm only here right now because of every decision I have ever made. I know some things happen which we have no control over, but then I believe in Earth Angels sent to help in adverse times - case in point the young woman who offered to help with your shopping. You should accept her offer as there will come a day when she needs help and the wheel will turn.



That's great that you've lost some weight and brought your blood condition under controlI'm pleased I passed the urine dipper test and also my blood pressure was normal. My legs ache from all the walking but it's a case of "no pain, no gain" - I've never had this much exercise and am determined to take full advantage. If Mum lives to 100, I'm going to be back to my pre-children weight!

Take care of yourself and maybe we'll meet up again one day.