h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

anyone else?
greetings from Wolfsburg

Yes I am from Germany and it looks as though we're gonna have to put a lot of things straight in this guide - the info on Germany doesn't coincide with what I have found out in 24 years of living here - and we must get them to correct the handy German phrases, not just waffle on about them.

All that stuff about Hamburg might be right, but I've only been there on visits and it certainly doesn't apply down South where I live. People have to have explained to them that Germany consists of a haphazard group of races bundled together in one federation and is no more homogenous than Britain, the US, or the ex-USSR and you can't generalise. There seem to be some intelligent people on this site, so let's not leave them misinformed.

In the next few days I shall try and make some entries with substance. ....

Thanks guys! You have been added1

Any of you Germans know anything about a place called Ingolstadt near Munich because I'm British. I've lived in the same place all of my life and know I'm going to live over there for a year in about a month. I can barely speak a word of the language. In other words help!!!

Hi Acheron!
Don't worry, Germany isn't a bad place to stay. All I know about Ingolstadt is, that it lies close to the autobahn A9, and that Opel comes from there. (I guess that's the reason your going, hm?). But from what I've heard it must be a lovely, "typical german" town. For further information about living in Germany, don't hesitate to ask.

Dear Chaos. It's not Opel (that's in Ruesselsheim) it's Audi. Ingolstadt is in Bavaria, and although I don't know the place either, you must beware because all of Bavaria is defiantly and militantly Catholic. The Bavarians, in my experience are very much Pashas and treat their women quite badly. The Free State of Bavaria is also very conservative, having its own political party. It has a very strong dialect and a very high standard of education, so if you're taking children there, leave them until they've finished school.

Would be very glad to help learning the language, but I don't know how that can be done as I live a long way away. People will be very nice about speaking English to you, and you will probably find the standard quite high. Try and find students or schoolkids to maybe come and do jobs for you and you can offer to teach them English in return, surreptitiously using them to learn German. Or simply offer English lessons for German lessons.

The beer in Bavaria is notoriously strong, be careful about that.

The red tape is incredible. You have to register with the local authorities to live here, and get a residence permit (but I should check up on that one, the laws might have changed). It is not necessary to register with the local Consulate. This just has the advantage that if anything happens to you while you are in Germany, and you have some means of identification with you (presumably British or similar), the police can contact you via the nearest relative as registered at the Consulate.

Do try and learn the language as quickly as possible. Always carry a dictionary and/or something to write with. And join a class. This may be organised for you if you are working or a student or an au pair. It is also a good place to meet people of the opposite - or even the same - sex - who you can speak in your mother tongue to. And start learning before you leave. Practice converting prices into your own currency so you don't get caught out shopping.

If you're coming from Britain, you will miss:

Tea (bring at least 1000 teabags - this is well over the limit, but hardly likely to be discovered, if they are all in separate socks.
Branston pickle
Dettol
Marmite
Radio (bring tape recordings of Radio 4 programmes and make sure someone back there in blighty can keep you supplied.
smoked haddock

(Others are welcome to enlarge on this list... can't wait to see what you all write)

In Germany give the following things a try:

- Coffee flavoured with vanilla, chocolate, and exotic things like amaretto, orange cream, cherry, .... are available in sachets. Surprised these are still not available in England, where on the other hand they have the sachets of cocoa with orange and mint flavours.
- Sauerkraut you must try. It is absolutely vital to counteract the inordinate amounts of pork the Germans eat. They also add mustard, which has the same effect of breaking down the fat. Sauerkraut must be cooked for at least an hour, you can't just pop it in the microwave.
- the Bavarian form of meat is Haxen - a leg of pork
- Beer here in Germany is subject to the rigorous "Reinheitsgesetz" which forbids any additives. Once got used to, it's probably quite addictive.
- riding a tram
- a football match (?) have never been, but it must be a good way of meeting people and you'd have something in common, if it's your sort of thing.
- Try and find a cinema which shows the films in the original version - or at least the original version with subtitles - watch out for "OV" (means Originalversion) or "OmU" - Original mit Untertiteln - original with subtitiles.

Do take notice of what it rather patronisingly says about separating your rubbish somewhere else on this site. It is a perfectly sensible and normal thing to do. Find out exactly what the local system is. You separate tins, plastic packaging, glass, paper, biological stuff for composting, and the rest produces about a small bag per week. Where possible try and avoid it altogether by using returnable bottles, buying fruit & veg loose, etc, etc., as it may be charged by weight.

People are shocked about the price of petrol now just having topped the 2 DM mark. It is cheaper from "Freie T" petrol stations or from the stations attached to supermarkets. It is almost always self service.

So that's a few points to be going on with. Hope I was of help. Any more questions fire away - either here or on my home page.

Acheron - you still there? Need any more help?

Just to say that I'm here now and settled in, thanks for the information. My PC decided to have a fit the week before I came over and its only now that I've realized how accommodating the company are to web access that I've come back to the site.

Just to say that I'm here now and settled in, thanks for the information. My PC decided to have a fit the week before I came over and its only now that I've realized how accommodating the company are to web access that I've come back to the site.

Hey wow! After all this time!.

Check out Bossel - he lives in Munich: http://www.h2g2.com/U132240

His English is very good and if you need a guide/drinking partner maybe he can help!

Indeed, fancy that!
Thanks, TC, for already giving the essentials of living in bavaria!
Well, you might already have discovered that Ingolstadt is a beautiful little town (if you stick to the medieval center), and a quite modern one at the same time (regarding the suburbs). I've been there only once, but I love it. Now as christmas is approaching, there should be something like a 'Weihnachtsmarkt' coming up, a market set up a little south from the shopping zone, with lots of hoods selling everything from 'Lebkuchen' (gingerbread), christmas gifts, 'Glühwein' (hot tea + rum + lemon + cinnamon, delicious, but be careful with that!), and lots of fancy stuff. Audi has a very informative tour for visitors, with Nicholas Gunn music played at the laser show. Another thing you should not miss is the forensic museum!

*blushes, embarrassed*

I hope I didn't exaggerate about the Bavarians there. As a "Zugroister" you will be able to confirm some, even.

And there are some Bavarians that even I admire. I have a ticket for Bruno Jonas who is playing near us tomorrow night, and who I think is absolutely fantastic.

How sweet you are looking, flushed!
But I didn't mean to embarrass you, in no way. Expats from abroad see things as they are, because for them it's a difference. For us things here are just self-evident and not worth a thought.

Do you mean by "us" you count yourself as a fully-fledged Bavarian?

Well, didn't receive a bavarian membership/citizenship paper, but with close to 10 years in bavaria now, I hope I am entitled to 'impatriation' by now. Some 18 years ago I had the choice between Hamburg and Munich, and choose Munich simply because a) I wanted to be on the other side of the Autobahn when holiday traffic would set in, and b) I liked Munich better than Hamburg. But now I just love it.

I just got back from Bruno Jonas. He was great. Laughed ourselves silly we did. I went on my own because my husband's away. Even if he was here he wouldn't have the faintest idea who Bruno Jonas is. I felt pleased with myself that I understood more of his dialect than some of the people sitting round me did. Not bad for a foreigner who has never even been to Bavaria, eh? (Well I once spent a weekend in Garmisch-Partenkirchen with a group of American Girl Scouts, but didn't hear much German there!)

BJ couldn't stop himself at one stage pointing out that the Palatinate used to be Bavarian - but he did it so nicely he still got a laugh.

I must admit that I don't know him. But go ahead with that entry, I am looking forward to it.