h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Don't we realize that, or don't we want to kill people?

"We" being you and the rest of the androids, I'm assuming.

In which case I'm not fit to answer the question, as I'm not a robot. Apparently I am a work of fiction (and rather a good one if I do say so myself, which, as usual, I do) but I'm almost certain that I am a carbon-based one. Because in the past week I've cut two of my fingers with X-acto knives, and both of them bled a little bit. I think they should have bled more, but they still bled enough for me to be almost certain that I am not in fact a robot.

Robots don't bleed at all, and they don't like bananas, I'll bet.

I like bananas.

Oh, but if it's the other, then yes, of course.

I appreciate your lengthy, verbose clarification of this concept, not only for the education of Guide users, but for the sheer entertainment value of such a windy, pointless missive. I look forward to more of same.

Kzin

I know you do.

If I ever say anything as terse, limited and without discernable meaning again... well, I don't know what, but I'm going to go on for a bit about exactly what sort of thing it would be, even though I don't knnow what it is precisely, just to make the point.

Oh, look, no I'm not! I don't need to!

You see? This is much better.

You are a strange little girl, Kristina. Will you go out with me? =D

I was about to say 'no,' but then I realized that that would be entirely too brief, so I guess I shall have to rework that a bit. Only I don't want to be too terribly nasty because I don't know you, and what if you turn out to be influential in some galaxy I've not been to yet? Where would I be then, I ask you? So I guess that all things considered 'no' is just going to have to do, because I have no idea with whom I am dealing.

Probably all the better, I suppose. If it makes you feel any better, I am the delegate to Falayalaralfali. When the Arilou'Laleelay come to band with us in the war in 2135, it'll be guys like me who saved Earth's bacon. But oh well. I won't cry.

That sounds fantastically heroic, if you take out the bits about fictional places and pork products and the basic frivolity and futility in saving a planet like this one. I for one probably wouldn't go too far out of my way. I mean, sure, I'd make an effort, but I probably wouldn't put my life on the line or anything, like the guys in every space adventure disaster movie ever made. It's just not worth it when you can leave and have done with it instead, knowing that anybody else worth the carbon it took to make him would do the same.

Not that I don't like the Earth, or for that matter fictional places and people. In fact I myself, as I may have mentioned, and probably have, am fictional, and I find me rather delightful.

exactly. why do you think i asked you out? ::grin::

I know you don't really want me to answer that.

all this, and psychic too! marry me!

I wish you the best of luck in your quest, if you're bent on it, because as far as I can tell, you're a madman. Woman. Thing, I don't know. But you're mad.

*comes crashing in through the virtual wall*

Hey, everybod-

*crashes through opposite virtual wall, never to be seen in the same thread again*

comes in through the hole in the virtual wall but doesn't have to crash as it is still wide open!!

Kia Ora Kzin, and Kristina Marie !

Well, I'm not sure quite how that happened, but now that I'm here;
I don't suppose that either of you wrote Schoolgirl Poems along the lines of the definition I have on my H2G2 Homepage, or that if you have, that you would consider submitting them for publication and inclusion there..???

Ossario T'an
:^)#

leaves via the hole in the opposite virtual wall without having to crash as it too is still wide open!!

So you can be a fictional construct AND a hologram? And if you are x-actoed do you not bleed holographic blood?

Which is, in effect, neither here nor there in the cartographic topography of this discussion, but the original assertion is merely a heads up about trusting too much of your fate to robots. Just a friendly reminder that it's never too early to buy a little robot insurance...

(More on this later)

^..^

Bravo, well said.

I'm not sure what you said, but you sure said it well.