h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hello! I have been away for the past 8 weeks so I thought I would come over and say hello. Hello. Could you find it in your heart to patch this hole in my wing?

Welcome back BB! Consider the wing fixed...

*Runs off to grab her hubby's superglue and staple gun*

Why for you be gone for 8 whole weeks???? Not spending time in one of Her Majesty's institutions, I hope?

I was working away from home On a little island called Nantucket. There wasn't a computer around so I have fallen very far behind things here. I am a law abiding citizen of the u.s.a......well, I just haven't been caught yet I suppose.

I'll have to look Nantucket up on a map! It sounds like something related to Friar Tuck in the Robin Hood story! I'm intrigued anyhow..... What were you doing there, if you don't mind my asking?

I didn't realise you lived in the U.S. - I guess one shouldn't take it for granted that someone's in the same country as yourself on h2g2 (U.K. in my case). It's something I frequently forget!

Nantucket is a small island off of the south coast of Massachusetts. The wind neverstops blowing and it is populated almost entirely by (multi) millionaires....and fishermen. I was painting houses (not fun).

Not if they are other people's houses!

Our's is 100 years old this year and we've been renovating it since 1992 as it was derelict and had been empty for 5 years when we moved in. It's in a old ex-mining village in County Durham and is an end of terrace. John has done all the work himself, when we can afford it. It's like a cross between a toy shop, zoo and building site!

My house is even older than that. Add about one hundred more years! Weeven have two of the ofiginal windows in the front room. The blown glass windows are very difficult to see out of and there is a constant draft. The place needs loads of work. So much in fact that we have been hoping for a hurricane to come along and blow our monstrous willow down on it and build a new one with the insurance money.

The house doesn't sound very cozy! Where abouts is your home?

We had to replace our old windows which was a shame really as they were the original sash windows with coloured leaded lights in them. We had double glazed windows installed that resemble sash windows from the outside although the top half of the window opens outwards instead of sliding. If we'd had enough money, we could have had the leaded lights installed in the centre of the double glazing, but it would have cost heaps more.

The place we used to own, in Hampshire, and John renovated which we sold in 1990 when we emigrated to New Zealand (we returned to the UK in 1992 as things didn't work out), was a 16th century thatched cottage with flint and chalk walls. It was fantastic and even had it's own well in the garden and was a "listed" building. Unfortunately, it burned down a couple of months ago when some idiot let the thatch catch light, probably through not having their chimney swept. It was part of a row of 5 terraced thatched cottages and the whole lot are nothing but a charred ruin. Apparently, it made the television news and lots of local papers as it took four fire crews over 19 hours to keep the blaze under control. All John's hard work gone! We're almost as upset as if we'd been still living there which is just as well, as we didn't have any contents insurance because the thatch roof made it too expensive, for obvious reasons!

I do hope I haven't given you any ideas about house insurance!

I was just kidding about the insurance thing. The house needs cosmetic work. Lots of paint and a new roof for starters.

If you look at a map of the U.S. and find Massachusetts (I have lived here all my life and I'm still not sure if I am spelling that correctly!) There is a tiny little hook of land all the way over to the east called Cape Cod. "A quaint little drinking village with a fishing problem," a bumper sticker says. I live in the dead center of the Cape. A town called West Dennis.

I'll check out my maps when I log off (thanks). I'm not very good at geography! Have you heard of a camp disk jockey turned comedian and used to have his own t.v. show, called Kenny Everet, who unfortunately died from AIDS a couple of years ago? Thanks to his sketch impersonating the Bee-Gees and their song "Massachusetts", which he managed to reconfigure to "Massive Chew Sets" (the joke being that they all had rather large teeth), I can never say the name "Massachesetts" properly any longer!

I think my better half has given up on renovations for a while as he's been playing with his boys toys in the garage (his motorcycles), in particular the ZX10. I've got bits of ZX10 distributed, with their paint drying in the living room at the moment... Well I suppose it's an excuse not to do the housework! He's even nailed some of the bits to our mantle shelf, above the fire place and they're dangling there like Christmas decorations!

What's the climate like where you are? Has spring sprung yet. It's lovely here at the moment and the bird song is incredible. We get loads of birds as we live next to a very old grave yard with lots of huge, old trees

Well, It's unseasonably warm right now....no. Make that HOT. It was nearly one hundred degrees on Sunday. I made the mistake of taking a trip to Boston for the day to see if any galleries cared to put up my paintings. No luck. I havent sweat that much in years. I prefer the cooler climates myself. We have also had some pretty intense thunderstorms this week. I always enjoy a good T-storm.

Vegan Vampire? I like it!

Hi Bear,

It took me three forums today to figure out that the Vegan Vampire was Gwennie. Duh. Mari-rae is now Bast. I'd love to see your paintings. I got your e-mail. Thanks. Did you do the artwork on your homepage? It's very good. It took me over an hour to get into h2g2 tonight. I'm off to catch up on stuff. See you in the cave.

?????? I can't believe I didn't realize the Bast thing.

Yeah, that painting is one of mine. I did it in college. It was part of a childrens book I made with my old roomate who is a graphic designer. The stuff I do now is a lot different. As soon as I get a scanner I'll let you see some of them.

I would be honoured to see your new work. I'm glad you are getting such positive feedback.

You are a very talented young man.

Hello? Another visitor? Hi Alicat!

Hey BB! I din't realise you were an artist! So, when you were painting people's houses, was this as in painting and decorating or was it something like "interior design" or what ever it's called?

My mum-in-law, Joyce is an artist and retired art teacher. Joyce attended Hornsea College of art in the 1940's. She's a luverly mum-in-law and very "bohemian"! At the moment, she just left for a month in New Zealand even though she's recovering from a recent hip replacement operation and is waiting for her other hip to be operated on! John's dad died when he was six and Joyce raised her four sons on her own whilst teaching... Sorry! I'm rambling.....

I'd LOVE to see some of your work, when you get a scanner. It may be cheaper to have any negatives of photographs taken of your work put on to a CD or floppy disc then you could load them onto your system without a scanner. The last film I had developed at my local pharmacy gave me a set of prints, an index and a CD for £9.99 (I'm not sure what that converts to in $, but I expect it'd be cheaper in the U.S. than here as most things are!).

After Alicat's mentioning the painting on your home page, I dropped by and noticed your Email address. Is it okay if I drop you a line? I'm a bit of an Email junkie!

Hope you're not too hot..... *Gwennie offers BB a long cold drinkie*

Catch you later.

Nope. It's just regular old house painting. It pays the student loans and buys paint brushes for me.

You can email me. I reply to just about everything.

I don't know whether to take that as an insult!

Be very afraid - an Email will be forthcoming!