h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

That'll be me then!

Deakie actually got a day off yesterday, yes a proper day off with no phone or hassles!

The weather was beautiful, so we went... shopping.

Now, we'd previously agreed on a casual wedding affair and I was convinced that I'd be OK wearing my favourite T-shirt, Homer Simpson shorts and 'dad sandals'. Something got changed along the way, without me being aware of it, and the up-shot is that I am now the owner of a wedding suit. Very handsome I look too, apparently. Personally, I think I look better in my birthday suit, but that's another story.

If you'd have asked me two years ago (when I was happiest in my boiler suit and laying under the Land Rovers) if I owned a such a garment, I'd have laughed at you. If you'd have asked me if I was ever likely to get married, the answer would've been "What, like being considerate and doing stuff you don't want to do and, like, having to behave? Fat chance, Pal!". Yet here I am, almost fully house-trained, with a brand new suit and a wedding day getting ever closer.

Do I regret it? Nope, not in a million years!!!

I'll leave Deaks to give you all the technical suit type details. To me it's just er, well... brown!

we definitely need details...

*gets ready to gush details!!!*

Tis a lovely suit!! It's a lovely deep chocolate brown in that superfine 'brushed so it feels velvety' heavyweight cotton. We were in and out of the shop 10 mins after spotting it and that included trying on time and me crawling on the floor turning up the legs! It's not too formal but he aint gonna look like a transient either!

All I need to get him now is a cream shirt, gold tie, new shoes and some swanky pants!!!Pheeeeew, It's hard work, this man training lark!!!

And can I just categorically state that no form of Homer Simpson-wear has EVER made it into my house and never will!

Ah, but you've not seen what I've got hidden in my secret drawer!

Honey, you HAVE no secret drawers! I'm a woman, I know where EVERYTHING is and exactly what gets brought into that house!

Aren't you supposed to break that to him *after* the wedding?

I'm an upfront kinda gal, Leo! This way, he won't be disappointed afterwards cos he knows what he's getting now!!

Deakie - don't give away all our womanly secrets!!!

I like the idea of swanky-pants though.

Not sure if I should laugh or chuck-up at the thought of D in swanky pants

I'm a swanky pants kinda man!

Er, well, at least I think I've been given permission to be...

Swanky pants, eh? Well, seeing as the old Simpsons have been banned from the forthcoming nuptials (and ever-after, so it seems) I might have to start 'getting into them'.

What I don't quite get is why I *need* swanky pants. I mean, who's gonna see them? Apart from Deaks?

Unless me and my mates perform the 'Norwich-Crew Mooning Special Styleee'...

Now there's a thought!

Hold on a sec - you mean Deakie isn't the most significant person in the entire world? Deakie *isn't* the entire world?

Deakie dear, I'd get out now.

She's trying, but I've hidden her keys!

You could always wear your swanky pants over your trousers when doing your superman impression D

But then Deaks will only see that an' all


LMAO

Bed, I'm hurt, truly hurt...

Do you mean my Superman exploits have been in vain? I thought I'd saved the world, alas it was all a dream...

Oh well, best get on with marrying Deakie then if the world no longer needs me!

Best way mate!

Let the world look after its self and keep superman for the bedroom

Wooops, my secret is out!







What's that Dear? I'm not half the man that Richard Hammond would...

Hang on Bed, I think the tap washer in the bathroom needs changing. Yep, it's at crisis level. I'll be back in a week or so...

That dosen't say much for you then D

As Hamster Hammond is only half a man does that make you a quarter of a man?

You're in trouble Bed! Deakie doesn't like slurs against her Richard...

Story of my life that


Women trouble!




I'm off to bed

Byeeee