h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I travelled to tomorrow and because I found it boring, I came back to yesterday. Then having realised that I’d been there already, I came back to today. But it wasn’t there, it had gone to tomorrow. Now if I went to tomorrow, would I find the tomorrow that was boring or go two days forward? Which wouldn’t be tomorrow then? Again! If I found that one boring as well and came back, which yesterday or today would I arrive at? While I ponder that one over, I did go back to last week three days ago. I’d had a good sleep on one of those days, so went back to have another good kip. Don’t know if it was due to jetlag or some another influence, but after I got back I was still tired. I’ve marked that one down, so not to go back to it again. There was a good side to it though, I set the freeview recorder to record a program I know will not be repeated, that I’d missed to set recording the day it was being shown, as I was watching a different channel at the time.
I don’t think I’ll bother going forward too far, as the Olympics are due soon and I’ll already be bored with virtually every channel showing the various events, repeats, best of, highlights and the following many discussions of why this and why that and he/she should have.
Looks like I’ll be forgetting that marked off one and just keep going back to last week for 6 month till it’s all over. Thinks I’ll see if anything exciting went off further back maybe, then again! I’ve forgot what I did 2 days ago, so that might have possibilities. Either way, don’t you just get bored to tears with time travel because it’s so repetitious.......

I time travelled just reading your post, prof...it's now ages into the future.

I saw that coming

Prof I would like to unwind time and find myself 4 years of age but I know what I know now and best of all my IQ gets increased by at least 100% and I am able to speak any language in the world.

think you need to add A codicil to "able to speak any language in the world." speak and understand...

Treatment is available and not expensive. Get off that windowsill Prof. you're not wearing the right pumps.

and I thought I could fly

last week wasn't there ? and as our clocks go forward 1 hour tonight/morning - it'll be around somewhere

Clocks going forward tonight = easy peasy time travel.

that's only the common versionfor the masses

...really not all that difficult, just remember that your progress through time originated in the expansive force of the big bang, that the rate of it has been increasing with passing time under the accelerating model of cosmological expansion, as in a conventional fall; that 'up' is the direction you're falling from (been there already); that 'down' is the direction you're falling toward (coming [all too] soon)...

ouch! in both past and present

Clocks going forwards! Are you ingesting the correct hallucinogens? Alice, come back all is forgiven.

From the future: Hi gang!



[yet also from the past ]

I'm in the US. We got here first.

Typical...

But on a daily/ hourly basis we're in your future all the time!

Don't I know it. Y'all get half a day's work done before I get up. I feel lazy.

I don't worry about the past.
I don't worry about the future.
I just deal with the here and now.

I'd be a carp time traveller wouldn't I?

No, you'd be a good one. You wouldn't get confused.