h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I could, right now, willingly commit manslaughter if it meant that I could have a cigarette. Well, ok, I am exaggerating a bit. But not that much.

The thing I don't understand is why. If I did have a cigarette, it wouldn't actually be an earth-shattering event. I would just smoke it, and nothing would actually change. My mood would change - I would be less irritable, I'm sure - but that wouldn't be because of any effect the nicotine had, it would just be because the addiction had been satiated.

So what is it about the tobacco smoke that turns me into a...well, let's be frank, turns me into a junkie? When the urge comes on me, I'm no different from the guy who's shooting up in the Burger King toilets.

It's the stupidest thing to be addicted to.

Its an addiction; you need to feed the addiction, because* it is an addiction;

its very simular to coffee in some ways; People who smoke, often say 'it calms me down', and, yes, it does, but, actually, no it doesn't; you only need to 'calm down', to relieve the non calmness that is created by having the addiciton, and not* feeding it... viscious circle one thinks

I really should quit... not necessarily for any health reasons, but just becuase its getting so damn expensive

ahh, caffine; there was a fabulus, study, a while ago; people who are addicted/regularly need coffee, say they 'need' it to wake up; no; they need* caffine, to get themselves, only as awake as non addicts, are, wihtout the need of the stimultent.... an occasional caffine fix, will no doubt raise ones alertness, but in a regular drinker/addict, it just gets one from the 'withdrawel' 'low' to the 'fix high', which is actually just at the zero point damn, now I want a cig

It's over a year since I last had one, but there is part of me that still wants one, especially when I'm in the pub and can smell it wafting in.

Yeah, that's another thing that's weird. I know people who haven't smoked for ten or twenty years, but once in a blue moon, something happens in their heads and they go "Damn, I'd love a cigarette right now..."

I'm sort of constantly giving up smoking, with varying degrees of success each time. Sometimes I've been off them for a couple of months, other times for a couple of hours. It's never really a failure though. Because even a failed attempt means I've cut down a lot, and if nothing else put a lot more cash in my pocket and puff in my lungs.

I've never really tried to give up... not since I started... hmmm... about twenty years ago when I was 17 although, I didn't smoke for a few months, due to being in hospital, and a coma... I should never have really started up again... I keep saying I'll try quit, even if just* for a month, a week, etc, just to see how impossible or otterwise it is I'd still like to cut down a bit, just becuase of the expense... seem to average about 16 a day nowdays

Being in a coma would be one way to not smoke. But it's a bit too drastic!

I'm not sure what percentage of it is actual addiction to the chemicals, and what percentage is just ritual and force of habit. There definitely is an element of physical addiction, but I reckon it's 80-90% habit.

F'rinstace, I was up a mountain one time, and I dropped my fegs in a boghole without realising it. When I discovered that, I went into a panic, but I continued the hike for another four or five hours and didn't have withdrawal symptoms or anything. So apart from the ten-minute panic, I functioned normally, so I conclude that it's not that hard to stop. Except...

I lost quite a lot of weight too, whilst in the coma but... yeh, maybe a bit drastic

I often wonder that too; when I can't* smoke; on the train, etc, I never worry or anything at all... just doesn't seem to 'register'.... yet, when the oppertunity* is there... I'd hazzard a guess 50% or more is habbit/ritual/etc....
'Oh, I've had dinner', *lights up*
'Oh, I've had my first coffee' *lights up*
'Oh, waiting five mins, for friend to arrive/the bus/whatever' *lights up* <etc., etc.,

Sex without the cigarette afterwards though.... nope. can't comprehend that one at all

I know that there's the whole cliche of the post-coital cigarette - but oddly enough that's not usually one of the times I want to smoke.

I'm always just disapointed the sex has stopped... a cigarette as far as I'm concerned, is just a curtasty to the other person... give them a little rest, before we start again...

My experience of sex is probably quite different from yours, in a number of ways.

Why am I talking to 2legs about my sex-life?

I think I need a smoke.

nonsense... Just sit on the couch... and tell Dr 2legs all about it I'm.... unique in several ways amongst both males and females I've known... in some aspects... of sensuality and sexuality... Although I don't think I always was If I carry on like this.... by the time I'm in my 60s.... assuming it carrys on ... upregulating as it were

Mind.... the past week or so... my sleeping has been so bad... I'm not sure I could muster up the energy for anything other than very vanilla hmm... nah... bolderdash... I can always find the energy for that* now I need a cigarette

Here's my advice to take or leave as you wish, but it really made it possible for me to quit when I did and several people I've given this advice to have managed to quit and said it helped them as well.


First rule. Do not say you are "trying" to quit. That leaves a mental expectation for failure. You quit. You pick a day and that's the day you quit even if you smoke another pack in the next week, you still quit on that day. You WILL have a cigarette when the urge is strong. You're quitting, it doesn't happen overnight and the main reasons people fail to quit is because they mistakenly believe that they can quit overnight. They think that if they slip even once, they've failed and they just go back to smoking and feel bad about themselves for "failing". You don't need to add guilt and self loathing to a difficult process. You're looking for a series of smaller accomplishments. That first full day without a cigarette. That first full week. And especially that first full month. After a full month, your physical addiction is pretty much cured.

Now, each time you do slip, think about how bad that cigarette actually tastes and smells. The further along you get, the worse it is. Feel free to smoke those stray cigarettes you find in a forgotten pack under the passenger seat of your car. Those will make it easier to say no.

I knew I had really, really quit when after about a year, a friend at the bar said she didn't know how to blow a smoke ring. I took a few puffs off her cigarette to try and demonstrate. OMG was that disgusting. And wasn't even able to blow a smoke ring. While that could have been because she was smoking "light" cigarettes, it didn't matter. I've never wanted one since.

Imagine they tried to introduce something like cigarettes to the market now. It's expensive, it's bad for your health, tastes disgusting, is addictive, and don't even get me started on the pollution - butts dropped everywhere, smoke, the pesticides used to maintain the monoculture of a tobacco plantation... Who in their right mind would go "oh yeah, I'll buy that!"?

It's only being sold and used because it's traditional. Can't you think of a lot of other traditions that we might as well do away with?