h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

It was with some trepidation that I logged in for my Moderation shift, knowing that all the other Mods were attending the Meet.

We had met that morning in our Fortress Of Cruelty to find out who would be left behind, defending h2g2 against ne'erdowells, ruffians and trolls while the rest got thoroughly lashed on the best ales Manchester could offer (it turns out, after some research, that it is actually possible to buy drinks other than Boddington's there).

There we stood, resplendent in our stylish black uniforms and iron-shod boots, awaiting the appearance of Big Moderator on the telescreen. We had all but given up hope, thinking that maybe we all were to be volunteered for Mod duty on the night of the Meet, when the screen flashed into life and the Friendly face of Big Moderator appeared, smiling belevolently.

'Thank you for attending,' the metallic voice boomed from the speakers, the image - like a cross between Douglas Adams and a young Tom Baker - flickered and then was replaced by a message: "The following error has occured: an unknown error has occured" 'Ah, erm, bugger. Nevermind... just *imagine* my ever smiling visage of benevolence is on screen. Ahem. As you know tonight is the night of the h2g2 Manchester Meet, at which attendance is entirely voluntary on a completely compulsory basis. Unfortunately, as you know, not all of you can attend but because non-attendance is caused by official duty then the summary punishment for failure to attend a voluntary meet will be waived on this occasion.' As one we all breated a sigh of relief, a Moderator being Moderated was a sad creature... confused and lonely, not knowing whether they are coming or going half the time.

'I have computed the most efficient running of the operation and have chosen two names for duty this night. And the two volunteers are...' there was a pause while dramatic music played; an unfortunate bit of programming from the BBC days known as the Masterchef Algorithm, '...Mr. Dreadful and Psychocandy." The other Mods looked on us pitiably, there were dark legends of what happened to the site on Meet nights and this would be the first time the post-BBC team had had to deal with such things...

To Be Continued...

We thought of you.

Yes, of course we did... *hic*


... often!



lil xx

Yeah.

Yeah. I did, too.

For sure. Really.

Yep.

We waved the other Mods off and took the monorail to h2g2 Towers, where the VR mod booths are kept (we want to have them in the Fortress, but there's something wierd about the way the Beeb connected them up so until Pastey and his goblins can figure it out they stay in the Towers).

The building itself was eerily quiet, with only the faint rattle of the hampster wheels and the even fainter songs of the s echoing through the deserted corridors. We approached the Restricted Zone and let the machine take our palm prints and retinal scans and made our way to the Moderation Suite, our boots clanging on the Brunel floors. We passed the Auto Filther, which regarded us with cold, glowing eyes and offered its usual greeting of a string of expletives, and climbed into the VR booths. At the speed of thought we logged in and began our shift.

And, really, I wasn't expecting to find myself where I did...

To be continued...

I love this. Any chance you'd write it up for ?



Bel

Certainly will! I'm just kind of winging it at the moment but when it's done I'll stick it in an Entry and let you know.

You walked on my Brunel??