h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hallo

Come here and rest awhile if you need some TLC.

I am only just around the corner. If you need me, please leave a message and I will get back to you as soon as I can.

Thank you

Hello you lovely you. Just checking this is working.
Corrie

Well done, you beautiful you.

Your page looks very



Corrie

Corrie,

I feel I've got to go and lie down after all that hard work.

Let's have a and take it easy. Want to finish my book, 2 More lined up. Never enough time, is there?

Lots of

Hi Fly

This is wonderful!

Love the windmill - reminds me of a weekend we spent in Amsterdam a few years ago!



Ruth

Hi Fly

I was reading until 1am - thats 4 nights on the trot!

Will be quite happy when I've finished the re-reading of Patricia Cornwell, and then I can start on something new.

I do try and read a novel followed by a 'work' book - only thing is the 'work' books send me to sleep within seconds

Am printing off course handouts at the moment for Mondays management development course - whoopy do - exciting stuff here in the world of HATS (my company name - nothing to do with 'chapeaux!)

Ruth

Hallo Ruth,

Can I borrow your "work" book?
I put my novel away at midnight or thereabouts, go to sleep only to wake up at 4-15. Wide awake. Got up before dawn and now, eyes red and aching hope to-night will be better.

Why is it? A thought comes into your head and it won't go away during the night.

Hey! I'm supposed to sit here and dole out TLC, not sit here moaning. Difficult to change habits, isn't it?

I thought that if I went to ONLINE and clicked onto my own name I would see what you see, but that didn't work.

I can't remember if I read any of Patricia Cornwell, I've often seen her books in the Library. At the moment I'm reading all of Erica James's books, a friend is hooked and buys them all and then passes them onto me. They are easy to read, very descriptive, romances without being soppy.

Isn't Corrie clever? AND patient, you should know we've been trying to set this up for days, but it kept going wrong.
Still, we made it.

Is it you who is in Dorking? I do get people muddled up. I'm not too far away, have visited the Vinyard several times.

See you

Hi-ya cheeryFLYBYNIGHT

Try this now mostly called a loo-brush but thats H2G2 for you

---------Careful what you wish for---------------------

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. As he sits, the waitress comes over and asks for their orders.

The man says, "I'll have a hamburger, fries and a coke," and turns to the ostrich, "What's yours?"

"I'll have the same," says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress returns with the order. "That will be $6.40 please," and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment.

The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, "I'll have a hamburger, fries and a coke," and the ostrich says, "I'll have the same."

Once again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.

This becomes a routine until late one evening, the two enter again.

"The usual?" asks the waitress. "No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and salad," says the man, "same for me," says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress comes with the order and says, "That will be $12.62." Once again the man pulls exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table.

The waitress can't hold back her curiosity any longer.

"Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change out of your pocket every time?"

"Well," says the man, "several years ago I was cleaning the attic and I found an old lamp. When I rubbed it a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes.

My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there."

"That's brilliant!" says the waitress. "Most people would wish for a million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!"

"That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there," says the man.

The waitress asks, "One other thing, sir, what's with the ostrich?"

The man sighs, pauses, and answers,

"My second wish was for a tall chick with long legs who agrees with everything I say."


ES

Hiya ES

I wonder what his third wish was!
Seems to me he had a good relationship there.

Oh, I'm sorry, I told you I was thick. I took it for granted he had THREE wishes.

Ah well, he could always cook it for Christmas.

Evening All

Love the joke ES - just sent it to my folks - usually can't send them the jokes I get through as they might be a tad offended!

And yes Fly, I'm the one who lives near Dorking - in the village which has the bonfire!

Dorking is gearing up for the Royal visit tomorrow, seemingly the Vineyard is going to be the lunch place for our prestigious visitors!

Ruth

Hiya Twirlet,

D'you know, I've been thinking all afternoon what that hill is called everybody troops to in the nice weather. It's just at the edge of my brain all the time.(Starts with a B doesn't it?)
First time we climbed it, there was 6 of us, three couples. We had brought a picnic, large boxes of all sorts of food, pies and cakes, salads, bread, beer and wine and the three men had to carry them from the car.
We stood at the bottom of the hill and saw no way we could get up there. Started off, Gordon would go in front, it was so steep, soon one of my friends lost both heels of her shoes, another one was hanging on to a tree and didn't dare let go. The men struggled with their boxes. It took us hours, but we eventually made it, only to see there was a road and proper paths leading to the top. I shall never forget it.

Second time we went, Margaret fell and broke her arm.

Nowadays it's a stopping place for our coach outings. (Comfort station)

The vinery is nice, isn't it? Have you tasted their wines?

Shall we have one or two now? Coming up

Have you seen my new page? And I've started a journal.
Things are looking up.

Hi Fly

Box Hill might be the place you mean!

My reason for moving to Dorking 17 years ago was to work in the hotel at the bottom of the hill - I met my wonderful husband there - although I don't think either of us thought each was wonderful at the time (that's another story! )

I just love the Vineyard - 2003 is meant to be a serious vintage, and my cousin (who lives in Kent) has given me her order for when it comes on the market! We do like the late harvest wine, but that doesn't happen every year!

My first ever skiing lesson was on Box Hill - about 13 years ago, we had a deluge, so the man-in-doors and our mates all headed up Box Hill to ski! Now I realise that even having vertigo, skiing in the Alps, with chair lifts and apres ski, is a lot better than Box Hill - but the memory is there!

As for other things - R.Schumaker is calling the shots on the brilliant (if he can stay on the track) Montoya this weekend - just hope that the GP is more interesting than Melbourne - it can't be less boring!

Twurlit

Yes, of course, Box Hill.

How funny, I didn't know anybody ever skid (skied? skiid?) on there. Can you imagine us all trudging up on the wrong side of the hill? We couldn't understand how all those people we saw walking on the top ever got up there. LOL

Must keep aneye out for the harvest wine then. Have you ever tried our local Nyetimber? It was called champagne at first, but now that's no longer allowed as it doesn't come from France, but it's a wonderful sparkling wine. About £18 a bottle, sold only locally. It was served at the Queen's Golden Wedding being chosen the best from a blind tasting.

Yes, I hope this G.P. is going to be better, strange, isn't it, that we settle down and hope for the best each time. And so often disappointed. Yet, when other people (non-fans) say anything about the "procession" I get very indignant. Thing is, they've never watched a whole race, so can't ever know what's going on. I shout: "Of course they'te going round and round following one another. What do you want? Some of them starting the other end, going the other way?

Have you seen my new page?

<Hallo,

I'll forget the coffee any large whiskeys around? Hic!..WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!..talking of which! You lot are getting too good at this thing. Slow the flies down me eyes are going squiffy!

Hallo Toggy,

Have a bottle of single Malt. Nobody's looking. It'll straighten your eyes out.

Maybe I'll have the same as my eyes are nearly shut, been sneezing all day. Daren't look in a mirror. Good thing you can't see me.

Watch out! Here comes the bottle. (is there a smiley for that?)

Cheers!!!

Says the woman butting-in (hope it's OK):

I would love a whiskey - can't remember the last time I had one - think it was a toothache!

Shall we lobby the wonderful hootoo artists and ask them to make a smiley? Bless 'em, bet they would try - they are all so loverley.

....hic......hic......hic

Lots of to you both

Hi

many thanks for the whisky - just what I needed - hope you don't mind me sneaking in and helping myself!

'Sneaking in' - have you heard the 'Creeping In' song from the new Norah Jones album - I think its brilliant!

Off to bed

twurlit

Somewhere to someone I have posted a message about "The Alarm Clock Fiasco"..for some reason I seem to have stuck it in the book section of thingies page!...I got carried away and forgot where I was Mrs Tog has had an afternoon out with yours truly and is rather under the weather

Me thinks the jacket spuds and cottage pies may be a tad over done

She is orf to Preston tomorrow to go shopping with daughter..now then what can I do with my day from 10.00am - 17.00 ish PaintBe sensibleHmmmm

Hi Toggy,

Well, if the weather is like to-day, why don't you come over and do some gentle weeding for me?
I shall have the drinks, glasses and nibbles all set out in the summerhouse. Bloody hot in there to-day, I can tell you, but we can open the doors and windows. I'm looking forward to it. Date?