h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The Spy I never knew
By hookedsamuel

People in story: No Comment
Location of story: kendal



Peter
I knew you spoke few languages but German?
I hope the story has a happy ending.
Ron

This post has been removed.

This post has been removed.

Ron

I am completely and utterly astounded that my reply to you has been taken off by the Moderators. Have they no sense of humour at all?

Regards,

Peter

Peter
Moi aussi!
Ron

Hi Peter
I've just been delving deeper into the House Rules relating to action by the Moderators and have found the following:
"Posts containing languages other than English may be removed."

All is now revealed.... it is not that we have been naughty boys but merely too erudite and using 'Mock' German is apparently also verboten (Can I say verboten Mr/Ms Moderator?)

So Peter, start writing your lines:

I must not use foreign words
I must not use foreign words
I must not use foreign words
I must not use foreign words
I must not use foreign words
I must not use foreign words
I must not use foreign words
I must not use foreign words

Ron

Hi Peter,
Sie brauchen sich keiner sorgen zu machen. Konnen Sie bitte langsamer sprachen, Verstehen Sie.
You will get this when their interpreters catch up and if you do the above it gives them a chance meanwhile keep doing the lines.

I must not speak in foreign tongues
I must not speak in foreign tongues
Et Al.
Regards Frank.

Peter -
I think you should have used Hoche Deutsch...nicht vernacular Deutsch........you know how stuck up they are ?
dien freunden Tomas

Peter/Tom
You've just reminded me of something I'd forgotten about years ago and I MUST tell someone before I forget it again!
Many years ago, I was Production Controller for an offshoot of a large public company and I was based on the 3rd floor of a large building.
The MD, who was on the top floor knew that I spoke a few languages and one day asked me up to his office to do some German translation for him.
Our conversation went something like this.

'Ron, do me a favour, I've got this chap on the phone calling from Zurich. He's placed a large order for some girls tunics and he now wants to modify it. Instead of a Tunic top he wants crossover straps. I want you to tell him its not possible to alter the order at this late stage'

'Sorry Harold, my German is strictly of the Military kind. If you want me to ask him to come out with his hands up or he'll get a burst up his backside, then I'm your man, but if its to do with girls tunics then I'm sorry but I'll have to pass!

Ron