h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I am sure that you would realise that drunk food is not only limited to kebabs and other offerings that seem to come form the leg of some form of accident victim, Marmite is a necessary addition to any drunkards larder. You will find that on returning home form a late noght that the only thing left to eat is the scrapings frim a two week old casserole, a tomato that has unknown white specks on them, a half tin of beans that needs a trim and one crust of bread that has gone a little soggy around the edges.

Therefore, marmite is an important addition as if you smear enough of it on the above items, youwill only taste the marmite and this would aid you in keeping the nine Budweisers down rather than running the gaintlet to the toilet.

Indeed. It would also be foolish to discount other such products - Sandwich spread is the mainstay of many an alcoholic snack. Toast toppers can only be eaten by someone to ratted to realise that it has the texture and consistency of congealed cat vomit.

Beer goggles are undoubtedly to blame. You can drink ten pints and wind up in a pigsty eating swill, but your inebriate brain conjurs the impression of fine dining surrounded by beautiful and intelligent company.

Wars have been lost as a result of far less.