h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hey, just relax, put your brain in neutral and enjoy it. Why do people want to analyse a piece of fantasy and read all this 'deep' meaning into it. It's a piece of fun I think.
Most of your criticisms are valid (though I personally thought Liam Neeson was the best thing about the film) but they're not enough to put ME off the film. Maybe I'm too prepared to accept 'bubble gum for the eyes' as it's been referred to.

I like bubblegum and my brain is always in neutral but I didn't enjoy it - I was just being specific about what made it unenjoyable

The simple fact is that the Phantom Manence is a "Special Effects" movie. You don't go to see Episode One for the story, but for the "Ooohs and Ahhhs" of the latest in Computer Generated Imaging.

I am personally a strong Star Wars fan (not obessed mine you), so for the "real" Star Wars fans out there: I'm sorry if I sound like I'm insulting Star Wars.

Come on! Jar Jar Binks was funny. How many people out there think that "How rude" was funny in that accented voice of Jar Jar's. If you didn't, you have to admit he does look funny.

No, Jar Jar Binks was NOT funny. He was mostly annoying but was probably there to appeal to the kiddies. Still, I've finally heard someone say something positive about him....

Jar Jar Binks was definately for the kiddies 1st, and merchantising 2nd. (or was it the other way around?).

The story of Phantome Menace itself was written to fit the action sequences in.
-They go to Tatooine for the fantastic Pod Racer scene (motor racing).
-They use Jar Jar Binks friends the "distract" the Federation for the cool ground battle scene (just to show off their CGI technology).
-The get the Naboo fighters to destroy the Command Ship for the space battle scene (a Star Wars movie has to have one of these).
-The bodyguard disquised as Queen Admidala was to put a "twist" in the story.
In truth the whole movie was to make merchandise, take advantage of the latest in CGI technology, and as a liftoff platform for Episode 2.

I have to admit that there was some serious faults in it.
But can you imagine having to say 'I sense a vergence in the force' completely seriously without laughing??
Considering what a cliché star wars has become I think they did ok.

The duel of the fates you have to admit was pretty incredible.
Despite the fact the choreography was clear.
When Qui-gon jinn died, they acted that well.

Unfortunately, we cannot go and make all the changes we feel are necessary to the phantom menace, so we will just have to accept it.

That fight scene between Qui-gon, Obi-wan, and Darth Maul was awesome! That scene was practised even before filming by stuntmen to get the intensity and skill into the scene. One stuntman did so well that they signed him on as Darth Maul (dialogue: about two lines). Latest rumour i heard is that they are going to use the same stuntman/actor as Boba Fett in his prime (if George Lucas decides to include Fett in either Episode 2 or 3).

The only complaint i have is that Obi-wan slicing Darth Maul in half was an anti-climax to the lightsaber duel scene. Darth Maul being so skillful, so "in" with the force, that he could be caught off guard by an ordinary Jedi trick.

Of course it's not THAT bad. It is much, much worse!
The guy has sold out! He had better get the next one right.

One major downing was all this tacky merchandising.
That was when he sold out.