h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I would like to offer the following for consideration to be added to the article on Beer :

Beer is a hybrid drink, coming in two categories, and various flavours within each category. It is an alcoholic*1 drink served in Public Houses, and other liscenced premises and consists of either Ale or Lager, liberally mixed with water, and served in any glass you like, as long as it is not clean. Ideally, gasses should be involved in the pouring process, to further dilute the mixture, and form what is commonly known as the "head"tm.

There are many strange customs surrounding the drinking of beer, the most common of which is to talk succesively louder, and less coherently with each pint*2 consumed. Other customs include, but are not limited to, dancing on tables, and singing karaoke*3.


1 Alcohol. An amusing liquid whos strange properties delude imbibers with the surety that they are invulnerable, funny, and irresistable to the opposite sex.
2 Pint. An outlawed measure in Europe, which none the less is ignored by the general population of alcoholic vendors with some success.
3 Karaoke. An Oriental form of self punishment. The willing subjects have to follow a bouncing ball as it traces the lyrics for a song, the backing tune to which is being played for all to hear. Subjects must attempt to match these words to the rhythm played, and produce something that in no way matches what has been previously released by the performing artist credited with the song.

Ale, Lager or *Stout* how can you forget the Black Stuff, which is most definately beer.

My apologies for omitiing the fabled stout, of which I partook last night.

More power to the brewers of this fine beverage.

Maybe I'm missing your little joke, but stout is most certainly an ale, in my experience. A beer to be sure, but more specifically an ale.

Shade, I like your addendum idea, hopefully it will get looked at.